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Getting rid of intellectualism

anonymous12345

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In my interactions I suspect I have the problem of appearing too intellectual or displaying too much value. Here’s how my convo might be:

Me: “I study language X. You’re French/Swedish right, how do you deal with pronunciation/bla bla?”
Her: bla bla bla

Later on:

Me: “You took pictures at the concert last night, right? How did they turn out?”
Her: “it was ok”
Me: “I was once shooting for a club in (capital) city X, but my laptop got stolen. That job got botched, heh.”
Her: <short answer, leaves>

Shy, nerdy girl. It’s not necessarily low interest, it can be explained in other ways. We’re on different parts of the globe and cultures here, so what’s considered right is very contextual.

The girls I talk with are 20-23, I’m 37. I obviously got more experience than them, but I suspect I scare them away with too much DHV. I got intellectualism as a defence mechanism due to fear of intimacy I think. One do too much DHV if one is insecure.

The solution is to say stuff like “I like pizza. Do you like pizza?” Lulz. But I find it really hard in many ways. I don’t got the patience for taking it so slow/close.

This is also relevant: “Note [the problem] isn’t having too much value – it’s showing it.” Is spot on I think, taken from this article:

https://www.girlschase.com/content/secrets-getting-girls-staying-out-auto-rejection
 

Pierce Manhammer

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I dated a very young woman for a good year, me middle aged, her coed. She is extremely intelligent and over time (it’s been 5 years now) I’ve been able to ask her about the things she thought when we dated.

She said that she simultaneously loved and despised my level of experience and command of life’s challenges, that despite being correct when I offfered solutions that it bothered her.

So keep it light, “hey did you see Doja’s new video?!” Lmfao, and just let her talk…

Then spread the petals and extract the nectar.
 

Black Widow Void

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‘Dummying it down’ is no fun. In fact, compromising our identity for the outcome of snatch can be just as rewarding as self-defeating.

The one thing that I’ve discovered is that a woman with a degree (or in the process of earning one) does not necessarily equate to intelligence.

In many cases, this only proves their ability to memorize and have good study habits. Thinking and formulating individual ideas is an entirely different thing — there’s a difference between being smart and being intelligent.

When choosing female company (beyond one night) it’s a good idea to distinguish between the two.
 

Kotaix

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I've run into this problem before. I knew a girl who was perfectly aware of the fact that she wasn't smart, and said so. She said multiple times that my level of intellect was intimidating to her, but that she didn't care. I was actually able to get her interested in intellectual topics because I was able to dumb them down for her. It made me wonder if she wasn't so much dumb as just ignorant (big difference).

I later invited her and one of her friends for a boat tour, I came with a friend of mine who brought a group of 5 intellectual deliotte consultant coworkers as tag alongs. The intellectuals spent most of the day talking about intellectual topics, bragging about social positions and connections, and generally engaged in subtle d!ck measuring, while the other two were more redneck types and talked about fishing and simple stuff.

I could have engaged with the intellectuals. I can talk people under the table on many subjects, but my redneck friend would have been completely left out because she had no means of engaging with them. I had a ton of fun with her and her friend just shooting the sh!t.

The point of the long story is that it really drove home to me how unrelatable intellectuals are to the average person.

When meeting a girl and keeping the interaction going, if she can't relate to what you're taking about, she'll shut down.

At the end of the day, showing off intellect or value is narcissistic.
 
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My friend gets girls by acting like this lol. You are just going after the wrong type of women.
 
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Gamisch

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In my interactions I suspect I have the problem of appearing too intellectual or displaying too much value. Here’s how my convo might be:

Me: “I study language X. You’re French/Swedish right, how do you deal with pronunciation/bla bla?”
Her: bla bla bla

Later on:

Me: “You took pictures at the concert last night, right? How did they turn out?”
Her: “it was ok”
Me: “I was once shooting for a club in (capital) city X, but my laptop got stolen. That job got botched, heh.”
Her: <short answer, leaves>

Shy, nerdy girl. It’s not necessarily low interest, it can be explained in other ways. We’re on different parts of the globe and cultures here, so what’s considered right is very contextual.

