Getting bored quickly with (new) women.

[Scought]

Lately I have started a weird cycle where I easily get bored with women.

Let me explain: I'll date around 2-3 women at one time. Usually, I'll favor one over the others, but will continue to hang out/progress with the others.
However, when things become more physical I begin to care less. It's weird and I am not articulating myself very well right now.

I'll get to know one and things will get physical. Then I will meet another and things will get physical. Sometimes, though, after getting physical, I don't really feel motivated to hang out with that person. Meaning they will call and it will take me days to call back, and I would rather hang out with myself or friends.

Sure, this is normal to a degree. However, I can't understand why I can't find a particular woman to hold my interest. Also, when I get bored of a woman I still might hang out with her, but I will start seeing another girl--the process will then repeat itself.

It's not a sex thing. To that, I mean I don't get sex and think "OK, job is done, let's go." It's just that other than a small attraction, that once acted upon, there doesn't seem to be much there.

I'll be interested in a girl..and have a genuine interest, than either time goes by, she does something I don't like, I'll meet another one (and the new-ness intrigues me) and the first one will go away slowly.

Anyone else get bored for no particular reason?

 

[WhitePimp]

I do this a lot too. It's almost like I am only interested in the getting to the sex part, and after that's done, it's time to move on. Kind of like a psychotic game to amuse myself, to see how quickly I can move to that level. I blame my gemininess

 

[NSUballer]

ha yea its kind of aggravating sometimes. i just want to find a girl that can actually hold my attention as well as I can hold hers. but yea i know what you mean by being bored. Its usually because so many girls are the same that they arent interesting enough.

 

[Jay Jay]

Yes, I have this problem

Bored or ANNOYED!!!

JJ

 

[PRMoon]

You're in the player state. You're not interested in the girls themselves but rather the challange of the hunt. After you know you've got a girl in your pocket, even if you haven't had sex, you want to move on to another. It's not a bad place to be if you're not looking for a serious relationship and can get you clout as a player.

My advice, take it in strides and soak in as much as you can about the game. Alot of people will never make it to this level.

 

[Adrian]

Don't worry this is normal. It only means that you've been in the game for too long. You need to take a break from it and conentrate on other aspects of life even more than before.

 

[NSUballer]

^^^^^HAAAAAAAAAAA!! what a funny bastard....any of you guys ever sleep with a chic and whiles shes knocked out eat her food and then bounce right out the door, then the next day the usual text message.

 

[PRMoon]

^^ you should see how this is done vegas style. We have them order a bunch of room service or booze (preferably booze) to their room, do the deed, then wait till they go to bathroom and "phantom" out. It's a quick easy way to getting free food and drink for your homies. Not so into it nowdays but once upon a time...

 

[NSUballer]

^^^^^HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! You just made my night, thats probly the most fukkked up thing Ive ever heard but so funnyy

 

[Scought]

Here is an example:

Meet girl at a club one night--exchange numbers. We meet for a drink another day so I can assess attractiveness and some sort of stable mental condidition. After a second date she is on her period, so we wait. I go to her house this Sunday afternoon, we have sex and I leave within less than 2 hours of arriving.


(This past Saturday I had a one night stand. A different girl. I don't remember much, including her name. No contact info. And it doesn't really bother me that much).

I have a date on Monday with a different girl--it's date #2. Things go well, make out, get her shirt off, but her roomate comes home (who is a guy) and we don't have sex. However, she tells me we'll get to it when he isn't around. I call today to set up another date, and she is short with me on the phone. you know, the run around game:

I say whats up, she says 'nothing'. She is stressed, doesn't say much, so than I tell her I gotta go, and when she wants to hang out she can call me.

I already know that if I would have had sex with her the other night, I would have had less interest. As I am now more interested in getting things further with her than anything else. Likewise, the first girl I hang out with called me on Monday and I have yet to call her back.

See the ebb and flow. It does sound as I like the chase more. But, I also don't want to deal with the BS of dealing with a girl who is 'stressed' to have some sex.

What are my next thoughts now:

I can't wait for the weekend to meet a new women.
Second, that the girl I didn't have sex with his hot, but that she lives with a male roomate and that sounds like some real problems and something I dont want to deal with, and its enough to know that I will not pursue any type of 'potential' relationship with her. (This is for another thread, but male roomates are just too much for me at least. His guy friends come over, what happens when a woman comes home drunk and horny and no one but male roomate is there...its just not for me).

So, that's where I am at.
most of my life I had always seen potential in women. Today, it's quite contrary. And, no, I don't want a relationship. Just give a chance of 'potential' is all.

