"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Getting Started.

Lennon

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After a solid 7 months of post-high-school graduation life (18 years old); which I've been living very unhappily, lazily, and unmotivatedly(?), I've decided my life is far to docile, far to passionless, and far, far to tragic. (Video games, lame attempts at being social, and chronic movie-watching).

I have no job or aspirations , and am personally (personality wise, not individually) lacking many traits and characteristics I want but haven't ever actively sought.

Here's the 'however'. I am absolutely fed up with this lifestyle and life. When I think of myself living like this, unfulfilled and unchallenged, for even another 7 months, I get a sickening feeling, absolutely sickening. For I want to live (and be a master DJ of course...).

Now my question is how do I get started practically (mentally I feel I'm down for anything to crack my life open). I've been reading The Rational Male, checking the forum, and of course have been devouring the DJ bible. I'm after some more individual or personal responses.

So, how do I get started?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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flowtheory

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Focus on which personality traits you want to have and do have. Fortify and develop those.

Start being active (run, bike, workout, whatever) and drop the tv and video games. Or at least with tv only allow an hour a day. Or like me, 1 movie a week or two tv episodes a week only on Sunday.
Pick up some books and expand your knowledge in all areas of interest and not just dating.

Go get a job. Any job.

Take a look at some dating books and ideas, sure. But first you need to build a foundation to put that dating knowledge on. Because if you don’t as an individual have anything going on in your personal world, you don’t have much value for anyone at all.
A person with no job, inspiration, goals and dreams, social skills will not be able to hold the attention of a woman.
 
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Serenity

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Been there, it's simpler than you'd think, but still hard in a way. To break out of your habits you must start doing things that you usually don't do. Go out and try being the guy you wish to be with the traits and characteristics you want to have. Have realistic expectations, know that you will absolutely not nail it right away. You may even make a fool of yourself, but that's honestly a lot better than remaining stuck where you are now.

I'm sure you'll be fine, you can only become so frustrated before your mind just switches mode and you start doing. You can accelerate it though. Stop reading, stop thinking about and start acting. You literally need to physically start moving. Put your attention away from the inside of your mind and put it on your body and surroundings, what you'll see is reality.
 

Lennon

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Despite sounding incredibly pessimistic in my original post, I am sure that it’s very possible. I sometimes have a glimpse of that “childhood confidence” or whatever you want to call it. On occasion when I’m chatting to a girl at some party I previously didn’t want to go to, something will just flow, and I’ll have her for a bit. Of course, I’ll ruin it for myself by the end of the night or by texting her tomorrow. So, you know, I’m a believer. Cheers for the tips.
 
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