"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Girls you choose to meet vs. girls you happen to meet

Dysfunctional

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After reading a couple of posts in the forum I noticed that picking up girls seems to be a big part of DJ-ing. I came to this forum because I could see that this stuff isn't bull, I thought back on situations (I have something of an eidetic memory) and re-evaluated them with these new theories, realizing that they should apply and then tested them. I know it's for real.

Usually, when I meet girls, I do so under a different pretext that the usual. Then, after saying Hi and maybe talking for a bit, I can usually tell if I'm into her or not (Girl's a real person now, instead of just a pretty face), and if so: In what way? I just take it from there, simple and plain.

Then, about picking up girls:
I was at the club tonight and thought it fit to try and pick up some girls with my new and improved skills (actually just my new grown cojones :D )

Long story short: I never did. I'm a big stinking coward. I had plenty of opportunity. What I tried to do was to make EC and wave them over. I couldn't even make EC, it seemed.

The thing is that I don't *need* to pick up girls to meet them, I meet my share anyway. So I wonder if there's anyting in doing it other that that.

I'd love to have it as a skill and as soon as I've scraped up enough confidence to do so I'll do it.

Right now I'm mostly about trying to smile at every person I talk to, meet or make EC with - And not to look down when I make EC with someone (I almost never used to smile and almost always looked away) It seems to make people more friendly towards you and that's good, not only with girls.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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darth yoda

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The thing is that I don't *need* to pick up girls to meet them, I meet my share anyway. So I wonder if there's anyting in doing it other that that.
It sounds like you're making excuses, just develop the ability to pick-up, and you won't have to leave things to chance.
 

satyriasis

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Picking up & talking to women or people in general isn't something you should HAVE to do.

It should be something that you should WANT to do. Don't force yourself to talk to women.
 

Dysfunctional

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Originally posted by satyriasis
Picking up & talking to women or people in general isn't something you should HAVE to do.

It should be something that you should WANT to do. Don't force yourself to talk to women.
It's not the talking I have a problem with, just the actual "picking up", as it's under the pretense of scoring a # or more.

I guess my problem is that I just can't be casual when picking up, otherwise I'm great at keeping cool, cause there's no agenda. Only if I want there to be one, then I'm in control.

So I just have to keep casual and in control. Now how the hell do I do that?
 

TxCowboy

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Originally posted by Dysfunctional
After reading a couple of posts in the forum I noticed that picking up girls seems to be a big part of DJ-ing. I came to this forum because I could see that this stuff isn't bull, I thought back on situations (I have something of an eidetic memory) and re-evaluated them with these new theories, realizing that they should apply and then tested them. I know it's for real.

Usually, when I meet girls, I do so under a different pretext that the usual. Then, after saying Hi and maybe talking for a bit, I can usually tell if I'm into her or not (Girl's a real person now, instead of just a pretty face), and if so: In what way? I just take it from there, simple and plain.

Then, about picking up girls:
I was at the club tonight and thought it fit to try and pick up some girls with my new and improved skills (actually just my new grown cojones :D )

Long story short: I never did. I'm a big stinking coward. I had plenty of opportunity. What I tried to do was to make EC and wave them over. I couldn't even make EC, it seemed.

The thing is that I don't *need* to pick up girls to meet them, I meet my share anyway. So I wonder if there's anyting in doing it other that that.

I'd love to have it as a skill and as soon as I've scraped up enough confidence to do so I'll do it.

Right now I'm mostly about trying to smile at every person I talk to, meet or make EC with - And not to look down when I make EC with someone (I almost never used to smile and almost always looked away) It seems to make people more friendly towards you and that's good, not only with girls.
Dont even think about all this cr@p dude. Just relax and talk to whoever because you are a social person who just wants to meet new people and enjoy life w/o caring about the consequences ....
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Dysfunctional

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Re: Re: Girls you choose to meet vs. girls you happen to meet

Originally posted by TxCowboy
Dont even think about all this cr@p dude. Just relax and talk to whoever because you are a social person who just wants to meet new people and enjoy life w/o caring about the consequences ....
That's some good advice man. Thanks!
 
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