"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Girlfriend Issue - Infatuation Dying Down in LTR

Axcell

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 12, 2007
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Hey guys, going to make this as short as possible!
Been going out with a girl for a few months, things seemed to have been going good till about a week ago. Infatuation seems to be dying down between us, which I know marks the "Mature" stage in a relationship. There isn't too much in this forum about those in LTR's and how to KEEP a girl.

In short, our conversations are starting to die down, not too much to talk about anymore.

I have completely no problem in getting a girl, but keeping that chemistry alive seems to be a tough one.

One more thing:
NOW, there is also this minor problem which I want to address in the same topic (not going to bother making another topic for this.) But what do you do when your girlfriend acts differently in public than in private? Been going out with this girl who in private, acts very "lovey dovey" and very attached to me. In private she is very outgoing, etc. However, in public, and when around her friends, she doesn't do ANYTHING.

I know some girls dont want to appear as a sl*t in front of their friends, so they obviously wouldn't make out with their boyfriend in front of them. But my girl doesn't go so much as to give simple hugs, etc. Any idea how to handle this?

I should note. I have talked to her already about this, and her response was: "That's just the way I am."

Any advice would be great!
Axcell.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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dopexile

Don Juan
Joined
Apr 10, 2006
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Location
St. Louis, MO
Since when is a few months a LTR? Sounds more like a fling to me.

If you want to keep chemistry you need to be interesting and not predictable.

Do you act the same way around all of your family, friends, and coworkers? Do you act the same when you meet new people? Of course not, we have social masks that we use to adapt to situations. Public affection also can have huge cultural contexts.
 

mintxx

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 8, 2007
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446
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'Been going out with a girl for a few months, things seemed to have been going good till about a week ago. Infatuation seems to be dying down between us, which I know marks the "Mature" stage in a relationship.'

if you think 3 months is the 'mature' stage you are clearly dating a cardboard cutout. how the hell can you know someone after 3 months? are you both trapped in the same shipping container? see her once a week and spend your time doing things that you won't regret speding time on when you're facing your own death. then you might have more to talk about and do together.

'In short, our conversations are starting to die down, not too much to talk about anymore.'

this is a fairly common problem because most people don't actually do anything apart from buy things and watch tv. drop her and spend some time adding things to your life that give you and others something to talk about.
 

mintxx

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 8, 2007
Messages
446
Reaction score
9
'Been going out with a girl for a few months, things seemed to have been going good till about a week ago. Infatuation seems to be dying down between us, which I know marks the "Mature" stage in a relationship.'

if you think 3 months is the 'mature' stage you are clearly dating a cardboard cutout. how the hell can you know someone after 3 months? are you both trapped in the same shipping container? see her once a week and spend your time doing things that you won't regret speding time on when you're facing your own death. then you might have more to talk about and do together.

'In short, our conversations are starting to die down, not too much to talk about anymore.'

this is a fairly common problem because most people don't actually do anything apart from buy things and watch tv. drop her and spend some time adding things to your life that give you and others something to talk about.
 

mintxx

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 8, 2007
Messages
446
Reaction score
9
'Been going out with a girl for a few months, things seemed to have been going good till about a week ago. Infatuation seems to be dying down between us, which I know marks the "Mature" stage in a relationship.'

if you think 3 months is the 'mature' stage you are clearly dating a cardboard cutout. how the hell can you know someone after 3 months? are you both trapped in the same shipping container? see her once a week and spend your time doing things that you won't regret speding time on when you're facing your own death. then you might have more to talk about and do together.

'In short, our conversations are starting to die down, not too much to talk about anymore.'

this is a fairly common problem because most people don't actually do anything apart from buy things and watch tv. drop her and spend some time adding things to your life that give you and others something to talk about.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

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