"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Gone Cold?

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MartyMcFly

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So I've been seeing this girl... And well I'm not sure how to put this, a while back I expressed that I would like to make our relationship exclusive to eachother and she said she isn't ready for that yet since her last bf.. blah blah whatever other bs girls sell you when they turn you down, we keep seeing eachother and everything is going great, then... like 2 days ago, I hear nothing from her at all, no calls no texts, nothing. I sent out a feeler and she'd respond as if nothing was wrong? I'm probably overanalyzing it but I don't know. What should I do? Should I go dark and see what happens or just chalk it up as she was busy.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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trrush

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stop trying to get girls into relationships, that's their job, to get you into a relationship.
This is what happens when guys try to take the chic role.
if your gut is telling you something's not right, then it probably isn't. but what you gunna do? you cant force her, so you might as well occupy yourself with someone/thing else.
 
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Iceberg

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trrush said:
stop trying to get girls into relationships, that's their job, to get you into a relationship.
This is what happens when guys try to take the chic role.
if your gut is telling you something's not right, then it probably isn't. but what you gunna do? you cant force her, so you might as well occupy yourself with someone/thing else.
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Exactly. If the sex is good and she's showing up to dates when you ask her to, then there's no need to try to pin a girl into a "title".

And if the sex isn't good or she's not showing up when you ask her out (or being disrespectful), then you should have dumped her anyway.

No good comes from a man asking the girl about their "relationship status". It's just not our role.
 
bigneil

bigneil

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"A while back I expressed that I would like to make our relationship exclusive to eachother"

A man should never ask a woman to be exclusive. The woman needs to ask, otherwise the man will never know. Also, the woman always has more options so she is giving up more in a way. There are many other reasons for this but it's a good rule of thumb.

Sadly, it's most likely not a coincidence that she vanished after saying she won't be exclusive.

It's time for No Contact for about 2 weeks or until she contacts you 3 straight times.
 
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MartyMcFly

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Sounds like a plan guys. Thanks for the advice. I knew better than to pin the title. I guess I got impatient. I'll give the No contact thing a shot.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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LoneWolf

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cool, interesting thread... just what i was looking for. yeah i wasn't sure myself about this but i had a feeling us guys are not meant to do that. i got the whole sex, girl showing up to dates thing happening with my girl atm so i'm just gonna leave it be.
 
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crazyboy

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Yeah i was in this situation once i had everything going good. Until i was like where is this going. The minute that insecurity came out mouth everything went downhill. I had this girl in palm of my hand too smh. You need to start going no contact or contacting her only once a week like when you first started dating. So she can miss you and want to hang out with you. This when plate theory come in. Because your are going devople a oneits, so going have to find something else to put your attentions , while your try to get back with girl you really want.
 
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BadNews

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You sound really REALLY desperate and needy to me...and probably to her as well. THIS IS A HUGE TURN OFF FOR WOMEN! STOP RIGHT NOW! You should NEVER EVER bring up 'where the relationship is going', that is HER job.

Also "like 2 days ago, I hear nothing from her at all, no calls no texts, nothing". So you don't hear from her for a day or two? Who gives a crap? If shes into you, she'll call. You can't force it on her. Maybe she was busy, maybe she is sick of you, maybe she was testing you to see exactly how needy you are.

You need to take a breath, and just relax. Maybe grab yourself a glass of water. Don't force things, or it will only end poorly for you as you'll only push her away. Remain calm and collected, and let things play out how they play out!
 
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MartyMcFly

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BadNews said:
You sound really REALLY desperate and needy to me...and probably to her as well. THIS IS A HUGE TURN OFF FOR WOMEN! STOP RIGHT NOW! You should NEVER EVER bring up 'where the relationship is going', that is HER job.

Also "like 2 days ago, I hear nothing from her at all, no calls no texts, nothing". So you don't hear from her for a day or two? Who gives a crap? If shes into you, she'll call. You can't force it on her. Maybe she was busy, maybe she is sick of you, maybe she was testing you to see exactly how needy you are.

You need to take a breath, and just relax. Maybe grab yourself a glass of water. Don't force things, or it will only end poorly for you as you'll only push her away. Remain calm and collected, and let things play out how they play out!
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While this may be harsh. I appreciate it. I guess I lost my way when I got involved with her. I'll take your guys advice because it's worked for me in the past. Thanks again.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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