"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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has anyone tried not to masturbate for a long period of time?

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Materialism

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I know there is an masturbation thread and I've read the whole thread, but I would like a thread where everyone who has actually DONE a few months without any type of ejaculation (wether from masturbation or sex) tell me their stories.

So anyone who has been, lets say atleast one month without masturbation; How did you feel it changed you?

PS. I dont give a **** wether people think this has got anything to do with beeing a "DJ" or not.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Anomalous

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I went 2 weeks without masterbating. I felt like i could do anything. I went a month but i masterbated the 2nd week so.
 

Sophomakhos

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The longest I've been without it was I think about three weeks. However, I would not recommend stopping for long periods of time. Masturbation does release stress, and releases sexual tension. Not masturbating tends to make you lose control of your moderation, and you get hornier much more easily. This affects how you behave yourself as well. Ultimately, you're going to start again anyway. I once read a good opinion on this: 95% of men will say that they masturbate, and the other 5% are liars.
 

ApocalypseCow2

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The problem for me is that if I go for more than a week or so without doing it, I'll eventually have a dream that will take care of the problem for me :( So I can usually go about a week, and then start getting worried.
 

wowiehowie

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Originally posted by ApocalypseCow2
The problem for me is that if I go for more than a week or so without doing it, I'll eventually have a dream that will take care of the problem for me :( So I can usually go about a week, and then start getting worried.
Yup, it sure does!!:crackup:

-and I'll tend to agree with Sophomakhos.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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diablo

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