Girl wont except my fighter lifestyle

[Bas Rutten]

The new women in my life says today she can't except my fighter lifestyle. I am so stressed today, and has caused me to miss training. She is new in my life, but was becoming a serious thing. She wasn't one of my typical bar fly girls that I get bored of. She didn't call me yesterday, and like a good guy I called her between my training sessions in my car. Tried to explain to her what it is like 4-6 weeks leading up to a fight, but rest of time fairly easy. Today calls and doesn't think we are in the same place in life. She's 31, me 26. I'm like, what does it matter, nothing will matter for 2-3 years anyway in a relationship. Your not going to get married or get a house together before than anyway. I figure, This sport and myself I will either be in a certain place within two years now that I am dedicated and know it is definately going somewhere and some financial success (between MMA and starting boxing career soon), or I won't and then can become a firefighter or cop or go back into military like she was talking to me about a few days ago. Just watched The Smashing Machine again, and I don't need those distractions. I told her I was upset she is making judgements before even watching my fights, or looking up anything on net or anything. She calls it "my boxing thing". I figured, fudge it were done whatever and made plans with one of my bar flies wanting to get over depression right away. But then she called and we talked, and she said she would like to talk in person probably tonight. I've left her a message since then and said I would appreciate getting together tonight and showing her some of the magazines I have been in, my fights, and one UFC fight (Tito vs. Randy. I am waiting to here back from her. Earliar she was saying now she thinks we need to be a more casual thing than boyfriend/girlfriend route we were going done. Now I am pissed off and hurt, but figure if she calls me tonight and will look at MMA then maybe she could still be my main thing, and someone I could take to christmas parties etc when I get back from upcoming fight. Frustrated, Dear Don Juan abby, what do I do? Similar stories? Honest advise? Needed to vent

 

[cola]

Next her?

If your not a troll and really a good pro MMA fighter, then clearly a female on your mind constantly nagging you effects your training, thus effects your career.

Next.

Today calls and doesn't think we are in the same place in life. She's 31, me 26.

In woman-speak, it means that she's losing value due to age. She is ready to declare herself off the market and wanting to "settle down".

Just wanted to translate that for you. I'm fluent in their language.

 

[Bas Rutten]

Thanks Cola.

As for record, I've got 3 wins in MMA too, and 7-3 Submission Grappling, and Kudo fight against the champ and also sometimes Pancrase fighter Yamazaki. I will start in Golden Gloves or Diamond Gloves Amateur boxing soon. I met John Brown yesterday (assuming you know who he is).

it's pretty new, so I understand me talking about MMA and injuries and training all the time is probably weird. She has called about 10 minutes ago and I am meeting her at 9pm at her house, though if one of her roomates is home that likes to get involved in drama she asked to go out and I've agreed.

In someone's maybe she has some valid concerns, but I need to try for a couple of more years and see. By then I figure I will know what to do, to continue or maybe finish B.A. or re-enter military, or get EMT and Paramedic certified if I need to to become a fire fighter or get into Detroit PD or FD. I've got the time to figure out, she says she doesn't. It's just the first girl in about 3 years I've felt anything for, where maybe it could be more than sport sex. Any to be made to feel like I am not good enough because of my dreams is bull****.

 

[Warrior74]

WWTRBRD?

What Would The Real Bass Rutten Do?

Probably head butt a b1tch as he's a complete psycho. But he wouldn't take any sh1t I bet.

Stop trying to qualify your self to her by showing her your stuff. She either accepts it as a part of your life or she's not a part of your life. end of story.

 

[Mick Donaldson]

Reach for the stars bro.

 

[WaterTiger]

Bas Rutten...Talk to "Bible Belt" He's in a similar profession as you, maybe you guys could swap war stories & dating tips. You have your goals laid out, DO NOT let anyone change your mind! If this is your dream, GO FOR IT!


On the other side of the coin, there are women who get into martial arts, although they are not overly common. I'm going to guess that about 85% of women think boxing, cage fighting & wrestling are just silly. We can't wrap out heads around a reason that would make an educated, grown men strip down to their undies, jump up on a platform and pummel the crap out of each other.

This is one of those GUY things that women just never get. Do not expect women to understand or support you on this.You've chosen a lonely road, but you can walk it proudly.

Now I know there are going to be guys who come back with "Oh MY girl loves it!" No she doesn't, she thinks it's silly and is pretending to like it to make you happy.

 

[brokenupinside]

Ok so your career is the most important thing in your life now,why are you allowing a woman to come between you and your dreams?
DO you need a serious thing now when you need the next two years to really concentrate on you fighting?

You have to listen to yourself tho,if this career does not pan out then you are going going into firefighting,police or military......obvious you like action,danger,testosterone situations.
You say she is new in your life yet she's become important enough to cause you to miss trainning and disrupt you concentration.
You say that you are pissed off and hurt but this is a new girl,why are you so pisse doff and hurt......ok you get my drift.

Concentrate on you career,forget this girl and use your barflies for relief when you need it.
As far as she is concerned,my guees is that you are coming a little too strong plus your profession......I'd say she might be intimidated of afraid.

Why do youu care if she judges you without watching a fight?
She is not a fight judge and she does not care.All she thinks is that you may be a guy that cannot take no for an answer and this could very well be a SHYTE TEST.
I'd say forget this distraction.

