"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

girlfriend is stressed..how to deal with it?

frivolousz21

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 11, 2004
Messages
3,151
Reaction score
16
Age
44
Location
belleville, il
I am gonna try to give her space..even tho she doenst seem to want it...tonight she broke down and cried talking to me about her problems..I was comferting..but also telling her that she needs to worry more about her life and not making everyone happy all the time..if its not making her happy.

but she told me that it didnt pertain to me...and that she has no intentions of losing me over this..actually she didnt even bring it up...we were talking and I said somethjing about something and said I dont plan on breaking up with u now..she said i dont either...so what should I do to help her with this? im not a needy *****..so thats not an issue..I think she just needs sleep....and space from all her family and friends.

what is the best thing I can do to make it easiest on her?

I am probably just gonna be relaxed with her..I told her if this affects me..then I wont want to do it..as in be with her..I laid my line down to what I can do..but she seems that she wants me around..and talks to me...so whats some ideas on how to keep things going and not pressure her??
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

Read more...

Trance

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 23, 2004
Messages
590
Reaction score
0
Age
45
Location
Portugal
You: I'm taking you out. What you're needing is going out with me and having a great time! Lets party
 

TDOT

Don Juan
Joined
Sep 24, 2004
Messages
139
Reaction score
0
Location
I used a wrench
You: "You need time, really. So its over until you make up your mind... call me when you are ready"
 

frivolousz21

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 11, 2004
Messages
3,151
Reaction score
16
Age
44
Location
belleville, il
You: "You need time, really. So its over until you make up your mind... call me when you are ready"
this has nothign to do with me...it has to do with her moving an hour from home the first time in her life..she is home sick.and she doenst have the balls to let go..and accept change..as in she tries to please everyone who wants some of her time..she complained about everyone.but she told me..that its remarkable that I dont smother her..but I have **** to do..:)

but I want to make this easy on her...any suggestions? also help her accept change
 

spukee

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 11, 2005
Messages
93
Reaction score
0
Age
43
Location
somewhere south of Canada
Unfortunately no one's going to be able to give you any definitive advice - moving away from home effects different people in different ways. Her being homesick is something she's going to have to deal with on her own terms, and while it might be hard for you to watch, you just have to accept that she'll come around eventually.

What you can do in the meantime is continue being supportive, and continue to focus on your own matters. She knows that eventually she'll have to accept the change and move forward; pressure to do so from you isn't going to move things along any quicker.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

frivolousz21

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 11, 2004
Messages
3,151
Reaction score
16
Age
44
Location
belleville, il
that is great advice spukee..that is..I can tell she is home sick..she has 2 days off tuesday and wednesday and she basically told me she is staying at home. and that..and she wants to see me tomorrow (monday) she seems like it on the phone..so im gonna be supportive and let her have her time to adjust to things....I wont let this go to waste..but im gonna go out and meet new girls jsut incace this falls threw..its only been a month or so..so why not? its not cheating if im not doing more than that..and if she comes around and gets adjusted to her new place..then its all good. I wont sit here and say that I dont want to lose this girl..I dont..and the last thing I want is to act like it..I care for her..want to make her happy by being me...whats some good advice? just stay busy with everythign else I have going on and give her space to get adjusted?
 
Top