Group thread

[Mbuckets82]

Now I’m in this group thread with 5 friends who are dads and married. Recently my one buddy joined who knows of the guys but not really friends. I’ve known them all for 20 years.
This new guy is a big muscle guy and was talking about lifting with my other friend and somehow my name came up. Muscle guy calls me a bag bones and other friend said he’s got 5 pound weights for me and that his 5 year old son could help me lift them.
Now I’m not a lifter, I run about 25-30 miles a week and prefer body weight exercises. But as a result I’m skinny. 6’1 175.

i reply to my one friend, Your father. Then I say I didn’t say Your mom cuz she passed soMay she RIP.
Then my other friends say that was un called for I should apologize and that is a low blow. Mind you the guy it was directed at didn’t say **** till they all jumped down my throat....then he said it was a low blow.

After a week of not talking they get back on and still say I should apologize even after I said I meant nothing malicious by it. And I don’t apologize For anything if I know meant no harm. I am sorry they feel that way.

so he says nothing again after that but today gets on and claims he was busy but that if anyone else said it he’d be pissed but let it slide. Then thanked the other guys for coming to his defense. Saying it was a poor attempt by me at being funny.

Whatever happened to guys busting balls ?? That’s why I got friends. Not to walk on egg shells. I know they don’t mean harm.

Why jump on me? Makes me wonder. I’m def going radio silent. Sounds like I need a special before I send a text. No thanks.

 

[Lynx nkaf]

Now I’m in this group thread with 5 friends who are dads and married. Recently my one buddy joined who knows of the guys but not really friends. I’ve known them all for 20 years.
This new guy is a big muscle guy and was talking about lifting with my other friend and somehow my name came up. Muscle guy calls me a bag bones and other friend said he’s got 5 pound weights for me and that his 5 year old son could help me lift them.
Now I’m not a lifter, I run about 25-30 miles a week and prefer body weight exercises. But as a result I’m skinny. 6’1 175.

i reply to my one friend, Your father. Then I say I didn’t say Your mom cuz she passed soMay she RIP.
Then my other friends say that was un called for I should apologize and that is a low blow. Mind you the guy it was directed at didn’t say **** till they all jumped down my throat....then he said it was a low blow.

After a week of not talking they get back on and still say I should apologize even after I said I meant nothing malicious by it. And I don’t apologize For anything if I know meant no harm. I am sorry they feel that way.

so he says nothing again after that but today gets on and claims he was busy but that if anyone else said it he’d be pissed but let it slide. Then thanked the other guys for coming to his defense. Saying it was a poor attempt by me at being funny.

Whatever happened to guys busting balls ?? That’s why I got friends. Not to walk on egg shells. I know they don’t mean harm.

Why jump on me? Makes me wonder. I’m def going radio silent. Sounds like I need a special before I send a text. No thanks.

First, got to judge/decide how stable the person/situation is.

Got to start small and use sandwich technique.

Sandwich technique:
Compliment/brutal ballbusting/compliment.

Most importantly, you HAVE to be willing to take ballbusting in return.

 

[HyenaPrince]

Your friends sound like a bunch of p*ssies. BUT, "your father" is pretty uncreative. You should have came back with something more funny. Nonetheless they shouldn't have been butthurt for that long. Who the f*ck cares? No such things in the realm of good friends should even exist longer than a moment. Everybody laughs and it's forgotten.

We always destroy each other when it comes to making jokes. It becomes a damn comedy store. But that's only possible if everyone respects each other on a solid basis and is truly aware of their own and each other's capabilities. Only then can you go that far without crossing some lines.

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

Your father. Then I say I didn’t say Your mom cuz she passed soMay she RIP.

