Getting more involved with someone

[tactic]

First, i don't want to start anything nasty or think about doing any of those stuff that some of us might think about. I just want to get more involved with this person. I liked her about a week (or two) ago. She used to really show attention to me because i was the "new guy". Now she pays attention to other guys, she hugs them and all that and it's not because she likes them. She's older than them and she says she doesn't like anyone (i don't want arguments about how she might, to tell you guys that).

Anyway i would like to get more involved with her without making it so obvious. I'm that talkative to her because it would seem weird if a normal guy became all assertive and everything you know?

What should i do? I definetly cannot kino her and if you want to ask me why i have my reasons and it's not because i'm scared or because i don't know how. I've kino-ed many times before with other girls and i'm not doing those stuff with this particular person.

Please keep the responses clean. By that, no dirty things involved, and no "JUST TALK TO HER" comment.

I'm not a DJ, and i'll admit to that because i don't have to be a DJ since i don't try to play girls or anything with dating 100 girls anything like that. Since i'm trying to keep it simple, i just want to know how i can get some attention. That is all. Nothing else. No dirty talk, no number close, no kino, no "ask her out" move, but a way to get attention from her. I have a roller-coaster type personality. I can feel all special and confident one minute, then discouraged and angry the next.

 

[WhAcKeD!]

Be different than all of those other guys. In other words, TALK TO HER. Get to know her a little bit while keeping the mystery on your side, dont reveal to much about yourself just focus conversations on her. Try to bring some comedy in the conversations. After you get to know her a little bit, invite her out on a date and make it unique. No movies for the first date, bring her bowling or to miniature golf, sorry but your going to need to talk to her to start anything worthwhile.

 

[tactic]

She's older than me but she likes to talk to younger guys and this isn't school we are talking about. I know plenty about her and she knows plenty about me but not alot you know? I mean she knows where i live, she knows what type of person i am (quiet, but not always). I know what type of person she is, and that's why i like her. I really don't have any more to learn because i've learned everything i can about women.

BUT..

Being so knowledge-able about women does not mean you will get the attention from them, and i just learned this today. I can probaly list a million things i know about women, but i haven't done anything. I haven't been in shape recently, or for a while.

Whacked, thanks for the tip. The tip wasn't new to me but it refreshed my thinking a bit. To be HONEST with you, there are lots of things to be improved on from me.

1. Focus more on what i do,
a.My work
b.The sports i play
c.Responding to people
d.Reflex
e.Communication
f.Being more assertive outdoors

2.Style
a.I need to use more gel than water
b.Be in shape (My physicalness)
c.Wear more casual clothes
d.Show some more masculine side
e.Increase voice volume
f.Movements

My current status has greatly improved since the last few months, but i didn't think it would be this hard and i didn't think i needed much more effort in myself.

 

[strong like bull]

I have a roller-coaster type personality. I can feel all special and confident one minute, then discouraged and angry the next.

imo this should be your focus, not some silly broad. your confidence and inner game is weak. its going to be the reason of your failure. i speak from experience; one minute, youre high in the sky because some girl was attracted to you and thought you were cool. the next day, youre depressed because the same girl gives you the cold shoulder; you dont even know what for! maybe shes on her period, her grandma died, she failed a Caculus test, her boyfriend broke up with her, blah blah blah. do you want to base your emotions on how other people feel? do you want your happiness and enjoyment of life to revolve around others? or, do you want to be in touch with YOUR desires? YOUR needs? YOUR dreams? quite simply, wouldnt you rather have your strength flow from within?

that roller-coaster personality stems from your insecurity. sure, you can CARE about other peoples troubles, but DONT LET THEM RATTLE YOUR EMOTIONS.

you are investing way too much stock into her thoughts and actions. forget about her, forget about us, work on yourself. you have an outline of what needs to be done; so make it happen.

i am curious tho, as to why you want to get "more involved" with her, but without kino and without making it obvious. what do you want out of this? to be her friend? her lover? her long term partner? imo if a man whos in touch with HIS sexuality, interacts with a woman in touch with HER sexuality... the attraction WILL BE OBVIOUS. even without speaking directly regarding dating/fvcking eachother, these two sexual beings will see the sparks fly in eachothers eyes. even if you wanted to, itd be hard to hide your excitement from her. a lot of attraction signs come through in body language, moreso than words.

unless shes incredibly naive, when a man approaches and interacts with a woman, she knows its usually related to sex.


anyhow, i recommend you read this post. it elaborates on controlling your emotions.
Smooth As Anything - I speak to you from experience...
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=60825

-SLB

 

[skinnydart]

Ok, what type of relationship are you really looking for anyway?

 

[tactic]

Being closer with her.

I know, i should try to make a move on her to date me and all, wouldn't you want me to do that? Well, i don't. I'm not interested in dating or going crazy for a girl anymore. I only prefer to be either close with her or be in a deeper relationship that sets apart from friendship, a bit.

Thanks strong. Since you mentioned about having this experience, i find it a alot easier.