"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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Girl at College

knglerxt

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There's this girl that I'm interested in at college. She's a graduate student, and works at the campus health center. I see her every Monday since I'm actually going to counseling there. I'm in counseling because I'm 25 years old, and never had a girlfriend or anything. I've had severe depression and anxiety as a result.

One potential problem is that I'm sure by now she's noticed I go there to see the counselor. I don't know how most girls view this. Do they think you're wierd or something?

The main problem is this: I've always been a quiet guy. I don't even talk that much around my own family members. It's just my personality. I've set it in my mind to talk to this girl, but everytime I get the opportunity I end up saying nothing. One reason for this is most of the time the head nurse is sitting right beside her. I would prefer to talk to her when she's alone.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Phyzzle

Master Don Juan
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never had a girlfriend or anything. I've had severe depression and anxiety as a result.
No. That's not why you are depressed. I know this because depressed people who get a girlfriend generally stay depressed. Having a girlfriend doesn't cure crap, so don't worry about being single.

Don't worry about the fact that you're seeing a counselor. For all she knows, you could be seeing one because of a drug addiction, nothing wierd about that!

The problem is, flirting in front of an audience when you're already shy. I don't think your confidence is at that level yet. You should work hard on joining groups and learning how to make friends fast.

Try to stop yourself from thinking of one girl too much. Any girl will reject most guys PERIOD. You don't want to get all wrapped up in some girl who may not like you (or may turn out to be an idiot). You don't want to fear rejection.
 

swaptrex

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being single is sweet, believe me if you have a few gf's that carry emotions it shows you that being single isn't that bad. not getting laid sucks though, but oh well.
 

tuxen

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Well if your committed to changing thats the important thing. Take baby steps, start talking to people more.

Like ive mentioned in other posts, ask basic things:
-how to get somewhere
-ask for the time
-ask the checkout chick at the supermarket how her day is
-in a coffee shop ask what coffee they recommend

doesn't matter if its a guy or girl, just try to get use to interacting more, this will help build your confidence and make it easier to talk to girls you like. Try to make eye contact with people you talk to, as an exercise take note of their eye colour when you speak to them.

Also as others have said, try not to get too hung up on 1 girl.
 
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