The girls I talk with are 20-23, I’m 37. I obviously got more experience than them, but I suspect I scare them away with too much DHV. I got intellectualism as a defence mechanism due to fear of intimacy I think. One do too much DHV if one is insecure.

The solution is to say stuff like “I like pizza. Do you like pizza?” Lulz. But I find it really hard in many ways. I don’t got the patience for taking it so slow/close.

This is also relevant: “Note [the problem] isn’t having too much value – it’s showing it.” Is spot on I think, taken from this article:

https://www.girlschase.com/content/secrets-getting-girls-staying-out-auto-rejection
You gotta make the right assessment , what type of woman are you dealing with? You gotta be able to adjust to her level(because you want something from her, right?) Girlchase has a article about this too, where its advice is to be a unpredicatble chameleon, even in a LTR.

Being intellectual wont do anything with women, unless you connect it to another thing that's eventually "sexy" , or shows you a great provider. The latter you dont want.
The only benefit of being intellectual is you can up the stakes when the woman happens to be intellectual, or you gotta hold yourself in x and x situation. And even then you convo should have some light innuendo here and there,be playfull when needed. You can even flash it to a woman to show you are deeper, but just don't flaunt it . She gonna see right through that shyt and perceive you as boring. Imagine James bond flirting with a dumb bimbo big ttted waitress vs J bond flirting with a smart hot doctor .

Then there's ofcourse age. I know guys on this site tell everyone to get women as young as possible, but being 37 you gotta have a wider age bracket to hunt in then 20 to 23 imo. Even if it's for practice purposes.
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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In my interactions I suspect I have the problem of appearing too intellectual or displaying too much value. Here’s how my convo might be:

Me: “I study language X. You’re French/Swedish right, how do you deal with pronunciation/bla bla?”
Her: bla bla bla

Later on:

Me: “You took pictures at the concert last night, right? How did they turn out?”
Her: “it was ok”
Me: “I was once shooting for a club in (capital) city X, but my laptop got stolen. That job got botched, heh.”
Her: <short answer, leaves>

Shy, nerdy girl. It’s not necessarily low interest, it can be explained in other ways. We’re on different parts of the globe and cultures here, so what’s considered right is very contextual.

The girls I talk with are 20-23, I’m 37. I obviously got more experience than them, but I suspect I scare them away with too much DHV. I got intellectualism as a defence mechanism due to fear of intimacy I think. One do too much DHV if one is insecure.

The solution is to say stuff like “I like pizza. Do you like pizza?” Lulz. But I find it really hard in many ways. I don’t got the patience for taking it so slow/close.

This is also relevant: “Note [the problem] isn’t having too much value – it’s showing it.” Is spot on I think, taken from this article:

https://www.girlschase.com/content/secrets-getting-girls-staying-out-auto-rejection
Pwf just had a pod. He mentioned that game isn't rational. mentioned flow state and to vibe. When you self amuse it's not rational. Just flow. Intelligence has its place. Better to be fun and free. Ask how can I make this fun? Women are typically Codependent and followers rather than free thinking. Feminism, independent woman or whatever buzz word and phrases the culture pushes, women will parrot. Trying to impress her with IQ is a fools errand.

At gunpoint, I am not funny. Women will say I'm funny. Why? I'm attractive to her. Halo effect. I self amuse. Whatever i think is funny she thinks is funny. Obv have authenticity. Don't be a dancing monkey.

One of my mates was at a party skipping around with cabbage patch looking trolls. Hot girls just threw themselves at him. He wasn't trying to be smart or impress with Witt. everything in the game is funny. Act accordingly.

If your not laughing you aren't doing it right.
 

Serenity

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Subjects are boring as hell. As a defense mechanism they're avoiding emotions. Women love emotions, particularly positive ones. You avoiding it is like the relationship being dead before it even starts.

