"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Giving women attention

Redwolf

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How much attention should you give a woman you are interested in vs a woman you are already having sex with. Obviously you don't want to be needy but what should the difference be?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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KindredSpiritzz

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I don't know, I notice if im not attentive enough they will drift away if we haven't met yet. I suppose theres a ton of other guys texting them so you gotta stay in their line of sight. If your having sex with them I find they initiate contact almost every day and you gotta respond or they get miffed. I never understood the dating advice to only use your phone for making dates, I don't see how that's feasible.
Im kinda confused myself.
 

synecdoche

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You should be the one pursuing before sex, she should be the one after sex. (Not chasing)

About the texting, you can't be an ******* who never responds to texts but be busy. Don't chat with her over text. If she's showing you high interest and starts initiating more with texting you it's OK to initiate once in a while as well. Don't send needy texts, just show her you were thinking of her. And keep it short.

Ideally the first months of dating her the dynamic should shift from you initiating most of the time to her initiating all the time.

Be careful with using humor over text, however callback humor is great unless she isn't clever and doesn't get it.

Don't act like a robot who only texts for logistics and avoids all conversation.
 

bcude

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The difference is that a woman you haven't had sex with is the lowest of your priorities and you should act accordingly. A woman you're having sex with you proceed as usual: reward good behavior, punish bad behavior (with your attention)
 

Redwolf

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Attention is definitely the coin of girl land. Knowing how to properly use it seems to be key. I was curious of how everyone was handling it. It does seem if you put your attention at zero they loose intrest but I've also had issues with women being just about the attention and nothing else. So how to use the right amount on women you like but haven't slept with.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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BackInTheGame78

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It depends, there is no right or wrong answer and HOW you go about it makes a HUGE difference. If you are needy and desperate and it comes across that way it doesn't matter. If you are fun and interesting you can ratchet up interest via texting quite a bit especially after the first few dates.
 
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