It’s because of this second part. You saying “I didn’t say ‘your mom’ because she’s dead” is basically making fun of his mom for being dead. And THAT is shitty. Shoulda just gone along with them and said something like “at least I can still run a mile without getting a heart attack ” or smth like that. Oryou just should said “ur mom” spelled exactly like that, and ifthey brought up that she was dead, you just say “oh **** yeah my bad” “ur dad” and then put that one burn/diss meme or put #burn or smth lol

 

[Mbuckets82]

Good points. I would have thought that with friends I’ve know for so long after my explanation or saying it wasn’t my intention the it’s water under the bridge. But damn we can’t bust balls anymore? It’s all super sensitive if you ask me.

 

[Atom Smasher]

I don’t even get what “Your father” means.

Your father what?

 

[Mbuckets82]

I don’t even get what “Your father” means.

Your father what?

Instead of saying your mom, I tried your father. Went over well. Lol

 

[Mbuckets82]

The whole thing, my buddy let the other guys jump all over me about and Didn’t say he wasn’t offended until almost a week later and after thid was after the second round of these dudes getting on my case. I swear I’m dealing with women.

 

[Atom Smasher]

Must be a generational thing. I don’t understand “Your father” as a stand-alone. We used to say “Your father [fill in the blank], like he is something or does something.

But back to the point, I’ve found in life that usually when a bunch of guys gang up on a member of a group, they have a consensus of a pre-existing gripe with that member. Then when a precipitating event occurs, that energy is released against him. Did you fit in well and not awkwardly with this group before this happened?

 

[Black Widow Void]

If you actually completed the come-back with “ I didn’t say Your mom cuz she passed so May she RIP. "
... then yep. An apology is in order.

Back in the day, I'd occasionally jokingly say .. "I was so mad at you, I was talking about your mother." At my current age, I can no longer do that because it's now a big risk (many friends have now lost their mothers).

Although some deceased aren't even worthy of good speak, it's always a class act to do so to all.
There's no class in opening up an old wound like this (even if it's someone you don't like)

 

[Black Widow Void]

@Mbuckets82

I gave your posting some additional thought and now suspect that you didn't intentionally mean any ill will toward this person.

Despite certain beliefs on this very forum, there's nothing wrong with admitting mistakes. Perhaps you could find middle ground on the situation... by stating something to the affect of... you were "multitasking and attempted a snappy comeback but also knew that saying "your father" wasn't as good a comeback, but didn't wish to disrespect his mother." Then follow this with "if this caused any uneasy feelings ...that it wasn't [your] intention and for that [you] offer an apology."

Although every forum member doesn't always get along with each other (on this fourm) there is a certain "brotherhood" practiced here. I mention this because next time you need a good come-back response, shoot me a PM and I'll set you up with a good one.

 

[Kotaix]

F*ck'em! They're going to give you crap about being skinny and then they can't take a joke back? Sounds like they've been married for too long and are used to being made to apologize by their wives.

Although I'll agree with DoubleGreatest's suggestion that you should have challenged them to a run.

 

[Lookatu]

Good thing we're guys because we can often get past this $hit, unlike females that holds grudges until they go to their graves...

Be thankful for that aspect...

 

[Mbuckets82]

If the dude first said that hurt or something I’d then say nothing was meant by it and apologize. But, he saw everyone was getting on me and waited then chimed in saying it was a low blow.
Then ok ok maybe he didn’t know what to say.....but it happened again a week later! He made some excuse of packing when I know that dude has his phone on him. But said that my response it didn’t bother him. Why not say that at first? Because he was looking for validation from the group and used this as a speed boat to get there. The saying goes ‘never let a crisis go to waste’ This applies in a lot of areas of life.

Im the only single guy in the group. They def have the married mentality. Just share memes and talk about nothing. They see me, I answer to no one and a few of them choose to.

I know where I stand.

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

You could also start lifting weights too.

 

[2Rocky]

Better thing to do is accept and amplify... "you are right...it's time to move up from the 2.5s...

There are things that are off limits in teasing, Family members, wives/girlfriends, and vehicles are not to be ****ed with...