Had the same issue, even I got bored of myself eventually. One day I went out to meet women with zero fvcks given about anything intellectual, just being inpulsive and damn near unfiltered, took nothing seriously. It was glorious.

Fvck what language you study, fvck asking about dumb pictures and fvck that club in city X. It's not engaging, it's not fun and it's boring as hell. It doesn't bring your "value" up anything in relation to women.
 

BuckledWheel

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Dude you’re boring the ass of these chicks. It’s got nothing to do with intellect? You’re telling them everything in a blurb. Less is more. Say less, add some mystery to yourself & keep quiet. Let them drag information from you & when you speak, speak in your native language. No-one cares that you speak different languages, it’s not impressing them. Stop trying to impress & go with the flow. Let the chick bring up questions that you can answer. Work out if she’s on your level, if not think about moving to someone who is.
 

firstbornunicorn

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I've heard "I wish I could be in your head for day, firstbornunicorn" more than once. So some will like it.
 

AureliusMaximus

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In my interactions I suspect I have the problem of appearing too intellectual or displaying too much value. Here’s how my convo might be:

Me: “I study language X. You’re French/Swedish right, how do you deal with pronunciation/bla bla?”
Her: bla bla bla

Later on:

Me: “You took pictures at the concert last night, right? How did they turn out?”
Her: “it was ok”
Me: “I was once shooting for a club in (capital) city X, but my laptop got stolen. That job got botched, heh.”
Her: <short answer, leaves>

Shy, nerdy girl. It’s not necessarily low interest, it can be explained in other ways. We’re on different parts of the globe and cultures here, so what’s considered right is very contextual.

The girls I talk with are 20-23, I’m 37. I obviously got more experience than them, but I suspect I scare them away with too much DHV. I got intellectualism as a defence mechanism due to fear of intimacy I think. One do too much DHV if one is insecure.

The solution is to say stuff like “I like pizza. Do you like pizza?” Lulz. But I find it really hard in many ways. I don’t got the patience for taking it so slow/close.

This is also relevant: “Note [the problem] isn’t having too much value – it’s showing it.” Is spot on I think, taken from this article:

https://www.girlschase.com/content/secrets-getting-girls-staying-out-auto-rejection
The real problem is that Scandinavian girls are feminazis from birth, especially Swedish women are die hard fans of feminism because Swedish men doesn't have pair of balls at home, they are mostly cvcks. So in most homes the wife/Gf has the pants on which results in the above mentioned. I live in Sweden so I see it all the time. But it also makes it more complicated because of the fking #meetoo here is strong and has a great presence.
Heck I even meet a lot of Swedish guys that call themselves "feminists" like WTF right?

Back home in Demark it is bad too; especially since the #meetoo virus wrecked up the social fabric in Denmark last year and at lot of guys where attacked and got their balls ripped off. But at least we not proudly calling ourselves "The most feminists' nation in the world" and brags about having a "feminist government" as Sweden does.
 
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SW15

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The point of the long story is that it really drove home to me how unrelatable intellectuals are to the average person.

When meeting a girl and keeping the interaction going, if she can't relate to what you're taking about, she'll shut down.

At the end of the day, showing off intellect or value is narcissistic.
Some of the most intelligent men have some of the biggest issues in seduction. Smart is not that big of an asset with women. Big muscles are a more meaningful asset.

There are a few reasons that smart men tend to be incel or experience long sexual droughts.

1. Their physiques don't turn on women. The typical guy in a STEM-related occupation doesn't have a body that would instanteously produce vaginal tingles.
2. They are unrelatable to women. Women operate on "all the feels". They want to have some man that can relate to them to some extent while retaining a masculine aura. She has to feel some connection. A lot of times, you'll see women bail on interactions after first dates on account of "not feeling butterflies". Many women expect immense "butterflies and fireworks" on the first date. She has to feel something. Smart men are not the best at producing "all the feels". This might be an even bigger problem than number 1.

