Getting dates/numbers from online dating sites, apps, etc.

[sangheilios]

So, last night I ended up signing up for POF, the first time I've given an OLD site a try in over a year, to see what was on there. I uploaded a picture of myself and started going through the profiles that were showing up on my page and came across one I was particularly interested in. Seeing the main profile picture I was already attracted to her, solid 7-8/10, and went in a bit skeptical but clicked on it and I was very surprised to say the least. The profile had over 5 pictures and a well written description, so from first glance it seemed for real. I read through it and it mentioned how she doesn't drink, smoke, do drugs, go out or have children, all what I was looking for, and then she mentioned that she exercises a lot/regularly and that she was looking for someone who was similar to her, which fits my exactly.

Anyway, she lives relatively far away but I decided to message her anyway because I knew how rare it was to find someone like that. We ended up talking on there for over 2 hours, lots of questions back and forth. It was past midnight and I had to go to bed so I told her I needed to go and that I really liked talking with her and wanted to continue to do so. I gave her my number and told her to text me and said goodnight. She quickly replied saying she would with one of those emojis smileys and said goodnight.

This is the first time I ever did this through a site or app so I'm not sure if that is the correct means of going about that or not.

 

[MrJack]

So, last night I ended up signing up for POF, the first time I've given an OLD site a try in over a year, to see what was on there. I uploaded a picture of myself and started going through the profiles that were showing up on my page and came across one I was particularly interested in. Seeing the main profile picture I was already attracted to her, solid 7-8/10, and went in a bit skeptical but clicked on it and I was very surprised to say the least. The profile had over 5 pictures and a well written description, so from first glance it seemed for real. I read through it and it mentioned how she doesn't drink, smoke, do drugs, go out or have children, all what I was looking for, and then she mentioned that she exercises a lot/regularly and that she was looking for someone who was similar to her, which fits my exactly.

Anyway, she lives relatively far away but I decided to message her anyway because I knew how rare it was to find someone like that. We ended up talking on there for over 2 hours, lots of questions back and forth. It was past midnight and I had to go to bed so I told her I needed to go and that I really liked talking with her and wanted to continue to do so. I gave her my number and told her to text me and said goodnight. She quickly replied saying she would with one of those emojis smileys and said goodnight.

This is the first time I ever did this through a site or app so I'm not sure if that is the correct means of going about that or not.

I mean she seemed to like you. In general I’ve stayed away from long convos and just send a few messages back n forth before telling her to give me her number or telling her to meet me for drinks somewhere. Basically just same as text game.

Since you’re the one who gave her your number all you can do now is wait for her to text you, banter a bit, then go for the date.

Only thing I’d say is watch out for the attention wh*res that are only on the site for validation purposes. Hard to tell in your situation but the easiest way to know or not is by going for the date and if she gives an excuse and doesn’t counter offer, she’s most likely an AW. Not always but most likely.

BTW I’ve had more luck on Bumble and Hinge over PoF. Give those a try too. Just make sure your pics are on point.

 

[sangheilios]

I mean she seemed to like you. In general I’ve stayed away from long convos and just send a few messages back n forth before telling her to give me her number or telling her to meet me for drinks somewhere. Basically just same as text game.

Since you’re the one who gave her your number all you can do now is wait for her to text you, banter a bit, then go for the date.

Only thing I’d say is watch out for the attention wh*res that are only on the site for validation purposes. Hard to tell in your situation but the easiest way to know or not is by going for the date and if she gives an excuse and doesn’t counter offer, she’s most likely an AW. Not always but most likely.

BTW I’ve had more luck on Bumble and Hinge over PoF. Give those a try too. Just make sure your pics are on point.

I've never really put my energy into online dating, I briefly tried it a couple years ago and found it to be a waste of time for the most part. I do remember messaging people back and forth a bit here and there but it never lead to anything and it seemed like they did it more out of boredom instead of out of interest. However, the one I was speaking to last night was a bit different, as she was asking me lots of questions and the conversation was going back and forth relatively quickly and for a long period of time.

That's what I was thinking, just wait for her to text me. The way I see it, if she does in fact text me she is obviously interested and getting a date/meetup should be relatively easy. I think it's better to ask for or give the number relatively quickly to avoid wasting time and not investing too much into a person you've never even met.

