"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Good approach???

pg5781

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A little background first…..

This new gym has opened up near my apartment so I’ve been going there since its grand opening in January. When I first started, I noticed this HB8.5 who works there as a sales rep. I usually don’t like to pick up chicks at the gym since I go there to get my workout in and not for the social aspect of it, so I never went for an approach.

Anyway, so my friend who also goes there, began dating a girl whose friends with this HB8.5. He told me that the HB8.5 has complained to his new girlfriend that she cant find a guy and that all the guys she meets are jerks, etc. So one day my friend and his girlfriend are at the gym and they tell her about me and say that she should meet me (at this time I didn’t know what they were doing). So they have this computer system at the gym where they have a picture of each member for security reasons so the HB8.5 asked them my name so she can look at my picture.

A couple of days later I’m at the gym working out with my friend and he tells me that he wants to hook me up with the HB8.5. He told me that he showed her my picture and that she said I was hot and she noticed me from back when I started. He said he will introduce me to her and I said fine, but he recently got a new job and hasn’t been going to the gym at the same time as me so im on my own with the approach.

This was last week and I haven’t seen her since then so I haven’t made the approach. I’m sure I will see her this week and I want to talk to her. Tell me what you guys think of this (remember, we have never spoken to each other):

Me: Hey how’s it going
Her: hi (or whatever)
Me: So I hear you’ve been a) dying to meet me or b) dying to talk to me (said with a sly smirk)
Her: (either laughs, makes a playful response, or slaps me across the face)

Do you guys think this is a good approach or does it come off as trying too hard??? I’ve used this twice in similar situations before with success, bc it usually sets a playful tone to the conversation and makes it seem like she is chasing me. I think this might work even better in this situation, bc the interest is there and we both know that our friends are trying to set us up. Do you guys have any other suggestions that are better??
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Reach

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IF she's already attracted to you, just walk over to her and start talking about anything. Don't mention your freind, don't even assume any knowlege about her. If you just start talking to someone like you've been in a conversation with them they react quite well. Try it. Then just say, "It'd be cool to hangout sometime. I know a place..."
 

yunghova35

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Originally posted by Reach
IF she's already attracted to you, just walk over to her and start talking about anything. Don't mention your freind, don't even assume any knowlege about her. If you just start talking to someone like you've been in a conversation with them they react quite well. Try it.
excellent
 

pg5781

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Thanks for the reply. I understand what you mean but that’s where I have a problem with an approach. It makes me more nervous at first when I’m trying to make normal conversation during the approach. When I approach with the example I gave in the first post, it relieves the tension on both sides and makes the conversation flow a lot better. Do you guys think my approach in the first post is too forward or too aggressive??
 

squirrels

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If she wants to meet you, and she told your friend that, as soon as you come up to her, she's gonna KNOW why you're there. And she's ALREADY expressed interest. Just flow, man. Relax, turn up the charm, and FLOW. And get them digits. ;)
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

Reach

Don Juan
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You seem like a cool guy and I appreciate where your coming from with nerves.

But all you have to do is go other near her in a confident manner, either directly or indirectly, then say something like "Hows it going?" Ever watch Joey in freinds? Your in his position.
 
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