Girls fresh out of relationships

Bible_Belt

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Said she just got out of a 3 year relationship and didn't really want to be approached.

So don't do an "approach." Just sit down and talk to the girl. Let her talk about her old relationship if she wants; that's what's on her mind anyway.

Even if she tells you flat-out, "I just went through a break up and I'm not looking to meet anyone," don't let her establish that frame. My response is something like OMG, I so_totally_understand. Then I'll sit down next to her and say Now tell me everything. I'll end up spending a few hours being her "emotional tampon" as sosuave likes to call it, but I'll also end up fvcking her that night. And that happens because I can see her words for their real meaning. What she meant was, "I'm really vulnerable right now."
 

Petra

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Believe her when she says she doesn't want to be approached. Give her a few weeks. She's not ready yet but sounds like she's definitely interested. Don't come on too heavy
 

Solomon

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IMO dealing with these types is a waste of time unless you want to be her therapist
Even just to "smash" is not worth it these women will think it's cool to talk about their ex and that puts you in a different frame
I prefer women who are emotionally available

I remember recently was dealing with this cute blond older in her 40s
Who found out her ex was cheating everywhere
needless to say, it got awkward when making out and she said "I can't do anything I have to wait for my STD results" nothing wrong with that but it definitely did ruin the mood
 

BackInTheGame78

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Quick question-how do you handle girls fresh out of relationships that you wanna ask out?

Got a girl I met through some friends who is def a HB9 and real cool. We have been around each other like 3-4 times at the bars when we are with mutual friends. There's definitely some attraction and flirting every time.

Weird thing is I called her last Monday to see if she wanted to get a few drinks for happy hour that Wednesday. She never answered or got back to me so I was like whatever. So This past Friday rolls around and she texts me that she and her friends (some mutual) are going to a bar near me and out that night and I should join. I was going anyways for a friends bday so I told her I might make it up there. She approaches me there and we hang out and talk, take some shots and all. I never mentioned the call of course. She leaves and tells me where she's going (we were with a bunch of mutual friends bar hopping for a combined bday party). See her at the next bar and we talk some more. She approaches me more as I don't want to be a puppy (lesson learned through this site) and definitely don't follow her around like every other guy at the bar. Anyways night ends at a bar and I give her a ride home since I had plans the next day and couldn't get drunk. Had other people in the car but I overheard her telling my buddy she was unapproachable and her friend wasn't (he asked about one of her friends saying she was unapproachable). Said she just got out of a 3 year relationship and didn't really want to be approached.

Here's my question- anyone ever have this type who's freshly single and ask them out? I was gonna see if she wanted to get some drinks Wednesday but Idk if I should rush that and just keep hanging out with mutual friends and keep throwing in more kino and interest and save the ask out for a few weeks.

Thanks for the advice. This site is definitely helpful
Just know that you'll likely be the rebound guy and regardless of how into you she seems, it likely won't last for more than 6-8 months before she realizes she needs to take a break and/or wants something else
 

Solomon

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Just know that you'll likely be the rebound guy and regardless of how into you she seems, it likely won't last for more than 6-8 months before she realizes she needs to take a break and/or wants something else
In 2023 I give it 1 month tops a lot of these women hopping on D's faster than pepboys can change tires
 

tksniper

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DUUUUUUDE... I JUST put up this podcast today called "Stop Introducing Her to Your Friends So Soon," where I talk about WHY you shouldn't be trying to bring her around, or get to know her around, other people when you first start dating. (Click on the link in my signature to hear it).

Stop trying to hang around with her with friends - it's only going to make her view you as a friend. Instead, ask her out and see what she says. You don't have to be all heavy with it and go blabbing your feelings - just a simple "hey, I was going to go to (activity) and was hoping I could take you, let me know if you're interested." She'll either say "yes" or give you a plethora of excuses as to why she can't make it, i.e. "No." All this trying to flirt with her with other people around isn't going to help you. (Again, listen to the podcast, maaaan!)
Yeah man just ask her out like a real man. Get compliance or rejection and move on. Leave the hyper analysis to women. Women know intuitively if you haven’t escalated, you haven’t done anything at all. And the longer you wait, the weaker you look.
 

Murk

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If she’s a legit 9 and not some insta thot I wouldn’t care I’d make my move asap. Quality women don’t stay single for long, they want commitment, and quality girls get it.

I’m trying to find a hot, low body count woman to wife so I need one young and maybe just out of an LTR for that under 5 bodies territory. I don’t really see myself bagging a virgin so this is the next best thing. If she’s solid 9+ you have to act quick.
 

SW15

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Women are not single for long. There's even an argument that can be made that women are never truly single. A lot of women monkey branch. Married women will have affairs and file for divorce, moving on to the affair partner. Even if a woman doesn't have an affair within a non-marital relationship or marriage, she can start to line up prospect even before breaking up or filing for divorce. Also, a lot of women while not in a relationship have "situationships" or "FWBs" going on. Some are having semi regular one night stands.

It doesn't matter whether she's fresh out of a relationship or has had multiple months up to one year since her last long relationship. If you demonstrate higher value than other perceived options, she will go forward with you.

Additionally, a lot of women will use the "I just got out of a relationship line and don't want to see anyone new" line as a phony excuse. One woman at my gym did that to me many years ago. She had moved to the city where I lived 6 months earlier, so it is probable that her last relationship ended when she moved. Additionally, only a few weeks after she gave me that excuse, I saw her in a grocery store with another guy at her side. So she was completely full of crap with me. Liar! I had to see her a number of times until I think she switched gyms. I haven't seen her at my gym in many years so I think she moved on to another gym.
 

manfrombelow

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Girls fresh out of relationships are PERFECT as FVCK-BUDDIES.

But LTR-material? Hell no.
 
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