Getting out more

ForTheBetter

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I am a 26 year old about to be divorced with 1 son. I just finished reading The Rational male, this book has opened my eyes and confirmed suspicions I have had for some time now. I have been with this girs since I was 18. My question is I'm a little rough with my game as it's been a long time and to be honest I didn't have much to start with. I am 6'2 and 230lb, I moved to her home town after we had my son and dont have friend in the area. I have started to change my physical appearance, but I need help with the game aspect, any help would be appreciated. I do t really like to go out persay, I feel awkward and cant dance. But I am trying to get into this market.
 
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Snake-eyes

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I am a 26 year old about to be divorced with 1 son. I just finished reading The Rational male, this book has opened my eyes and confirmed suspicions I have had for some time now. I have been with this girs since I was 18. My question is I'm a little rough with my game as it's been a long time and to be honest I didn't have much to start with. I am 6'2 and 230lb, I moved to her home town after we had my son and dont have friend in the area. I have started to change my physical appearance, but I need help with the game aspect, any help would be appreciated. I do t really like to go out persay, I feel awkward and cant dance. But I am trying to get into this
Do you really want to know ?
 

Amante Silvestre

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It’s fine to read up on the so-called “red pill” material, but my advice would be to avoid any PUA stuff and approaches to dating, going out with the sole purpose of getting numbers, making big changes in yourself in an effort to attract women, etc. If you’re not much of a dancer don’t go to clubs trying to hit up women on a dance floor.

It would be a good idea for you to just get out and do what you really would like to do, be as sociable and friendly as possible with women, have absolutely zero expectations for any of these encounters and just get a proper gauge in the type of women that naturally gravitate towards you first and foremost.

You can then make adjustments from there.

This can help you get a handle on what your natural traits of attraction are and where you could use some direction and improvement.

A big mistake a lot of guys in your position make is that they too often try to put on a grand dog and pony show straight out of the gates, with far too many changes and alterations to allow them to have a good idea in what is working for them out there and what isn’t.

Start simple. Socialize and mingle. Get oriented. Then proceed to improve.
 

ForTheBetter

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It’s fine to read up on the so-called “red pill” material, but my advice would be to avoid any PUA stuff and approaches to dating, going out with the sole purpose of getting numbers, making big changes in yourself in an effort to attract women, etc. If you’re not much of a dancer don’t go to clubs trying to hit up women on a dance floor.

It would be a good idea for you to just get out and do what you really would like to do, be as sociable and friendly as possible with women, have absolutely zero expectations for any of these encounters and just get a proper gauge in the type of women that naturally gravitate towards you first and foremost.

You can then make adjustments from there.

This can help you get a handle on what your natural traits of attraction are and where you could use some direction and improvement.

A big mistake a lot of guys in your position make is that they too often try to put on a grand dog and pony show straight out of the gates, with far too many changes and alterations to allow them to have a good idea in what is working for them out there and what isn’t.

Start simple. Socialize and mingle. Get oriented. Then proceed to improve.
You bring up some good points. I have been in her frame for so long it would probably be a good idea to explore the things I have wanted to do, before going all in on one thing. I keep thinking my self that I dont have much time but in reality I have only begun. Are there any other books you would suggest, that relate to where I am in life?
 
Read the 22 Rules for Massive Success with Women. Everything you need to know to become a huge success with women. And it's free!

Amante Silvestre

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You bring up some good points. I have been in her frame for so long it would probably be a good idea to explore the things I have wanted to do, before going all in on one thing. I keep thinking my self that I dont have much time but in reality I have only begun. Are there any other books you would suggest, that relate to where I am in life?
I don’t suggest a lot of reading material, videos, YouTube channels and the like. Don’t bog yourself down with all that stuff. Rollo’s stuff and the writings of Pook here in the DJ Bible is all the reading you really need. Too much is counterproductive and will stifle you. Just read through once, soak in what resonates. Don’t get caught up in studying it like it’s the ultimate blueprint though.

I’m a single dad. Been in your shoes. Have FT custody. Learn to enjoy your newfound freedom first. Just get out when you can to pursue hobbies, meeting new people, etc. Enjoy life. It’s going to serve you very well at the core of tackling women and dating again moving forward.

Use the readings as long term development material. Short term should be all about you. Most of the stuff out there will attempt to teach you how to be like that anyway.

Don’t be a monk. Go ahead and tackle whatever opportunities with women naturally arise, and if you’re enjoying life those opportunities will come. Just don’t make it this big, main focus.
 
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