Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Got the... How many girls have you...

PokerInTheRear

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I've been seeing this girl and we've slept together a few times... Today, in bed, I got asked, "How may girls have I been with?" and "Why won't I be her friend on Facebook?"

How many girls question...

Here's how I handled it - would love to know if you think this was handled properly... (using ****y-funny attitude)

Me: "I don't tell that."
Her: "More or less than 20?"
Me: "I have some freedom of information forms in the car - you could fill one out and get your answer in 20 years."
Her: "Don't you want to know how many guys I've been with?"
Me: "No."

Facebook question...

Her: "Why won't you be my friend on FB?"
Me: "I already have enough friends."
Her: "Ha ha... Seriously?"
Me: "I've got nothing to hide, but I need my life and you need yours. You don't need to see my stuff and I don't need to see yours."

I played these off with some humor and mystery, not begin an as5hole, but firm about it.

Handled well? What would you suggest?
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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jophil28

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Good enough.
 

Falcon25

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Tell her the last girl you friended on FB stalked you for six months.
 

squirrels

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Answer to first question: 2
Answer to second question: I'm not on FaceBook.

Both with a sheepish, sh!t-eating grin. :D

Do NOT underestimate the power of a smile. :D
 

Rollo Tomassi

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Iron Rule of Tomassi # 2

NEVER, under pain of death, honestly or dishonsetly reveal the number of women you've slept with or explain any detail of your sexual experiences with them to a current lover.

The single most disastrous AFC move a man can make is to OVERTLY describe past sexual experiences and/or give a number (accurate or not) to how many women he's been with prior to the one he's with. This simple act, whether you offered the information or she dragged it out of you, ALWAYS comes off as pretensiousness and is often the catalyst for an avalanche of emotional resentment, if not outright emotional blackmail from an insecure woman. This is a rookie mistake that will only take you once to learn.

If a woman puts you on the spot by directly asking you for this information always sidestep this COVERTLY. C&F works wonders in this situation and still keeps the air of mystery and challenge about you.

Her: "So how many girls have you been with?"
You: "You're my first actually"
Her: "Really, how many girls have you been with?"
You:" You mean tonight?"
Her: "C'mon, how many girls have you been with?"
You: "You know, I really lost count after 50" (or something outrageous).

When a woman asks you this question she is seeking confirmation of what she already suspects - NEVER give her this satisfaction. When a woman resorts to OVERT communication (COVERT being her native language) she's generally exhausted her patience to be COVERT and this is a desperation tactic for an insecure woman.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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zekko

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I honestly don't keep track, so I couldn't tell her many girls I've been with even if I wanted to.
 

L B

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I give these 2 honest answers and don't elaborate. Never seemed to fail.

1. Too many to remember.
2. Don't have aim, myspace, twitter, facebook or whever else that kids are doing these days.
 

azanon

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RT's answer(s) are better than yours was Poker. Not just because of the C&F, but also because those answers come across as apathetic. If you give any sort of long/drawn out answer, then it sounds like either you care too much that you were asked that, or that you are hiding something, or like RT suggested that you're bragging.

TBH, that question is a classic sh*ttest question.
 

squirrels

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azanon said:
TBH, that question is a classic sh*ttest question.
True...the question is not, "How many women have you slept with?", it's more, "How do YOU feel about the number of women you've slept with?" Or rather, "Am I special? Or just another notch in your bedpost?"

There's no good answer to it. Say she's "special" and it makes you look spineless. Say she's not, and it makes you look heartless.

I've always like the classic, "A gentleman doesn't kiss and tell" as well. ;)
 

PokerInTheRear

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Thanks guys... RT, I did actually respond with "Your my first" and a smile, but she pushed it and continued to ask. I'm not afraid of walking if she keeps it up.

I already know she has at least one other guy in the mix, but she doesnt know i know. Treading lightly with this one as my gut doesnt like her already.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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davewe

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I liked the "freedom of information" line. More clever than most C&F lines.

PokerInTheRear said:
I've been seeing this girl and we've slept together a few times... Today, in bed, I got asked, "How may girls have I been with?" and "Why won't I be her friend on Facebook?"

How many girls question...

Here's how I handled it - would love to know if you think this was handled properly... (using ****y-funny attitude)

Me: "I don't tell that."
Her: "More or less than 20?"
Me: "I have some freedom of information forms in the car - you could fill one out and get your answer in 20 years."
Her: "Don't you want to know how many guys I've been with?"
Me: "No."

Facebook question...

Her: "Why won't you be my friend on FB?"
Me: "I already have enough friends."
Her: "Ha ha... Seriously?"
Me: "I've got nothing to hide, but I need my life and you need yours. You don't need to see my stuff and I don't need to see yours."

I played these off with some humor and mystery, not begin an as5hole, but firm about it.

Handled well? What would you suggest?
 

Rollo Tomassi

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HER: "How many girls have you been with?"

YOU: "I have an idea, lets ƒuck and then you can tell me how many girls you think I've been with, OK?"
 

Paintballguy

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I never volunteer that number to any chick. Just as I never ask any girl about any of her ex's.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Nutz

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PokerInTheRear said:
I've been seeing this girl and we've slept together a few times... Today, in bed, I got asked, "How may girls have I been with?" and "Why won't I be her friend on Facebook?"

How many girls question...

Here's how I handled it - would love to know if you think this was handled properly... (using ****y-funny attitude)

Me: "I don't tell that."
Her: "More or less than 20?"
Me: "I have some freedom of information forms in the car - you could fill one out and get your answer in 20 years."
Her: "Don't you want to know how many guys I've been with?"
Me: "No."

Facebook question...

Her: "Why won't you be my friend on FB?"
Me: "I already have enough friends."
Her: "Ha ha... Seriously?"
Me: "I've got nothing to hide, but I need my life and you need yours. You don't need to see my stuff and I don't need to see yours."

I played these off with some humor and mystery, not begin an as5hole, but firm about it.

Handled well? What would you suggest?

Aloof, evasive, mysterious. It gets the job done, maintains your privacy, and kicks her attraction up a notch. Just remember that when they pull this sort of stuff to treat it as a **** test. My favorite three methods of dealing **** tests are:

1. Change the subject
2. Ignore
3. Agree & amplify to absurdity <--this is the funnest IMO and there are several examples already given in this thread
 
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