 

[marmel75]

I've never really put my energy into online dating, I briefly tried it a couple years ago and found it to be a waste of time for the most part. I do remember messaging people back and forth a bit here and there but it never lead to anything and it seemed like they did it more out of boredom instead of out of interest. However, the one I was speaking to last night was a bit different, as she was asking me lots of questions and the conversation was going back and forth relatively quickly and for a long period of time.

That's what I was thinking, just wait for her to text me. The way I see it, if she does in fact text me she is obviously interested and getting a date/meetup should be relatively easy. I think it's better to ask for or give the number relatively quickly to avoid wasting time and not investing too much into a person you've never even met.

When she texts you somewhere in the first message you should say "So, looks like you want to get together sometime"

 

[AttackFormation]

When she texts you somewhere in the first message you should say "So, looks like you want to get together sometime"

I agree with the spirit of meeting up, but disagree with any kind of advice like "you should do X at Y time or occasion". Imo when a girl is interested in you, your own intuition and the conversation itself will naturally influence the escalation. All he needs to "do" is keep his mind on assessing whether there's mutual interest, not forcing anything, and eventually meeting up.

 

[Murk]

I remember my first pof experience, some 19 year old from miles away got a cab for £69 to me and brought a litre of Smirnoff, think she gave me chlymidia

 

[sangheilios]

Interest is more important than technique.

A woman very interested in you will throw out her number even without you asking for it. But I have also thrown mine out first, and their interest typically compelled them to text me almost immediately to ensure I have their number in turn.

While I think it's great that the communication between the two of you was fluid enough to last 2 hours, for that time you should have walked away with a lot more than just you giving your number (her number, a date with specifics, etc). If you have not heard from her yet, she's not ready to give you her number. She's looking for more.

What do you think was missing from your conversation?

I have no idea, it was the first time I've ever really had a conversation with a person on a dating site. Looking back I should have just asked for a date and her number.

I decided to just send out another quick message to see if maybe she just wasn't ready to give out her number yet. If I don't hear anything, I'm no worse off compared to before.

 

[sangheilios]

I'm sure you're going to get some sh*t for that here, lol, but it ain't going to kill you at this point.

Worth a try, I'm not expecting anything from it but you never know. Now, if I was continuing to send messages and expecting to get a return message then we would have problems.

One thing I have heard about with online dating is women who seem to be more interested in a pen pal then actually meeting up. That's why I think it's good to have a banter back and forth for a bit but not let it get drawn out for all that long, like days or weeks of messaging.

 

[sangheilios]

Interesting. I've experienced the exact opposite of that.

I haven't experienced that but I've seen people write about that on the internet, where it seems like the woman who is more interested in talking. Most likely those women were going out with other men but keeping those guy on the side in the mean time.

 

[sangheilios]

It probably would not have mattered. She would likely have reacted to the date no differently than she did to you giving her your number.

Interest over technique. If you know you have it, any way you go about it will work.



I'm sure you're going to get some sh*t for that here, lol, but it ain't going to kill you at this point.

She actually ended up messaging me back, which I wasn't expecting. Not sure how to proceed at this point, but the way I see it I'm not investing much into this so there is nothing I can lose.

 

[EyeBRollin]

I agree with the spirit of meeting up, but disagree with any kind of advice like "you should do X at Y time or occasion". Imo when a girl is interested in you, your own intuition and the conversation itself will naturally influence the escalation. All he needs to "do" is keep his mind on assessing whether there's mutual interest, not forcing anything, and eventually meeting up.

No, you need to meet up immediately. She is nothing but a computer image until she is in front of you.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

This is the first time I ever did this through a site or app so I'm not sure if that is the correct means of going about that or not.

Online is not game.

It's female hypergamy on steroids.

I am not saying, don't do it. I am saying, leave your house and go get girls too.


It's a cesspool of fatties, slobs and attention *****s. A 7.5 girl thinks she's a 10.

You will get catfished. I know this because Tyler knows this.


As the old saying goes, beggars can't be choosers.

On a dry spell, break it. But if you are Chad status, you don't need it. Women 6+ are batting way above their SMV.

You won't. If you crushed it offline, you can online. It's low hanging fruit. Spam but spam online and offline.

It's all about abundance, options, spinning plates, stacking, #nextSet