picard
Master Don Juan
Has anyone tried eHarmony online dating site ?
Does this site have real women ?
Does this site have real women ?
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Maybe some truth to this... I met a woman on eharmony and went on two dates with her. When we first met, she was driving a new Lincoln MKZ and was wearing a real 9K Rolex. She informed me her ex husband had won my state's lottery several years ago for about 60 million. I did some checking and damn sure was a fact. I knew there was nothing I could do for this woman used to the high life as I was on a public safety salary.tihash said:I've tried it. Also tried POF.
eharmony is to career-oriented, never-married, BMW-driving, no-kids women as POF is to single mommy, bus-riding, tatted-up sluts.
But everything has its pros and cons. Those career-oriented, never-married, BMW-driving, no-kids women can be brutal to deal with, have unreasonable expectations, and be single for a REASON (i.e., too picky, too high self-esteem, etc)
tihash said:I've tried it. Also tried POF.
eharmony is to career-oriented, never-married, BMW-driving, no-kids women as POF is to single mommy, bus-riding, tatted-up sluts.
But everything has its pros and cons. Those career-oriented, never-married, BMW-driving, no-kids women can be brutal to deal with, have unreasonable expectations, and be single for a REASON (i.e., too picky, too high self-esteem, etc)
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
^^^^^ THIS ^^^^^LeftyLoosey said:Online dating is a mirage. It's a short-cut. If you have to resort to online dating, it means you've skipped the self-improvement steps that you need to take before you chase women. If you're truly making strides toward becoming a man, women will fall into your lap.
Also, think about it. What kind of women have to date online? The ones that men don't want. Think about how many opportunities an attractive woman has to meet men. Why should she have to go online?
I THRID THIS !!!!LeftyLoosey said:Online dating is a mirage. It's a short-cut. If you have to resort to online dating, it means you've skipped the self-improvement steps that you need to take before you chase women. If you're truly making strides toward becoming a man, women will fall into your lap.
Also, think about it. What kind of women have to date online? The ones that men don't want. Think about how many opportunities an attractive woman has to meet men. Why should she have to go online?
I would have agreed with this sentiment at one time but have a different perspective now. As mentioned, I live in a rural area and there are few women here that meet my admittedly high standards. Most are married or have relocated. I operate my own business and often work 80 hour weeks in addition to raising my two children. At 42, I don't have the time or energy to go prowling on the few weekends I have available but can easily spend 30 minutes browsing and sending/answering emails. Besides, the only places to go are bar/grills where most of the women are looking for a wallet with legs. Was married to one of those and don't want another high maintenance chic but rather an independent, confident and secure woman. Trust me....I check out women everywhere I go from grocery stores to bookstores to malls and I'm fishing in a shallow pool. Unlike some of you, I have no interest in hustling 20 yr old women. That was fine until I hit 30 but would rather be with someone who can actually hold an intellectual conversation and isn't consumed with MTV and the latest episode of "The Bachelor"LeftyLoosey said:Online dating is a mirage. It's a short-cut. If you have to resort to online dating, it means you've skipped the self-improvement steps that you need to take before you chase women. If you're truly making strides toward becoming a man, women will fall into your lap.
Also, think about it. What kind of women have to date online? The ones that men don't want. Think about how many opportunities an attractive woman has to meet men. Why should she have to go online?
I have not been here for ages and this post just about sums up why. Have plodded through the forum with a bit of time to kill and very little has changed here. Now I dont want you to take this personally, but you have just summed up the basic, bull**** beta attitude that sees you resorting to dating websites.sandman007 said:I've tried it and will tell you it has it's pros and cons. The upside is you will find a number of attractive, well-educated, career oriented women. The downside is like another poster mentioned, you can only view the profiles that the website considers a potential match. That could weed out some of the undesirables but sometimes people click for the strangest of reasons when they don't necessarily have a great deal in common. Also, it's like other matchmaking websites in that while there are some good catches to be had, there are far more women on there who are obviously not attractive even in dim light. Not a big deal if you aren't shallow when it comes to physical appearance but it matters to me probably does to you as well. The biggest problem I had with it though, is that many of the hottest chics I was matched with live 6 hours away. I live in a small town in a rural area so that wouldn't be a problem if you are reasonably close to a metro area. Corresponded with several who I would have loved to have met but distance was too great due to career obligations and the fact that I have my kids most of the time. Dated one smoking hot girl for a little while that I met on there that lived only an hour away. We had some fun together but in the end just didn't click so take that for what it's worth with regard to the "matching criteria" e-Harmony uses. Supposed to have another girl I met from there lined up for some erotic fun and games when we can get our schedules coordinated. Why not try it for 3 months and see what you think? You're virtually guaranteed to meet a few interesting chics and you never know what will happen.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.