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GF of 2 + years didn´t answer my phone call last night

Dr.Suave

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And I didn´t hear from her until this morning. She claims her phone was on vibrate (which it normally is). She says she arrived home from work, made herself dinner, and played board games with her family until midnight and her battery died.

I know a lot of forum posters will jump and cry "cheating" but come on. This could be an isolated event as there has never been any suspicious behavior or any other indication of cheating.

In any case. What I want to hear from you is how would you handle this?
 

Von

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And I didn´t hear from her until this morning. She claims her phone was on vibrate (which it normally is). She says she arrived home from work, made herself dinner, and played board games with her family until midnight and her battery died.

I know a lot of forum posters will jump and cry "cheating" but come on. This could be an isolated event as there has never been any suspicious behavior or any other indication of cheating.

In any case. What I want to hear from you is how would you handle this?
Oh alright, what game did you play? Had fun?

Let's go on a date
 

GrowingPains

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Be cool bro, she was living life.

Ask how her family is/how the hangout went.

My question to you is why are you posting if you don't think she's cheating? If you truly believe she just had fun with her family, drop your suspicions and proceed as normal, ykno.
 

sazc

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My only question is - Is that atypical behavior?

Is it typical that she not text you at all during any random evening
 

Robert28

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I've had more success than you could ever imagine with women by giving them their space and not being all up in their business. Sure, some have taken advantage of that and cheated or taken it for granted, but 7 in 10 have ALWAYS come back later on wanting to "work things out" because they didn't realize how hard it was to find a guy that was willing to give them all the rope they needed to hang themselves with. I've got my own life to live and worry about, I don't try to worry about others.
 

mrgoodstuff

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I've had more success than you could ever imagine with women by giving them their space and not being all up in their business. Sure, some have taken advantage of that and cheated or taken it for granted, but 7 in 10 have ALWAYS come back later on wanting to "work things out" because they didn't realize how hard it was to find a guy that was willing to give them all the rope they needed to hang themselves with. I've got my own life to live and worry about, I don't try to worry about others.
You fvcked them after they came back?
 

Dr.Suave

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My only question is - Is that atypical behavior?

Is it typical that she not text you at all during any random evening
Most nights on weekdays she doesn´t reach out at night unless I reach out first. On weekends she´s all over me.

The only atypical thing was her not answering or returning my call. But after 2+ years it´s the first time. Could be an isolated event.
 

SoSuave666

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You fvcked them after they came back?
I used to be staunchly on the don't take back a girl that dumps you or cheats on you camp. I was so far in this camp that I can't believe what I'm about to type.

I am now in the camp of "sure, come back, but you're now demoted." I'll **** em but they will never get that companionship part of me back. Bottom tier plate/booty call. I'll string their ass along too "yea sure maybe in the future we can address our relationship." DEMOTED.
 

Robert28

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You fvcked them after they came back?
Only a couple because I wasn’t seeing someone else at the time they did. Usually when I’m over someone I lose all attraction I had towards them too.
 

Robert28

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Are you able to maintain that even when you really like the girl? I do the same but one time it didn't work bc I caught feelz. I tried so hard you just withdraw and keep playing it cool but it felt like a sham so I tanked it.
Well I’ve done exactly what you just said but I learned from it. You will too. I don’t catch feels easily but I swear there are some girls that just know how to sink their hooks into me and I have to stop myself from referring back to a groveling beta. Most girls criticize me of not caring enough now days.lol
 

marmel75

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Oh alright, what game did you play? Had fun?

Let's go on a date
"I've got a game we can play...its called hide the sausage...come over tonight and I'll show you how to play..."
 
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speed dawg

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And I didn´t hear from her until this morning. She claims her phone was on vibrate (which it normally is). She says she arrived home from work, made herself dinner, and played board games with her family until midnight and her battery died.

I know a lot of forum posters will jump and cry "cheating" but come on. This could be an isolated event as there has never been any suspicious behavior or any other indication of cheating.

In any case. What I want to hear from you is how would you handle this?
Her IL is definitely dropping. Probably because she can sense your insecurity. I can sense it in your post. Better correct that, and quick, or your irrational fears about her bouncing on another c*ck will soon become reality.
 

oldmanofthesea

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Are you able to maintain that even when you really like the girl? I do the same but one time it didn't work bc I caught feelz. I tried so hard you just withdraw and keep playing it cool but it felt like a sham so I tanked it.
How did you tank it exactly? Playing it "cool" is such a broad term. I tried playing it cool with this last girl I dated and I think all it did was postpone the inevitable. My definition of playing it cool is just giving them their space, not checking in on them, not showing any anxiety you have about them not reaching out to you, waiting for them to set dates when they seem to be cooling down, not double texting, being ok with not seeing them for a couple weeks, that kind of thing. But like your situation, because this girl was rare, I caught feelings and it made it so unpleasant for me even though I could keep being "cool". She'd do things like totally ignore a nude pic I'd send her, then text me 12 hours later with something completely unrelated like a description of what she had for lunch. Or she'd ignore my request for a date for 12-24 hours, yet I'd see her posting on FB. I had quite an internal battle over whether this was low IL, sh*t testing, or just how things are with this girl and that I should learn to not waste any time and energy on it and instead focus on enjoying her company and s*x when we are together and call it good. So I did really well in showing zero reaction to this kind of sh*t - nearly perfect actually. It didn't cause me to get needy, and ultimately she would ALWAYS reach out to me and set dates. However, just because I gave her a long leash and played it cool outwardly didn't mean I wasn't anxious inside. I was *miserable*, in the way only a girl you are really into can make you. So that's why I ended up "dumping" her. I could keep playing it cool, but it wasn't how I felt internally so it was just better for me to get out.

TL;DR: If you have to keep playing it cool past 2-3 months, she isn't that into you, and playing the game will only postpone the inevitable.


To OP: I wouldn't worry about an isolated incident like this from a GF of over 2 years. It happens. Are there any other signs recently? I would keep an eye open and maybe this is a warning for you to be on your toes - maybe pull back a bit and see how she reacts.
 
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Mazer

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Most nights on weekdays she doesn´t reach out at night unless I reach out first. On weekends she´s all over me.

The only atypical thing was her not answering or returning my call. But after 2+ years it´s the first time. Could be an isolated event.
If she isn’t initiating during the week at least once or twice her interest isn’t really that high. I would stop reaching out to her during the week to see if she contacts you. Don’t develop a pattern where she waits for you to contact her during the week. Mix it up.

Sounds like she treats you as her fwb or weekend guy to hang out. I also suspect a branch swing in the works. Either way keep an eye out and follow your gut.
 
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Chi Town

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You're gf didn't answer one phone call and you made a thread about It? Which means you are worried about some form of foul play, it's no big deal, no reason to be all in ya head about it, you're post shows neediness and insecurity, let's hope she doesn't sense it too
 
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