"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Girls with problems

ocbeachbum

Don Juan
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I know it sounds crazy but im attracted to girls with problems. What I mean is like they have been abused by past boyfriends, family, etc or having a drug/alohol problem. I dont know why but they like me too. Its like im the comfort that they are looking for. Where can I even begin to look for girls like this?
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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TillTheEndOfTime

Master Don Juan
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Don't be stupid. Don't be a hero. Hooking up with girls like these is setting yourself up for disaster. Unless you want a dating life from hell, stay away from these girls.
 

biker_gixxer

Master Don Juan
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to each his own bro. girls like this are a dime a dozen, you'll run into a girl with some sort of issue sooner or later.
 

spidersense

Don Juan
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Originally posted by ocbeachbum
I know it sounds crazy but im attracted to girls with problems. What I mean is like they have been abused by past boyfriends, family, etc or having a drug/alohol problem. I dont know why but they like me too. Its like im the comfort that they are looking for. Where can I even begin to look for girls like this?
question to ask yourself: were you raised in an alcoholic or drug addicted home. Seriously. family members of alcoholics tend to play certain roles in the family, one of which is called the "hero" Watch the movie "Under The Influence" with Andy Griffith and Keanu Reeves, it's one of the best movies for demonstrating the different roles that family members play. Andy Griffith's daughter in that movie was what was called the "hero" she was the one that always tried to get him to stop drinking, she would put water in his alcohol and other things.

Seriously, you don't want an alcoholic or drug addict, not even a truely clean and sober one. The give bad genes.

One more thing, if you are from an alcoholic family(this may not be imediate family, it could be your gradfather or even great grand father, the behavior patterns are still passed on even if the family members don't drink), and you don't drink yourself, go to Al-Anon. There is a lot of crap that goes on in these peoples minds that they are not aware of that makes them this way. Fix that junk and I'm willing to bet that you will start attracting different types on women.
 

spidersense

Don Juan
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oh, and if you study psychology you learn that people that play these roles in families will go out and meet people that play these roles in families. You tend to be attracted to your upbringing.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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