"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Giving her the gift of missing you

The_Reaper

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Someone once said: "The longest absence is less perilous to love than the terrible trials of incessant proximity".

This, in my experience, is VERY true.

I would be interested to hear your thoughts on this. What, for example, is the best strategy when you're going on holidays with the girl, or - for whatever other reason - you have to be in each other's company without a break for a very long time.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Lexington

Master Don Juan
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Always have your own activities to do. Hell even if you live together, you should keep yourself busy so that your time is scarce. If you're a successful, motivated person, chances are you'll have to keep busy with work a lot of the time. Then you should also have some hobbies that don't include her. Also, make sure you spend time with the boys. When you have a lot on your plate, your time is more valuable.

It keeps things better for you as well. I don't care who you're dating/married to. No one is so interesting that you relish their company 100% of the time.
 

zekko

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What, for example, is the best strategy when you're going on holidays with the girl, or - for whatever other reason - you have to be in each other's company without a break for a very long time.
If you're going on a holiday with her I'd say enjoy each other's company.
I agree with Lex that it's always best for you each to have some of your own interests. But if you're going away together, go ahead and enjoy it. It's not like a mathematical formula where the less time you spend together the more you enjoy each other. At some point there is a diminishing return.

And of course, it depends on the person, and the couple. My current girlfriend and I spend a lot of time together, it doesn't seem to bother us any.
When I was married, I actually think our relationship started to fall apart when we started to work different shifts. Too little togetherness in that case.
 
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