Half-rant incoming

[lizardking82]

I went out tonight for a rock party, was in quite a good mood actually, went with my (kind of) main plate. Now, I was having quite a good time when I go up to the taxi and we enter the cab together. There, I ask her (no hidden intentions) if she saw my last pic that I posted on social media (a pic of a girl I shot, am a professional photographer). The pic was a nude. She looks at it and her smile vanishes LOL I am like "do you like it?" and she goes "No.". OK, I said to myself "**** it, she's a bit jealous, nothing to emphasize here" so I go on with my usual attitude.

Later on, at around half of the party, the leadsinger of the band introduces the band and among them, the bass player, a tall, OK looking guy with short curls. She goes "yeah, yeah!" like he's her brother or sth. I am like "OK, you trynna make me jealous? Not gonna work, babe" -> in my thoughts. So I keep on my cool attitude, but she keeps on turning her head back to see him almost everytime she passed by. It pissed me off because it was at least disrespectful IMO, but on the other hand, I did not wanna let her know that this kinda pissed me off cause that'd be just weak. So **** it, I keep on acting cool, but after we leave the party, I was quite distant, calm, didn't talk to her almost at all as we walked towards the cab. In the end, we split the cost of the whole evening and I give her a kiss on the lips and say good night.

Now, I want to give her a lesson. No matter how much girls hit on me, when I am with her, I don't go around turning my head and getting all excited about any girl. She did so since she is misbehaving, I think it is time to withdraw attention. Do you guys think it is right to do it and what is the RIGHT way to do this?

UPDATE: she wrote herself calling me baby and telling me how she cannot sleep. I didn;t see the message and did not answer, but just wanted to add info. I think she already feels she ****ed up somewhere.

 

[Infern0]

She's a plate so you dont have a right to be angry.

If her actions bothered you, you might want to have a think about "why" they did.

I think this is one of those cases where its more about yoy than her.

Just being real.

 

[lizardking82]

So I am supposed to be fine with her acting childish and trynna make me jealous in an obvious way?

 

[Infern0]

So I am supposed to be fine with her acting childish and trynna make me jealous in an obvious way?

What im saying is its getting to you too much.

Plates dont take up space in your head.

 

[Initiatedindenial]

If she was paying attention to someone else you should have gotten someone to pay attention to you.

Regarding the text message I wouldn't put too much meaning to it, she's just trying to baby talk you to forget her behaviour. For as much as you know she could have been texting the band boy jist before you.

 

[Reykhel]

So I am supposed to be fine with her acting childish and trynna make me jealous in an obvious way?

It sounds quite petty on your part. For want of a better turn of phrase it does sound like beta anger....

Firstly, because of her non reaction to your social media question.....you assumed that she was jealous......this seems to
be pure projection right there. You were possibly annoyed at her non reaction or maybe you wanted her to be jealous......
Anyway, mind reading is classed as an error of thinking........

It sounds like you made (in your mind) too much of a big deal about the non reaction to your social media question and you carried it (the annoyance) with you to the concert. You've then overreacted to her irrelevant reaction to one of the band members....

I mean come on.....it was the leader singer introducing the band and she shouts "yeah yeah" and you immediately get jealous because of that?? At least she gets enthusiastic at concerts......

Just like your original assumption.........you're assuming that her reaction was to try and make you jealous.........

Even if it was (which it wasn't) you've so easily entered into her frame.

I agree with @Infern0 that this is more about you and your inner game.

 

[lizardking82]

Meh, here's the whole thing. She's crazy about me, I can sense that.

It sounds quite petty on your part. For want of a better turn of phrase it does sound like beta anger....

Firstly, because of her non reaction to your social media question.....you assumed that she was jealous......this seems to
be pure projection right there. You were possibly annoyed at her non reaction or maybe you wanted her to be jealous......
Anyway, mind reading is classed as an error of thinking........