Always relate to a woman on her level. I think most men of above average intelligence or higher will have to dumb it down for most women.
 

Mike32ct

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Some of the most intelligent men have some of the biggest issues in seduction. Smart is not that big of an asset with women. Big muscles are a more meaningful asset.

There are a few reasons that smart men tend to be incel or experience long sexual droughts.

1. Their physiques don't turn on women. The typical guy in a STEM-related occupation doesn't have a body that would instanteously produce vaginal tingles.
2. They are unrelatable to women. Women operate on "all the feels". They want to have some man that can relate to them to some extent while retaining a masculine aura. She has to feel some connection. A lot of times, you'll see women bail on interactions after first dates on account of "not feeling butterflies". Many women expect immense "butterflies and fireworks" on the first date. She has to feel something. Smart men are not the best at producing "all the feels". This might be an even bigger problem than number 1.

Always relate to a woman on her level. I think most men of above average intelligence or higher will have to dumb it down for most women.
Agree completely. This almost deserves its own thread. Where should an intelligent guy (such as a STEM geek) focus his efforts to improve from a game perspective?

(Looksmaxxing like working out is understood. I’m focusing purely on #2 here.)
 
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Agree completely. This almost deserves its own thread. Where should an intelligent guy (such as a STEM geek) focus his efforts to improve from a game perspective?

(Looksmaxxing like working out is understood. I’m focusing purely on #2 here.)
Unless you are one of those nerds that can talk football and shvt, stay away from bars & clubs. Smart men are the most vulnerable to toxic women period, so stay the hell away from areas your kryptonite lurks. You are better off on OLD or approaching women in coffee shops or something.
 

HaleyBaron

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Agree completely. This almost deserves its own thread. Where should an intelligent guy (such as a STEM geek) focus his efforts to improve from a game perspective?

(Looksmaxxing like working out is understood. I’m focusing purely on #2 here.)
Looks and social calibration. I know because I came from that sphere. Get fit, learn fashion, and learn to talk. I had a headstart in the social department and got it beat into me to change through elementary [sometimes literally]. Cue the phrase "they do not get bullied enough." I wised up came middle school. I did not get fit however until post college. I had plenty of times I could have gotten a gf but I was so obsessed with school I did not pay women much attention [girls were always friendly with me and complimented a lot]. Eventually I started to because you cannot fight hormones. My face and social personality was good at attracting girls. I was lacking in one place: my fitness. I was skinny as hell. Which confused me because I have seen plenty of cute girls with skinny guys throughout my life. What did they have that I did not? Most likely I was not initiating enough. I did not go to many social events and I was a full on academic and gaming nerd.

If I were to use what I know today, my advice to myself would have been:
  • Get a gym membership and hit the weights like all the jocks were doing. [at the time I was afraid of embarrassment of a skinny guy using weights and thought I would be made fun of. Little did I know that athletes want you to get fit like them]
  • Go to more college events instead of going out with your nerd friends and playing games every weekend or remaining in the house [I still had fun but my lack of a sex life was mostly because I was not interacting with women a lot. This changed near the end of my college life]
  • Learn how to dress [I was very lazy with my fashion. Unfitting clothes, whatever is most comfortable, and sometimes wearing my fandom on shirts]
For more troublesome nerds, they would have more bullet points than this.
 
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Why is this the case, and what can be done about it?
Your typical smart man isn't very emotionally intelligent or people smart so they are the most vulnerable to the mind games and the bait & switch tactics toxic women play. Logic is ineffective against the bait & switch technique lol. Furthermore, smart men are more likely to want to help their partners, so they can end up being tricked into a parasitic relationship with a woman that uses them.
 

HaleyBaron

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Develop sense of humor. watching comedy should help
Nerds naturally can be comedians because they look at the world more logically. They just need an element of social intelligence to keep it from becoming excessive sarcasm. They also have to be able to read the room, which is something I see a lot of them lack. But that goes along with social intelligence.
 
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