So there was a talent show last night, and I just sucked up there, dude. Went up there infront of a big audience, felt really nervous, couldn't remember the notes, and didn't look like I knew what I was doing. It didn't completely suck, because now I atleast know what I've got to improve on, before I go up stage again, also, most would've just quit if they were as unprepared as me, but I went up there. The thing I'm worried about is that everyone now thinks that I suck, and don't know how to play guitar, I even heard some girls talking in the audience. Bad enough that people already think I'm special, and this only gives them something more to slaughter my reputation with. There were a few people who said I did a good job, but I think they're just saying that to make me feel better. Getting to the point, how would a Don Juan take this failure? Should a Don Juan even CARE what other people think?
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Getting over embarassment.
- Thread starter MikeViper
- Start date
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
WesCottII
Master Don Juan
I thought you were banned. In any case, I'm in a real good mood, and you might have turned over a new leaf. So here goes.
Ever heard the maxim "you cannot have success without failure". Look at the rich and affluent in the world today...Donald Trump, Alan Sugar and Richard Branson....all failed, all went broke...all picked themselves up and are now extremly wealthy men.
Applying this to your situation is easy....you failed, so what? We all burn out, but that experience teaches us not to burn out the next time round.
Ever heard the maxim "you cannot have success without failure". Look at the rich and affluent in the world today...Donald Trump, Alan Sugar and Richard Branson....all failed, all went broke...all picked themselves up and are now extremly wealthy men.
Applying this to your situation is easy....you failed, so what? We all burn out, but that experience teaches us not to burn out the next time round.
So what your saying is that I should learn from my failures, and use what I learn from my failures to not mess up again? I think I can understand that. Also now that I think about it, experienced guitarist like John Petrucci, weren't born experienced guitarist, they had to go through a lot of work, and failures, to get where they are now. Maybe this failure is even a sign of something good coming in the future.WesCottII said:
WesCottII
Master Don Juan
Exactly. It's just a big lesson.
Rather like approaching women, the first time you do it, it's best to get rejected. That way, you know that the rejection won't kill you, and it helps you with confidence.
In this situation, you know that screwing up isn't that bad (you'll probably look back and laugh) and it'll help you not be so nervous next time, hence less chance of screwing up.
Rather like approaching women, the first time you do it, it's best to get rejected. That way, you know that the rejection won't kill you, and it helps you with confidence.
In this situation, you know that screwing up isn't that bad (you'll probably look back and laugh) and it'll help you not be so nervous next time, hence less chance of screwing up.
Hey man, I totally feel for you...just happened to me last week actually 
I was about to go into a gut-busting solo when my amp fried, and the audience started going "Huh? WTF?"... AND the show was recorded for TV-broadcast...
I wouldn't go as far as calling myself a fully fledged DJ, but you know how I dealt with f*cking up in front of a crazy crowd and letting my bandmates down? I LAUGHED it off!!! I genuinely found it funny, and it made for a good story! I can now use that as a short little story to tell girls just for sh*ts n giggles. My life is one level deeper now after that experience
Besides, you'd be surprised at
a) how tone deaf the audience is (once, i went onstage with one of my strings detuned by an entire note- and no one noticed!)
b) How little people care about these things. Stop being so self-conscious. "Reputation" is nothing. It can be built and destroyed in a HEARTBEAT. DJ's have more important things to worry about.
If the audience say you did good, why bother doubting them?
As a musician, you've got my respect anyways. How many people play guitar? 19326823.
How many of them have guts to play live in front of a huge live audience? Not many.
Just treat it as a positive learning experience, and stop worrying about your godamn rep.
Guitarists don't care about their rep.:rockon:
p.s ten browny points for MENTIONING petrucci. Greatest guitarist ever, no debate. DT's my favourite band.
I was about to go into a gut-busting solo when my amp fried, and the audience started going "Huh? WTF?"... AND the show was recorded for TV-broadcast...
I wouldn't go as far as calling myself a fully fledged DJ, but you know how I dealt with f*cking up in front of a crazy crowd and letting my bandmates down? I LAUGHED it off!!! I genuinely found it funny, and it made for a good story! I can now use that as a short little story to tell girls just for sh*ts n giggles. My life is one level deeper now after that experience
Besides, you'd be surprised at
a) how tone deaf the audience is (once, i went onstage with one of my strings detuned by an entire note- and no one noticed!)
b) How little people care about these things. Stop being so self-conscious. "Reputation" is nothing. It can be built and destroyed in a HEARTBEAT. DJ's have more important things to worry about.
If the audience say you did good, why bother doubting them?
As a musician, you've got my respect anyways. How many people play guitar? 19326823.
How many of them have guts to play live in front of a huge live audience? Not many.
Just treat it as a positive learning experience, and stop worrying about your godamn rep.
Guitarists don't care about their rep.:rockon:
p.s ten browny points for MENTIONING petrucci. Greatest guitarist ever, no debate. DT's my favourite band.
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.