I have a friend that admits that she has two guys she dates. When she isn't dating one, she dates the other. One of the guys cheated on her, but they are back together and claims they love each other and worked things out. Also she told me that her relationships usually only last a month (whether thats true or not, I don't know). Attention wh0re, bpd, or just plain scary?
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Girls that go back to thier ex's
- Thread starter jmeredi
- Start date
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Doesn't matter what she is.
I'm really curious as to why it is that some people want to know what the girl is. People are weird creatures. They do many odd things. Some things you might consider evil, some things you might consider beyond the order of nature. But that's that. It's not like the HBs of our species are 'angelic' beings.
Plus the people you 'think' are normal or good could in all actuality be in fact a sadistic psycho who likes to masturbate in their own feces.
So..... about girls, I don't care what they are. They could be so many things. I just wonder whether they would like to fvck me. In which case, I've got to find that out from her. Get it?
I'm really curious as to why it is that some people want to know what the girl is. People are weird creatures. They do many odd things. Some things you might consider evil, some things you might consider beyond the order of nature. But that's that. It's not like the HBs of our species are 'angelic' beings.
Plus the people you 'think' are normal or good could in all actuality be in fact a sadistic psycho who likes to masturbate in their own feces.
So..... about girls, I don't care what they are. They could be so many things. I just wonder whether they would like to fvck me. In which case, I've got to find that out from her. Get it?
But then other people's answers are meaningless. If you want opinions, it would be better if you could give more details so that the people giving you some answers can actually do it and not feel like they're totally assuming details about the whole thing.
I suppose you're just curious as to how others would interpret your situation. That's fair. If you're still looking for some answers, try mentioning whether she fvcks these guys everytime she meets them, whether she sees herself having a LTR with any of these guys she gets with, whether she seems confident with what she's doing with these two guys or whether she seems hesitant or confused with her situation. Stuff like these would help in judging whether she's just plain dumb and confused or whether she knows what she wants and she's letting herself loose.
I suppose you're just curious as to how others would interpret your situation. That's fair. If you're still looking for some answers, try mentioning whether she fvcks these guys everytime she meets them, whether she sees herself having a LTR with any of these guys she gets with, whether she seems confident with what she's doing with these two guys or whether she seems hesitant or confused with her situation. Stuff like these would help in judging whether she's just plain dumb and confused or whether she knows what she wants and she's letting herself loose.
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Tell me the truth, are you the "other" guy?Originally posted by jmeredi
she seems more or less confused.
I'm Joe Dirt
Master Don Juan
Well what happens sometimes is girls delude themselves into thinking things are going to be different when they actually aren't.
I have come accross this many times, and it has also been a proven weapon of influence identified by Robert Cialidini in "influence: the psychology of persuasion".
Sometimes our thought process can be really screwed with. See, what can happen is we think we don't want something anymore unless a condition is met. For example a girl won't go back to a guy unless he quits drinking.
Now what can happen is he can pretend he quit drinking, so that the condition is met, and she will be happy convinced things are different.
And here's the kicker: the feeling that things are different and the actions that took place because the conditions were met REMAIN SO even if the original demand is withdrawn.
For example, a few weeks into the relationship he can start drinking again and she will probably not leave him for it.
Why? Who knows! Its the way our brain is wired. Sometimes we make decisions based on certain conditions and we stick to those decisions even if the original conditions are pulled back.
This explains why girls have problems in relationships, break up because of them, then the guy sweet talks them or they "work out" their problems (when in fact theyve just put a temporary band aid on them) and they get back together, only to have the same problems later.
Rinse, Repeat.
Now that you're aware of this psychological weapon of influence, feel free to use it. A lot of people already do without even thinking about it.
I have come accross this many times, and it has also been a proven weapon of influence identified by Robert Cialidini in "influence: the psychology of persuasion".
Sometimes our thought process can be really screwed with. See, what can happen is we think we don't want something anymore unless a condition is met. For example a girl won't go back to a guy unless he quits drinking.
Now what can happen is he can pretend he quit drinking, so that the condition is met, and she will be happy convinced things are different.
And here's the kicker: the feeling that things are different and the actions that took place because the conditions were met REMAIN SO even if the original demand is withdrawn.
For example, a few weeks into the relationship he can start drinking again and she will probably not leave him for it.
Why? Who knows! Its the way our brain is wired. Sometimes we make decisions based on certain conditions and we stick to those decisions even if the original conditions are pulled back.
This explains why girls have problems in relationships, break up because of them, then the guy sweet talks them or they "work out" their problems (when in fact theyve just put a temporary band aid on them) and they get back together, only to have the same problems later.
Rinse, Repeat.
Now that you're aware of this psychological weapon of influence, feel free to use it. A lot of people already do without even thinking about it.
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
I'm Joe Dirt
Master Don Juan
Well if what you see happening is what I described earlier, you could simply point out to her that nothings really changed and ask her for the reasons she broke up with the guy and make her honestly assess whether or not those reasons are still in play.
Maybe even tell her about the weapon of influence and how it works, perhaps then she'll see that her situation is a textbook case of it and break her instinct and dump him.
But in order to make an assesment on whether or not this is happening you'd have to know her reasons for breaking up with the guy and the conditions under which they got back together.
Maybe even tell her about the weapon of influence and how it works, perhaps then she'll see that her situation is a textbook case of it and break her instinct and dump him.
But in order to make an assesment on whether or not this is happening you'd have to know her reasons for breaking up with the guy and the conditions under which they got back together.
MacDiddy
Master Don Juan
Why do you guys care what her $lutty history is... If she is decent, game her and then satisfy your manly desires by blowin your load on her face...
Let the next AFC she goes out with deal with it...
Let the next AFC she goes out with deal with it...