girl msg me to whine about work?

[tony-montana]

i havent spoken to her much cause we just met but i got a msg today from her about somethin that happened at work. like someone told her to do something on the pc and then they stuffed up. do i even reply to these rant/vent msgs?

 

[=VAGO=]

no. dont become an emotional tampon for her. Instead lead the conversation where you want it to go!

 

[tony-montana]

so don't ignore it, instead change the topic and talk about something else?

 

[Joe Stud]

yes, IF she is a prospect to be drafted into your stable. If she keeps veering her conversation towards the work problem(s), she has little or no interest.

 

[Commandante]

do i even reply to these rant/vent msgs?

Are you a fvckin´ chatbot or what?

 

[J. Darko]

For f*ck sake. These guys tell you not to be her emotional tampon, but they don't realise that girls are, like men, human beings too with emotions and want some empathy and understanding. You don't have to act like her psychologist, but you can just be a human and acknowledge her as a human being by sending something like ''sorry to hear you had such a bad day'' and leave it at that. You don't lose your alphaness, macho image, DJ status or whatever the f*ck this forum teaches by sending a short message back.

 

[vatoloco]

Ha! What you do in this case is call her up and say:

"Hey listen sweetheart. Let's make your day a whole lot better! Let's get together tonight for [insert fun activity here]. I'll pick you up at 8:00. Wear something sexy!"

You guys have to learn to recognize and seize opportunities.

If she doesn't accept, well, you know she was just bored and wanted the attention of whatever chump was willing to give it her.

 

[vatoloco]

You don't have to act like her psychologist, but you can just be a human and acknowledge her as a human being by sending something like ''sorry to hear you had such a bad day'' and leave it at that.

Why should one apologize for something one didn't do? Sure, if I fvck up and I'm guilty of something, I apologize and learn from whatever the fvck I did wrong. However, if I have no control over how sh!tty her boss/job/etc. is, why should I take an apologetic, beta-like attitude?

Like I said, instead turn the situation around to get together and have fun with the girl.

 

[J. Darko]

Why should one apologize for something one didn't do? Sure, if I fvck up and I'm guilty of something, I apologize and learn from whatever the fvck I did wrong. However, if I have no control over how sh!tty her boss/job/etc. is, why should I take an apologetic, beta-like attitude?

Like I said, instead turn the situation around to get together and have fun with the girl.

''Sorry to hear'' is a saying, not an actual apology. You could also say: too bad to hear that blabla.

 

[vatoloco]

''Sorry to hear'' is a saying, not an actual apology. You could also say: too bad to hear that blabla.

But, if he's going to reply via text (which I know it's likely he will -- less chance of getting rejected that way ) what she will see is the word "Sorry" on her phone screen w/o any kind of body language clues to emphasize that it's being used empathetically instead of apologetically.

 

[bukowski_merit]

For f*ck sake. These guys tell you not to be her emotional tampon, but they don't realise that girls are, like men, human beings too with emotions and want some empathy and understanding. You don't have to act like her psychologist, but you can just be a human and acknowledge her as a human being by sending something like ''sorry to hear you had such a bad day'' and leave it at that. You don't lose your alphaness, macho image, DJ status or whatever the f*ck this forum teaches by sending a short message back.

Your lack of experience and failures have taken over your ability to listen to people who know what they're talking about (there's people here with YEARS/DECADES of real experience). Not some guy that 8 months ago was crying about being socially awkward and not having a place in this world!

---

To the OP:

It's hard to lead a woman out of a bad emotional state through text. So, if a woman does something like that to me, i let them talk very briefly about what is going on; then i offer to meet them (if i have room to meet them); then when they are with me - i can easily lead their brains wherever i want.

A woman complaining about her bad day to my face is wayyyyy easier to seduce into a good mood (followed by $ex) than one who's communicating to me through an outlet where she is in her own domain (email, text, IM, or phone)

The way I personally lead women through text is something like this:

Woman: Im having such a bad day. My boss is such a.... blah blah blah
Me: Baby it sounds like you need some relaxation in your life. when do you get to relax?
Woman: I don't ever get to relax! My whole life is blah blah blah....
Me: Well i was planning to [buy a bottle of wine/go to X bar] tonight... You're welcome to come to me and have a few drinks, a few smiles, and a lot of relaxation.

unless she already has plans - she'll jump on it.

---
On a sidenote: I wouldn't be so concerned with how to respond, but more so with why a woman you just meant is dumping her emotional BS on you! Any woman who does things like that is more socially awkward than J. Darko is.

 

[Nutz]

so don't ignore it, instead change the topic and talk about something else?

Think of it this way, she's contacting you so she's investing. First you need to reward her investment. Do this by giving her good emotions, which is where some solid ****y/funny comes into play. Second you need to steer her attention in the direction you want it to go, otherwise you end up her new girlfriend she'll talk about shoes with and the guy that disrespects her but she can't get enough sex from.

 

[J. Darko]

Your lack of experience and failures have taken over your ability to listen to people who know what they're talking about (there's people here with YEARS/DECADES of real experience). Not some guy that 8 months ago was crying about being socially awkward and not having a place in this world!

---

To the OP:

It's hard to lead a woman out of a bad emotional state through text. So, if a woman does something like that to me, i let them talk very briefly about what is going on; then i offer to meet them (if i have room to meet them); then when they are with me - i can easily lead their brains wherever i want.

A woman complaining about her bad day to my face is wayyyyy easier to seduce into a good mood (followed by $ex) than one who's communicating to me through an outlet where she is in her own domain (email, text, IM, or phone)

The way I personally lead women through text is something like this:

Woman: Im having such a bad day. My boss is such a.... blah blah blah
Me: Baby it sounds like you need some relaxation in your life. when do you get to relax?
Woman: I don't ever get to relax! My whole life is blah blah blah....
Me: Well i was planning to [buy a bottle of wine/go to X bar] tonight... You're welcome to come to me and have a few drinks, a few smiles, and a lot of relaxation.

unless she already has plans - she'll jump on it.

---
On a sidenote: I wouldn't be so concerned with how to respond, but more so with why a woman you just meant is dumping her emotional BS on you! Any woman who does things like that is more socially awkward than J. Darko is.

Things have changed my friend. Better not to judge so soon. By the way, you're just a screen name on a computer. You might be a virgin and acting all tough now, so don't.