"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Getting her to sit on your lap...

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DJBen

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You've just turned 14 and you deadlift 250?

Can someone open a window? Something smells of bull****.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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MidwestFreek

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Originally posted by DJBen
You've just turned 14 and you deadlift 250?

Can someone open a window? Something smells of bull****.
Click to expand...
hah its not too hard to do that...when i was 14 i bet you i could have gotten 250 up..the first time i EVER deadlifted i racked up 350....then i had to take 3 months off for track...and im deadlifting again..creepin up on 400..150lbs...on a good day...but i failed to see why he even put that up there...great..so u can lift 250lbs off the ground...well too bad when ur sitting..and a girl sits on ur lap..that has NOTHING to do with pickin sh*t off the ground..unless shes THAT fat and u have to get urself off the ground..which in that case...run...
 
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DJBen

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I call bull**** because how much he deadlifts has nothing at all to do with why some girl wont sit on his lap. I just cant make any sort of logical connection anywhere to that and what he wants to achieve with the girl.

I say just chill out. If its an excuse, NEXT!
 
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