Girls with boyfriends

[guerreiro]

Hey guys, I really wouldn't mind your help on this one.

See, there's a girl I worked with a few months last year, well, she seemed attracted to me and all, but she had a boyfriend. Well even so, she sent me some signals, but at the same time she was into her bf (in an obsessive-girly kinda way), so I thought I'd be better off getting out of the picture, since i was starting to get feelings for her.

Well it worked, and I've had a lot of success picking up other women since.

BTW, this guy cheated on her twice, and she knows it. He begged and she took him back.

Anyway, this week she sent me an email saying how she misses me, how she likes me and all that BS. We've never been friends, mind you, just a brief convo here and there (well, some of the times it was about her relationship).

well, i sent her an email back and i said well lets get in touch and we met at the beach yesterday.

i admit i probably screwed up a bit. i started too slow, and at a point i was almost giving up on hitting on her, up to the point she said things like:
- "well im sad because i'm still seeing him, but i dont know how its gonna end"
- "for example, if you and i started seeing each other today, well it would be really good in the beginning, but after one month..."

and things like that. i didn't expect it, and i replied with things like "well you shouldn't think that just because one relationship didn't work, others won't" and general BS like that to try and get a kiss. I almost got it, but it was getting late and I had to go rehearse, so there was no time left.

Well, I'm thinking I could've done so much better, I feel like she's giving me a lot of signs, and I didn't use them very well. I don't mind being used for revenge purposes, and I have a feeling that she wants to go from him to me, and she's testing me to see if I'm the right candidate. I suppose I'm failing these tests so far.

She's probably seeing this guy this weekend, and I'm thinking on calling her on tuesday, and ask her out to do something and get what I want. That is, if I still have time left.

Any opinions, suggestions on this one? I don't like this feeling I'm starting to get (ONE-ITIS).

 

[jama]

Hello.

I don’t like the idea of going out a chick with boyfriend. It happens to me. I met a girl in my college. She was hot and cool. I asked her out, and, our first date, she mentioned something about her boyfriend, WOOW. I didn’t go out with her again.

See, if a chick doesn’t want to stay in her relationship, she should leave but not cheat. It seems like her boyfriend is a “player”, and knows what is he doing. You cant steal her from him unless you show her that you are a “real man” who don’t date a girl who has a boyfriend.

Stop seeing her. Let her know if she wants you, she should broke up with her boyfriend first.

Good luck

 

[backbreaker]

two things:

1) why would you go with someone who cheated on their BF to be with you? You know they are a cheat.


2) She is using you as either a) emotional tampon or b) revenge.

Either way, run. I have no problem if she BREAKS UP with him to be with you,b ut she is stringing you along like a puppet

 

[jiro77]

guerreiro,

I decided to post because I was in a similar situation awhile ago. First of all if you think you're getting a case of oneits, you should take a step back again, let youself cool off, and go after other girls.

Otherwise do the following...

#1 Be a challenge, try to be mysterious, and keep her off balance. This is much easier to accomplish if you have other potential girls in your bullpen to play with. Read the bible, it gives great tips on this subject. (most important)

#2 Concentrate on just having fun with her. You both are aware that she has a boyfriend, so in this case she's the one who will have to make the first move. If you try to force it, the relationship might blow up in your face, and you're left with nothing. Try to be ****y/funny, carefree when you are around her, and let her know how much fun your having doing other things when you're not around her.

#3 Be patient, this type of thing takes time because she has to evaluate you over him. Right now he seems to be treating her poorly, younger girls seem to love this for some reason. Have you heard the phrase, "Women are like mike monkeys, as soon as the have a firm grip on another branch the grab it and let go of the other"? Their relationships work the same way. If she does dump him and go for you, then you're also left with possibly having to deal with the ex-boyfriend. She'll also need time to get him out of her system. It is especially tougher for her if this guy was her first.

#4 To pass her tests, act like anything she says or does will not affect you. You have to be willing to walk away at the drop of a dime.

I don not promote going after a girl with a boyfriend, but in this case it seems like the boyfriend is taking her for granted. I agree with the other posts, don't let her string you along. Just be objective when persuing this relationship, and go into it not expecting much out of it. Hope for the best, and expect the worse, so to speak. If you can do this, use her as practice, and just see what happens. If she's going out with some other guy this weekend let her go while you should be going out and having your own fun. Go out and have fun, and when you talk to her again let her know how much fun you had. If you do get with her, the game doesn't end and it won't be easy. You have to remain a challenge, and still be mysterious. (see #1) If you do go forward with this relationship, and it is hard on you back off without it ending badly. Also, in my experience, keep off of the email. It is much harder to keep the mystery going. Use the phone to setup times together, and keep the convo short I have to say it is much easier going after single women, but good luck with this.

"Don't hate the player, hate the game" - Jamie Foxx

 

[DJ_Dork]

If you're thinking about going out with a girl, always make sure she is single and has been single from her last relationship for at least 3-6 months. Ask her when was the last time she dated, and if she said 2 weeks ago, then ask how many guys have you gone out with on a date since breaking up with her ex. If she says anything more than once per month, NEXT.

Why? If there's anything I don't like is a girl who is stringing her current bf along to find someone better (You do not want to be that person to "rescue/take" her away, be a man) and a girl who is a constant serial dater.

 

[Dust 2 Dust]

Jiro gave you some excellent advice.

The next time you hang out with her I would give her the kiss test. Then you'll know right away if she's stringing you along or not.

 

[guerreiro]

Wow, guys, you gave me great advice; specially you Jiro. Sometimes we just seem to get into "nice guy" mode and forget some basic stuff. Thanks!!