 

[Bible_Belt]

Bas Rutten...Talk to "Bible Belt" He's in a similar profession as you, maybe you guys could swap war stories & dating tips. You have your goals laid out, DO NOT let anyone change your mind! If this is your dream, GO FOR IT!


On the other side of the coin, there are women who get into martial arts, although they are not overly common. I'm going to guess that about 85% of women think boxing, cage fighting & wrestling are just silly. We can't wrap out heads around a reason that would make an educated, grown men strip down to their undies, jump up on a platform and pummel the crap out of each other.

This is one of those GUY things that women just never get. Do not expect women to understand or support you on this.You've chosen a lonely road, but you can walk it proudly.

Now I know there are going to be guys who come back with "Oh MY girl loves it!" No she doesn't, she thinks it's silly and is pretending to like it to make you happy.

I agree that most women don't understand it, but at the same time, almost all of them are turned on by it. Anything stupidly masculine and high-testosterone will attract girls. Every fight I have ever been to has had a lot of attractive women in the crowd. And our afterparties are becoming legendary, beautiful women everywhere. Although some fighters are still AFCs, I think all of us at least get initial interest from women. Part of it is mere social proof - if you are doing anything that a thousand people bought a ticket to watch you do, it doesn't matter if it's tap dancing, women are attracted to anyone in the spotlight.

To the OP, you are probably too busy training to notice that you can have any woman you want. But for the most part, you can. There are plenty of mma groupies to go around.

 

[L777]

I'm fluent in there language.

But not in ours.

lulz.

 

[Caliente Ice]

I too have faced similar difficulty, since I have chosen the way of the fighter. The answer is simple. You just need to "cull the heard" more efficiently in order to find a woman more receptive to the fighting lifestyle.

For example, when I first meet a woman at a club, I whip out my sweet nunchucks and go into a routine. I tell her that if she can take the chucks off of me without breaking any fingers, I'm hers. Other options would include challenging her to a Ninja stalking competition in a hedge maze at midnight, or if you're not into all that preparation just challenge her to a little Kendo match.

That way you get the unfit out of the way in a hurry, and save a lot of valuable training time.

 

[Jon55]

Stop trying to qualify your self to her by showing her your stuff. She either accepts it as a part of your life or she's not a part of your life. end of story.

And end of thread. It's your life you need to focus on. If a girl who seems pretty cool wants to be a part of it, awesome. If she's giving you mixed signals, too bad for her. You don't have time to deal with that junk because you have goals and priorities.

 

[fertileTurtle]

Bas Rutten...Talk to "Bible Belt" He's in a similar profession as you, maybe you guys could swap war stories & dating tips. You have your goals laid out, DO NOT let anyone change your mind! If this is your dream, GO FOR IT!

......

This is one of those GUY things that women just never get. Do not expect women to understand or support you on this.You've chosen a lonely road, but you can walk it proudly.

Now I know there are going to be guys who come back with "Oh MY girl loves it!" No she doesn't, she thinks it's silly and is pretending to like it to make you happy.

y r u trying 2 change it then ?

 

[fertileTurtle]

Bas Rutten...Talk to "Bible Belt" He's in a similar profession as you, maybe you guys could swap war stories & dating tips. You have your goals laid out, DO NOT let anyone change your mind! If this is your dream, GO FOR IT!

......

This is one of those GUY things that women just never get. Do not expect women to understand or support you on this.You've chosen a lonely road, but you can walk it proudly.

Now I know there are going to be guys who come back with "Oh MY girl loves it!" No she doesn't, she thinks it's silly and is pretending to like it to make you happy.

y r u trying 2 change it then ?

 

[cola]

But not in ours.

lulz.

Aren't you just a sack of sh!ts and giggles..

 

[WaterTiger]

y r u trying 2 change it then ?

Change what?

 

[Dust 2 Dust]

Bas Rutten,

You should avoid women who don't support your career unless you want to end up like Mark Kerr. Do you really want to come home after a fight to an unsupportive woman who despises combat sports and your chosen profession?

 

[FairShake]

If a woman doesn't get you she's not for you.

Simple.

 

[EBickford]

Bas( even though you arent the real Bas),

tell her to either accept it or next her. i am a mixed martial artist as well, and the absolute worst thing we can have is relationship problems. What we do takes complete focus and dedication, and women problems just **** our heads all up.

i have recently come back from a 3 month hiatus due to me breaking up with my ex. at one point, i never wanted to train again, because i missed her so much.

so get this **** taken care of, or get out now, because all it will do is hurt your training at some point, and you dont want that.

 

[Gameness]

I could give you some insight on the matter since i've been fighting MMA/NHB since 2000. I've ran through a fair number of women through these years while training and competing.
As fighters, we have a bounty on our heads from the crazy women. They are attracted to the whole 'bad boy image', many of them stalkers or bit*ches that want to change your lifestyle. Only get together with the supportive type of girl, if she doesn't like your training, she doesn't like you for who you are either. Before you know it, she will change every little part of your life until you are a tampoon faced whipped chump sitting outside of a booth at some clothing store.

Get a supportive girlfriend that likes you for who you are, fighting or not. NEVER give up your interests for anyone, especially not something as beautiful as our beloved sport. And let her know it, vale tudo all the way :trouble:

 

[Jon55]

y r u trying 2 change it then ?

y r u typin like a 12 y/o?