"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Going out to eat...

Omen

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Francisco d'Anconia said:
Assuming first date and all, I pay, unless she offers. Now I may give subtle hints, to see what happens, but IMO you should pay for the first date, or at least offer and see what happens.

Usually i've found that after that, things get split. Or at least in previous relationships, we've both done our share and i've never had a problem with it. I dont think you need to over analyze something simple as who pays unless there is some kind of problem as to where she is only after dinner, money, etc etc. If I was to sense this, it would be a different story, and i'd play it by the person. What ever the case, what ever I have done, has never been a problem, and it works, so I stick to it.

Regardless if that post ever happened to someone (Ken785) that's a raw deal, and just :eek: I dont think I could do that.

That needs to be an episode of PUNKED
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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Francisco d'Anconia

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Omen said:
Assuming first date and all, I pay, unless she offers. Now I may give subtle hints, to see what happens, but IMO you should pay for the first date, or at least offer and see what happens.

Usually i've found that after that, things get split. Or at least in previous relationships, we've both done our share and i've never had a problem with it. I dont think you need to over analyze something simple as who pays unless there is some kind of problem as to where she is only after dinner, money, etc etc. If I was to sense this, it would be a different story, and i'd play it by the person. What ever the case, what ever I have done, has never been a problem, and it works, so I stick to it.

Regardless if that post ever happened to someone (Ken785) that's a raw deal, and just :eek: I dont think I could do that.

That needs to be an episode of PUNKED
Alright, you explained how you typically handle things during a relationship but I missed exactly why you feel that you have to pay with someone you aren't involved. Earlier you said that the guy pays; why?
 

Omen

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Francisco d'Anconia said:
Alright, you explained how you typically handle things during a relationship but I missed exactly why you feel that you have to pay with someone you aren't involved. Earlier you said that the guy pays; why?
Well if i'm not totally involved I wont pay for the whole thing. In fact, funny story...

I went out with a girl in early Sept. We went to the bookstore and sat in the area that actually is the place they make coffee and baked goods and all of that.

First time we met, and it was a mutual meet.

I didnt even mention anything about coffee or food, or ice cream next door. We chatted, I didnt get a good vibe from her (maybe cause she said she had no direction in life) and I didnt spend a DIME that whole time. I spent gas to get there which was only 1mile away, and she met ME there which took her 30min.

So in that case I didnt feel I needed to buy her anything. Maybe to some that sounds kind of raw, but I just knew it was going to end before it really got started and I was out nothing.

I had a blind date once a buddy set up and I paid for dinner cause HE set it up. If his wife would have set her friend up with me, I wouldn't have offered, and paid my own and let her pay her own.

Most the time i've just done the dinner date when i've been dating someone, and not just met them, so i've never really had someone I met, said...lets go out to eat and then done that. They've all been girlfriends first except the one blind date.
 

Serialized3

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Bible_Belt said:
I try to only take a girl places that I like to go, including restaurants. If I am having fun and doing what I like, then paying does not seem so AFC.
:yes:

The best part about this post is that earlier today I found the receipt from the most expensive dinner date I have ever been on (153 dollars).

Anyways, ancient DJ wisdom would dictate that dinner dates are cliche and tend to be boring, and I would agree as far as the first few dates. Maybe after that, you should bring the woman into your world and take her to a couple of the places where you actually enjoy eating.

And of course, on the first date, whoever made the invitation, which should have been you, pays. But it's cheap if you just go for a walk in the park. :D
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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Omen said:
...I didnt even mention anything about coffee or food, or ice cream next door. We chatted, I didnt get a good vibe from her (maybe cause she said she had no direction in life) and I didnt spend a DIME that whole time. I spent gas to get there which was only 1mile away, and she met ME there which took her 30min.....
It's situations like this that shows it's the quality of the company that is more impressive than the venue (if you aren't talking to a serial dater). Still guy's go out of their way to find the perfect place to take a woman on a first date (covered by them of course :rolleyes:). It hasn't even bee determined if they will even see each other afterwards.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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