"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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Getting Started.

Lennon

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After a solid 7 months of post-high-school graduation life (18 years old); which I've been living very unhappily, lazily, and unmotivatedly(?), I've decided my life is far to docile, far to passionless, and far, far to tragic. (Video games, lame attempts at being social, and chronic movie-watching).

I have no job or aspirations , and am personally (personality wise, not individually) lacking many traits and characteristics I want but haven't ever actively sought.

Here's the 'however'. I am absolutely fed up with this lifestyle and life. When I think of myself living like this, unfulfilled and unchallenged, for even another 7 months, I get a sickening feeling, absolutely sickening. For I want to live (and be a master DJ of course...).

Now my question is how do I get started practically (mentally I feel I'm down for anything to crack my life open). I've been reading The Rational Male, checking the forum, and of course have been devouring the DJ bible. I'm after some more individual or personal responses.

So, how do I get started?
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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flowtheory

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Focus on which personality traits you want to have and do have. Fortify and develop those.

Start being active (run, bike, workout, whatever) and drop the tv and video games. Or at least with tv only allow an hour a day. Or like me, 1 movie a week or two tv episodes a week only on Sunday.
Pick up some books and expand your knowledge in all areas of interest and not just dating.

Go get a job. Any job.

Take a look at some dating books and ideas, sure. But first you need to build a foundation to put that dating knowledge on. Because if you don’t as an individual have anything going on in your personal world, you don’t have much value for anyone at all.
A person with no job, inspiration, goals and dreams, social skills will not be able to hold the attention of a woman.
 
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Serenity

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Been there, it's simpler than you'd think, but still hard in a way. To break out of your habits you must start doing things that you usually don't do. Go out and try being the guy you wish to be with the traits and characteristics you want to have. Have realistic expectations, know that you will absolutely not nail it right away. You may even make a fool of yourself, but that's honestly a lot better than remaining stuck where you are now.

I'm sure you'll be fine, you can only become so frustrated before your mind just switches mode and you start doing. You can accelerate it though. Stop reading, stop thinking about and start acting. You literally need to physically start moving. Put your attention away from the inside of your mind and put it on your body and surroundings, what you'll see is reality.
 

Lennon

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Despite sounding incredibly pessimistic in my original post, I am sure that it’s very possible. I sometimes have a glimpse of that “childhood confidence” or whatever you want to call it. On occasion when I’m chatting to a girl at some party I previously didn’t want to go to, something will just flow, and I’ll have her for a bit. Of course, I’ll ruin it for myself by the end of the night or by texting her tomorrow. So, you know, I’m a believer. Cheers for the tips.
 
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