It sounds like you made (in your mind) too much of a big deal about the non reaction to your social media question and you carried it (the annoyance) with you to the concert. You've then overreacted to her irrelevant reaction to one of the band members....

I mean come on.....it was the leader singer introducing the band and she shouts "yeah yeah" and you immediately get jealous because of that?? At least she gets enthusiastic at concerts......

Just like your original assumption.........you're assuming that her reaction was to try and make you jealous.........

Even if it was (which it wasn't) you've so easily entered into her frame.

I agree with @Infern0 that this is more about you and your inner game.

No, she accepted she was trynna make me jealous. It is not about the "yeah, yeah" part at all, it is when she started following him with her eyes that inside of me I went like "what you doin'" LOL there was a moment where she literally said (apparently, in a joking manner) "mmm, what a boy" and I immediately told her "you want me to find out his number? I can secure that for you" and then she kinda cooled off.

But I agree with you, I walked into her frame, shouldn't have.

 

[Desdinova]

There, I ask her (no hidden intentions) if she saw my last pic that I posted on social media (a pic of a girl I shot, am a professional photographer). The pic was a nude. She looks at it and her smile vanishes LOL I am like "do you like it?" and she goes "No."

Why did you feel it necessary to show her that? Of course it's going to piss her off. This is the kind of 5hit you shouldn't be telling any of your plates. You divulge that information if you're having the LTR talk.

She goes "yeah, yeah!" like he's her brother or sth. I am like "OK, you trynna make me jealous? Not gonna work, babe"

You set a precedence that it's okay to intentionally cause jealousy in your working relationship with her, so she's going to do it right back. Whenever you're dating a woman, you're the one who leads and sets the rules. The woman will (and should) follow your example. You have nobody to blame here but yourself.

 

[lizardking82]

Why did you feel it necessary to show her that? Of course it's going to piss her off. This is the kind of 5hit you shouldn't be telling any of your plates. You divulge that information if you're having the LTR talk.



You set a precedence that it's okay to intentionally cause jealousy in your working relationship with her, so she's going to do it right back. Whenever you're dating a woman, you're the one who leads and sets the rules. The woman will (and should) follow your example. You have nobody to blame here but yourself.

Why would it piss her off? I work with sexy models all the time, that is what I do, that is what I love doing (photography and in general, not only with sexy models). She'd have seen it anyway. So how would you proceed from here?

 

[Von]

Why would it piss her off? I work with sexy models all the time, that is what I do, that is what I love doing (photography and in general, not only with sexy models). She'd have seen it anyway. So how would you proceed from here?

It would be fine, if it wasn't the first date.... you've put her ego in competition. My guest....

Ask her out for a walk a morning, somewhere nice and easy access... let her ''discover'' other side than the pretty girls in your life

 

[lizardking82]

It would be fine, if it wasn't the first date.... you've put her ego in competition. My guest....

Ask her out for a walk a morning, somewhere nice and easy access... let her ''discover'' other side than the pretty girls in your life

It was not the first date, @Von . We have been dating and having sex for about two months now, have had lunches, dinners, sweets, walks.

 

[Von]

It was not the first date, @Von . We have been dating and having sex for about two months now, have had lunches, dinners, sweets, walks.

Oh than she's competitive , proceed like nothing happened and just explain its part of your work and you can't wait to take pics of her etc...

 

[lizardking82]

Oh than she's competitive , proceed like nothing happened and just explain its part of your work and you can't wait to take pics of her etc...

She actually wrote to me early morning and told me she could not sleep all night (I don't know why I tend to doubt this, but anyways) and told me why she acted that way last night. We completely cleared the air, I think. But still, I wanna know the art of taking away attention and for how long when chicks misbehave in general.

