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i tend to agree, it seems like there might be a bit of over-reaction here. I definitely feel like this was a test, and I feel great that I called her out on it. Wish I had done it in the moment that it came up, but I needed time to digest it.Vulpine said:Guys, guys... calm down.
This is the nurse chick, "Ms. 30".
She's into him, and this "other guy" fitness test is just a variation of the standard always-used "this guy wants to XYZ" jealousy/reaction guage.
:yawn:
If MtnMan reacts with "sure, whatever", her test results are "He's not committed/is a player".
If MtnMan reacts with "HEY! ƒUCK THAT!", her test results with "He's hooked, it's safe to proceed to more".
In nutshell, she's using the test to gauge her interest in him. She's calibrating her own involvement off HIS... this is pretty standard stuff. If he plays it off, she backs off. If he gets fighty, it's ok to be gah-gah over dude.
It's just a gauging test. Not a crazy "control" thing, or much more than that.
You see all sorts of variations of the same "early relationship" testing: invited to a snuggle party with some guy, going out with a friend for whatever, "an old friend from" wants to (whatever) to make you react...
I'm a little surprised by the over-the-top overt sexual reference here with this test's variation, though. But, just as with any sh¡t test, it's a congruence thing. If MtnMan is the real deal, pass the test. If MtnMan gets douchy, fail.
"Orgasmic meditation"? I'll have to try that up in the deer stand in a few minutes. ...better wear my harness, too.
^^^^ Agreed. However, the dude that gave her the book is trouble, like Someone else said.Vulpine said:Guys, guys... calm down.
This is the nurse chick, "Ms. 30".
She's into him, and this "other guy" fitness test is just a variation of the standard always-used "this guy wants to XYZ" jealousy/reaction guage.
:yawn:
If MtnMan reacts with "sure, whatever", her test results are "He's not committed/is a player".
If MtnMan reacts with "HEY! ƒUCK THAT!", her test results with "He's hooked, it's safe to proceed to more".
In nutshell, she's using the test to gauge her interest in him. She's calibrating her own involvement off HIS... this is pretty standard stuff. If he plays it off, she backs off. If he gets fighty, it's ok to be gah-gah over dude.
It's just a gauging test. Not a crazy "control" thing, or much more than that.
You see all sorts of variations of the same "early relationship" testing: invited to a snuggle party with some guy, going out with a friend for whatever, "an old friend from" wants to (whatever) to make you react...
I'm a little surprised by the over-the-top overt sexual reference here with this test's variation, though. But, just as with any sh¡t test, it's a congruence thing. If MtnMan is the real deal, pass the test. If MtnMan gets douchy, fail.
"Orgasmic meditation"? I'll have to try that up in the deer stand in a few minutes. ...better wear my harness, too.
MOTU, I agree. Haven't had a great feeling about this dude from the start.MOTU said:the dude that gave her the book is trouble, like Someone else said.
( . )( . ) said:How about reading a book on how-to a "slow roast with gravy" instead?
I would look at it from a slightly different perspective. The fact that she would try to sh!t test him like that shows that the girl had very serious reservations about the OP to begin with. She would not dare to p!ss him off with such an outrageous sh!t test if she thought the OP had any backbone. Basically, the less a woman respects you, and the less she is into you, the more ridiculous/extreme her sh!t tests will be. In that sense, a woman's sh!t tests are a good gauge of how interested she is. If she never tests you, or does it rarely and in a "mild" fashion, her interest level is very high.Vulpine said:Guys, guys... calm down.
This is the nurse chick, "Ms. 30".
She's into him, and this "other guy" fitness test is just a variation of the standard always-used "this guy wants to XYZ" jealousy/reaction guage.
:yawn:
If MtnMan reacts with "sure, whatever", her test results are "He's not committed/is a player".
If MtnMan reacts with "HEY! ƒUCK THAT!", her test results with "He's hooked, it's safe to proceed to more".
In nutshell, she's using the test to gauge her interest in him. She's calibrating her own involvement off HIS... this is pretty standard stuff. If he plays it off, she backs off. If he gets fighty, it's ok to be gah-gah over dude.
It's just a gauging test. Not a crazy "control" thing, or much more than that.
You see all sorts of variations of the same "early relationship" testing: invited to a snuggle party with some guy, going out with a friend for whatever, "an old friend from" wants to (whatever) to make you react...
I'm a little surprised by the over-the-top overt sexual reference here with this test's variation, though. But, just as with any sh¡t test, it's a congruence thing. If MtnMan is the real deal, pass the test. If MtnMan gets douchy, fail.
"Orgasmic meditation"? I'll have to try that up in the deer stand in a few minutes. ...better wear my harness, too.
Brah I know you want to believe what she says right now, mainly because this is the first girl you have really liked since your breakup with the ex, but I want you to really take a step back and look at what she said and did. I mean, reverse it. What frame of mind would you have to be in for you to say to her, "ya know, I have this friend, she's a girl, and we were talking where she would blow me without doing any other sort of touching. It's all really sterile and non sexual. And don't worry I read about it in a book, so nothing to worry about".MtnMan said:i tend to agree, it seems like there might be a bit of over-reaction here. I definitely feel like this was a test, and I feel great that I called her out on it. Wish I had done it in the moment that it came up, but I needed time to digest it.
I had sent her a text saying, "hi, give me a call when you get a min, thanks". She called right after her shift, and definitely had concern in her voice. I got straight to the point, and it went over really well.
Is this woman wife material? I don't know. Isn't that the whole point of dating someone? This incident really didn't rub me the wrong way enough to next her, especially after my chat with her last night.
I'm sure I risk being called beta, but to be honest, I have to trust my gut as I experience things over someone elses assessment of the situation via the internet.
I appreciate the responses, its just what I needed to grab my balls and clearly draw the line in the sand. :yes:
The ONLY thing?? What about when you went camping with her and she pulled the "how patient are you?" card?MtnMan said:However, there are some really good points being made here. This is literally the only thing I would consider a **** test that has come from this girl, and her interest still seems really high in all other accounts.