"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Good Idea to Use Jealousy?

JBB84

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Good Idea to Use Jealousy Plot?

A girl who I have a long history of on again off again hooking up recently ended things with me, stating that she wanted to be my friend, continued contacting me every day and making an effort to be really nice. I was initially responsive but would not initiate contact. Anyhow, on Friday night she asked what I was doing around 10PM and I waited a while to respond and vaguely said I had just finished a late dinner. Next morning she continued to ask about what I was doing so I said I went on a date (I really didn't, just wanted to see if she would be mad). Ever since then she has not been talking to me at all. Coincidentally, the reason I even told her I was on a date was due to a thread I had found on this site saying how powerful of a tool jealousy is and that letting a woman know you are seeing other women will heighten interest very quickly. I also came across the whole concept of "No Contact" and have pledged not to contact her either, however I was enjoying the leverage of responding to her texts however I wanted. Now she isn't talking to me at all. It definitely burnt her, but I hope it didn't drive her away. I am thinking to continue no-contact is the best course of action here.

What I really want to know is if you guys think telling her I was on a date was a useful move and how far to really go with the whole jealousy plot. I know it creates value, etc, but some girls will not bother if they think you are with someone else due to their own ego. Thoughts?
 
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"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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betheman

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she was interested until you said you were on a date!!
guys have a tendency to be explicit, honest...if they know anoter woman is involved, they will seethe, resent, plot, scheme ..or f cuck another guy, anyway, you wont know.

you should have been vague "had dinner, it went on until late, you know how it is" let her mind wander..

as for jealousy...Im not sure women have jealousy the way men think they do, they are more proud than men, more stubborn and when it comes to guys, far more competative. it appears as jealousy, im not sure it is, its more competition, loss, lessening of ones own worth as a result. men are more jealous than women, women couch their competition, loss as jealousy
 

Bokanovsky

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JBB84 said:
however I was enjoying the leverage of responding to her texts however I wanted. Now she isn't talking to me at all. It definitely burnt her, but I hope it didn't drive her away.
What "leverage"? She had already dumped and was trying to keep you as an orbiter. Once you said you were dating someone else, she figured you were a lost cause (as far being a potential orbiter). If this girl actually wanted to be you friend instead of trying to use you for personal validation, she would not have reacted that way.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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JBB84

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I appreciate the advice. To UPDATE: She contacted me on Friday (yesterday) asking how everything was going. I chose to respond, and she ended up telling me that she had no plans for Friday night. We hung out, went out to dinner, I slept at her place and we did not hook up. This morning we went out to breakfast and I left afterwards. She asked about the girl I "went out with" and I didn't give her any info, I played it cool, and after I left she sent me several texts. She has no idea what I am doing tonight, and I know it bothers her. I think I am going to be her friend at a distance for now - being that we have mutual friends and will have run ins eventually.

The leverage I was talking about was that she was always initiating conversation and I was able to steer it in which ever way I chose to. I don't know if you have read my past posts but this girl and I have mutual friends and a history of hooking up for years off and on. I am keeping my options open but this little project with her keeps me on my feet. She is a solid 10, looks and status wise.
 

betheman

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JBB84 said:
I appreciate the advice. To UPDATE: She contacted me on Friday (yesterday) asking how everything was going. I chose to respond, and she ended up telling me that she had no plans for Friday night. We hung out, went out to dinner, I slept at her place and we did not hook up.
why not? she isnt putting you in the friend zone, you are doing it yourself, if your going to be shot down at least be shot down over the target
 

scrouds

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make the ho say no. Make her keep saying no till someone leaves or you get the lay.
 
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