 

[@Jonanthony]

So your contributions here are heavy .....And lizardking I wish at ur age I had the knowledge and DGAF attitude u possess. It appears to me that if ur feel was soft punishment was necessary then ;

Whilst not recommended often ; politelty excuse yourself ( early morning / tired /blah blah ) pay full cost of bill and depart... Then strong NC until you feel that her interest remains where it belongs .
And lesson learned here, no more showing of the nudes..tasteful and artistic certainly, just not every aspect of your work....those can be judged by a differing audience for constructive feedback .

 

[zekko]

Why would it piss her off? I work with sexy models all the time, that is what I do, that is what I love doing (photography and in general, not only with sexy models).

I think you know why it might piss her off. If you didn't think the nude photo was relative to your story, you wouldn't have included it.

I'm all for withdrawing attention if a girl is acting up. Which you do by literally just turning your attention to something else. It just seems like in this case, you were the one who was pushing her buttons first. So with that in mind, I'm not so sure she deserves to be "punished".

The missing component here is just how familiar is she with your line of work? Does she know you are photographing naked women on a regular basis? Even if she is, I'm not sure what the point was of shoving it in her face on a date.

 

[The Duke]

Please excuse me for not reading every posting here, but she got jealous when you inquired about the pic you took. She didn't like it because it wasn't her. Next she decides she will give you a dose of your own medicine. This is all pretty typical behavior. It just so happens you don't like it either.

If you decide to be serious about this girl, realize that she will have to come to grips with your "nude" photography. This will likely always cause issues for her.

 

[lizardking82]

Please excuse me for not reading every posting here, but she got jealous when you inquired about the pic you took. She didn't like it because it wasn't her. Next she decides she will give you a dose of your own medicine. This is all pretty typical behavior. It just so happens you don't like it either.

If you decide to be serious about this girl, realize that she will have to come to grips with your "nude" photography. This will likely always cause issues for her.

Thank you for taking the time to read and answer, man. I think you are spot on. She is still in testing mode inside my head regarding the possible long term future with her and these are the kind of things that make it or break it, in my eyes.

 

[Roober]

You posted it on social media, and then asked for her validation? Regardless of your intent, both actions are feminine. Don't share information you don't need to share! If she asks you about it, you say casually about how it was no big deal.

Then she goes on and intentionally makes you jealous. You may have said you seemed unphased, but what you said and your general demeanor very likely said otherwise. Women pick up on this $hit easily and and the masters of the realm, don't play her games.

She won the night and then threw you a bone, just to let you know she is pulling the strings. Need to work on your wom4nese...

You showed her picture, she said she didn't like it = your a fvcking ****, payback is a b1tch mother fvcker

 

[lizardking82]

You posted it on social media, and then asked for her validation? Regardless of your intent, both actions are feminine. Don't share information you don't need to share! If she asks you about it, you say casually about how it was no big deal.

Then she goes on and intentionally makes you jealous. You may have said you seemed unphased, but what you said and your general demeanor very likely said otherwise. Women pick up on this $hit easily and and the masters of the realm, don't play her games.

She won the night and then threw you a bone, just to let you know she is pulling the strings. Need to work on your wom4nese...

You showed her picture, she said she didn't like it = your a fvcking ****, payback is a b1tch mother fvcker

I think you should calm down LOL I had loads of fun at the party since that is mainly what I went for, not to spend another 3-4 hours with her. Next day I went to another shooting session I had. It unphased me for a short period of time. Then I got back to normal and that is where I have been ever since. I couldn't care less that she didn't like the picture. 200 other people liked it and most importantly, I liked it. I was just curious what she thought of that because I have had girlfriends/plates in the past and other plates now react quite calmly and say it was a superb picture. She's just insecure overall so she kinda had to make up for it by "putting down my work" which as I said, I don't even really mind, it just made it funny. Then, when she went to "jokingly" (as she said afterwards) follow the band guy, I was like "what? why? in front of me? you kidding me?"

 

[zekko]

Well, I might consider it a warning flag if some chick went on a date with me, and the first thing she did was say "Hey, look at this picture of this guy's d!ck I took. Do you like it"?