Jokerlsk said:
I know I should, but it seems to be a part of me. I joke around a lot, and a lot of times girls think I"m a jerk.
I know that joking around is part of you. It's part of me as well,but so is being serious.
I'm just saying to express your joking side in a fun,light-hearted situation,and to express your serious side when you're serious about something.
And it's totally within your control. It IS.
And this is something you HAVE TO DO...
if you'd like to have a girlfriend someday. Because if you play and joke ALL THE TIME,when you do seriously ask a girl out,she won't think you're being serious.
I'm sure you've noticed that when you joke around a lot,people will joke around with you,while being serious with other people.
Like in your "Spin the Bottle" thread. The girl who you were interested in joked around when it can to kissing you,then she turned around and kissed one of your other friends with no problem at all.
You CANNOT TELL ME that it made you feel good to have the girl you liked "joke around" about kissing you,then seriously kiss your friend.
That'd be like a stab to the heart for me.
You're stonger than I am man. There's NO WAY I could keep repeatedly putting myself through pain after pain watching girls I liked toy and play around with me,while seriously dating or making out with other guys.
I simply wouldn't do that. I refuse.
Jokerisk said:
I don't want to be some emotionless freak. If that's your definition or 'serious,' although, i don't think you ever gave me your definition of serious.
No,that's not my definition of serious.
I don't think you should be an "emotionless freak". You know how you should be?
You should be like you are here on the forum.
You're not an emotionless freak here with us,and at the same time,you're not joking and clowning around every two seconds. You're being serious.
THAT'S what I mean. And if you can do it here,you can do it in conversation with some chick you like.
I'm NOT SAYING to stop joking,only to be a little MORE SERIOUS
when the situation calls for it.
Do you mean actually showing serious attraction? Instead of the girl constantly having to guess whether or not I'm attracted to her.
YES,
YES,,
YES!
This is EXACTLY what I mean.
Why are you trying to make the girl "wonder" if you're attracted to her or not? I'm not saying that this is a bad thing to do,it's just that you shouldn't start off AT THE BEGINNING doing this.
Let's get something straight:SHOWING YOUR INTEREST TO A GIRL
DOES NOT TURN HER OFF.
Let me repeat this to make sure you get it....
LETTING A GIRL KNOW YOU LIKE HER
DOES NOT TURN HER OFF.
It's
HOW YOU SHOW THAT INTEREST that determined if she'll like you back or not.
The problem isn't showing your interest,it's showing your interest as an AFC.
Let me give you an example of how I once approached a girl.
I was once talking to a girl at a retail store,and I recognized her from a fast food place where she used to work. Anyway,after I went to her register to check out,the convo went like this....
Me:Hey,didn't you used to work at so and so place?
her:God,I hated that place. How did you know I used to work there?
Me:Because everytime I went off in there,I wanted to talk to you.
her:...(surprised look on her face)
Me:Are you married?
her:No.
Me:You have a boyfriend?
her:No.
Me:Good,then we can go out.
There,you see that? I wasn't joking with her,I was serious.
I asked her about her status,(if she was married or not),or already seeing someone,then when I found out she was single,I TOLD HER that I wanted to see her.
We ended up dating for a little over a year,and this was back when I first started learning about this stuff.
Now when i said that to her,she was like,"Woah,woah,wait a minute...".
You have to pay CLOSE ATTENTION to what women say. She didn't say "no",or "I don't like you",she in essence was saying to slow down.
But that's a different story. The point is that "seriously showing your interest" to a girl is the ONLY WAY to SERIOUSLY get her to go out with you.
If you don't believe me,then tell me this:Are you happy with the results you've been getting by your way of joking and playing around with girls?
Has it gotten you want you wanted? Because if so,the forget EVERYTHING I just said and continue doing what you're doing.
Just consider SERIOUSLY showing a girl you're interested in her. There's millions of girls out there,so it won't kill you to try it on one of them.
If it doesn't work,then hey,you can always go back to whatever it is you're doing now,right?