 

[NSUballer]

HAAAAAAAAA...Yea sex with hot women is awesome...as well as meeting new hot women...Im sure one girl will come along and grab your attention, or youll be a lonely bastard

 

[PRMoon]

To the op: I have to reiderate, if you find that you can cite reasons why you don't want to put forth the effort to have sex with a girl, then you've got the mentality of a player. There are plenty of fish in the sea and you know you've got good bait so why stress yourself? You're letting them do the work, which is a good thing. It's a different road then the one you're use to but when it hits you as to exactly what's happening you'll view the situation differently.

Everybody else... Crazy stunts like that are the norm around these parts. We push the envelope and live the dream at will.

 

[MacDiddy]

I feel sorry for you scough... Its definitely pychological problem you have. Perhaps you need to search for additional meaning in your life besides women.

 

[comic_relief]

^^ Espi, I know how you feel. I took a year off to study for my board exams. Then after I took them and passed them..

BAM MAJOR DEPRESSION. Bro, I couldnt figure out why!!!

It wasn't until just now, when I start up with my career that the depression left.

We are funny creatures man, its obvious we value our academic pursuits more than anything. Its a good character trait though.

this is why when I work out my future goals, I have something so impossibly large that it is impossible to accomplish. My large goals includes semi-retiring at the age of 45 then raise at least a billion dollars for different non-profit organizations. I know that it is impossible to do (or just extremely unlikely), but I act as if it is impossible to fail anyways.

I find that when you constantly have goals, that you will never be bored or depressed. It's those things that we constantly work towards having that makes it all worth it.

Find a goal that stretches you.

comic_relief

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

...Anyone else get bored for no particular reason?

Lack of sarging purposely perhaps?

 

[Scought]

Appreciate the comments.

This certainly isn't a 'psychologica; problem' as one poster suggested.

All I am saying is that I get to a certain level with a girl and hanging out with her/advancing things, no longer becomes fun.

Maybe Plastic is right. Maybe I am not challenging myself enough to go for the real cream of the crop.

It's just something I have noticed and I am glad others have been through it.
I think it is just that something I might have placed high value on when I was younger, has lost its value now that I have found that it can be had for not much effort at all.

It's like meeting your idol and finding out what a jerk he is. You kind of get left saying: OK, now what?

I think, in the long run, this is good. I think it will help me better weed out girls, and focus on girls that I have good qualities. Whereas, in the past I was just going for girls because they were attractive and nothing else. Now, I can get past 'looks' and go for the women with 'looks' and genuineness.

To others that suggest I need more 'activities.' That really isn't the case. Weekdays are filled with doing work/pursuing goals. Weekends are for going out with friends and (perhaps) meeting women.

 

[Tha Realnezz]

Sh1t by the time I get the number on paper and I turn around to leave,..i'm already debating in my head if that girl is even worthy of ****ing me..

If I see a betterlooking,just flat out cooler chic before I set up the date ..then that girl will be history...

That's just the way I work...

I lose interest immediatley almost..

 

[comic_relief]

Comic, great post... thing is, its just recently at the age of 26, that I realize that BOREDOM = DEPRESSION. I've been busy my whole life. And when I finally take time off I think its going to be the greatest thing in the world. In fact, its quite possibly the most horrible thing to happen to me. Luckily Im moving and starting a fresh and starting work.

Boredom totally sucks. It explains why people who retire still try to find some kind of work.

means a lot coming from you Plastic. I guess I should consider myself lucky that figured this out two years ago.

Also to Scought,

I realize that I wish that I could help you out, but my guess is that eventually you will find a girl that will interest you enough for you to find a girl. For now, just have fun with your life. I have the complete opposite problem, I like LTR's because I like to find out how a person ticks. It's just a helluva lot of fun for me to have.

comic_relief

 

[Adrian]

Appreciate the comments.

This certainly isn't a 'psychologica; problem' as one poster suggested.

All I am saying is that I get to a certain level with a girl and hanging out with her/advancing things, no longer becomes fun.

Maybe Plastic is right. Maybe I am not challenging myself enough to go for the real cream of the crop.

It's just something I have noticed and I am glad others have been through it.
I think it is just that something I might have placed high value on when I was younger, has lost its value now that I have found that it can be had for not much effort at all.

It's like meeting your idol and finding out what a jerk he is. You kind of get left saying: OK, now what?

I think, in the long run, this is good. I think it will help me better weed out girls, and focus on girls that I have good qualities. Whereas, in the past I was just going for girls because they were attractive and nothing else. Now, I can get past 'looks' and go for the women with 'looks' and genuineness.

To others that suggest I need more 'activities.' That really isn't the case. Weekdays are filled with doing work/pursuing goals. Weekends are for going out with friends and (perhaps) meeting women.

It's all part of being in the game for too long man, I'm telling you. It would mess you up like this.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

...It's all part of being in the game for too long man, I'm telling you. It would mess you up like this.

The game is difficult either when you don't know the rules, don't know how to play or don't know how to score. Being out on the court running around in circles doesn't do you any good.