Gave her an ultimatum, she responds, what do i do now?

[justsomeguy1984]

Okay, well my girlfriend has been rather ****ty to me lately. She's very disrespectful and I seem to be her last priority these days (she basically hangs out with everyone of her friends except me). Now I know that these are obvious signs that a breakup may be looming. but when I suggested to her that this is what she wants, she insisted that wants to stay with me and that she still loves me. We have been together for 2 years now.

Well yesterday afternoon i spoke with her on the phone. She was going out with her friends, but promised to call me later... 1 AM came around and she still hadn't called. I have been trying to be non-chalant and give her her space through all of this, but this disrespectful act was the last straw for me. I sent her a text letting her know that I wasn't happy about this, a then I told her that I wanted the diamond ring that I gave her back. She texted back a few minutes later saying that she doesn't want me to leave her. Then she sent another text right after that asking if she could come over to my house to see me tomorrow after work.

My question is, how should i react to this?.. Her coming over and being with me is what I want, but I feel like she is only doing it because she knows I am at a breaking point with her (she hasn't wanted to hang out with me very often, if at all, lately)..

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

She doesn't want you to dump her.... but 50 bucks says she'll be the one dumping you.

Trust your gut on this one. It knows. If you feel she's not into you anymore, then beat her to the punch and dump her.

Let her come over, and give her a chance to explain herself. If she doesn't give you anything worth hearing..... just end it.

You can walk away with your pride intact

 

[brucevangeorge]

Get rid of her.

If she comes back then you know that she still wants to be with you.

Until then... maybe she's worried about losing that purdy diamon ring you got her? Or maybe she's worried that things will end too soon before she has a chance to take you for all the $$$$ you got.

 

[flippinfreak]

If she wears it when she comes over. I say you fvck her til the break of dawn, lick her hands until you have the ring in your finger. slip it off, look at it in the sun...

"Been great babe" COme back for more tomorrow, and we can talk.

Than kick her out of your house.

 

[00Kevin]

the first task is for you to take that ring back even if you have to pull it off her finger

Get that ring!

The problem is that you have made a promise to her and she has failed to show you any respect. The fact is she should be madly in love with you at this point. If she doesn't know how to show you respect at this point I would say that marriage with her would be very short.

You take the ring back and tell her in few words what the problem is. Then you tell her you need time to think things over.

This is a very serious situation because it involves your future.

Your gut instincts are telling you that she should not hold that ring. Remember a man is not afraid to demand respect from a woman.

 

[justsomeguy1984]

00Kevin-

That sounds like good advice. I was very serious when I told her that I wanted the ring back, I wasn't just saying it to get her attention or to upset her.

I realize that it is my fault that the relationship has come to this. She has no respect for me anymore because in the past I spoiled the **** out of her and gave her basically whatever she wanted (hell, you already know I bought her a diamond ring! It isn't a cheap one either!) I have a feeling that she really DOES want to stay with me, but she takes me for granted so much and puts me on the bottom of my priority list because she knows that i will always be there. No more. I need to set her straight.

It just really bugs me that she only wants to come over when she is faced with the threat of losing her ring. I'd almost rather NOT see her at all then to see her only because she feels bad or threatend. I don't even know what to say to her..

 

[hitchcock1]

as someone who's been in a similar situation, i can say that if you end it volutarily, you'll be in a much better situation. specifically, she'll feel less power over you, you won't be thinking so much "what went wrong that she broke up with me" because YOU're the one who did it, and she may even get a wake up call and change her ways.

so see her after work and then end it off if it doesn't look good. the other guy was right, trust your gut, it doesn't JUST know about good food.

 

[donpepot]

well if your gonna do it right..she may not dump you.....
in your situation...there is 3 things you should do..


1.DONT BE TAKEN FOR GRANTED
2.GIVE HER SOME TERMS
3.BE A CHALLENGE

 

[S1NN3R]

Get the ring back no matter what happens or what she says or what you decide to do. It will show her that you are not playing around.

Then, I would basically say to her that it doesn't matter how many times she says she doesn't want to lose me, unless she starts showing it immediately, then she already has....

 

[justsomeguy1984]

Yeah, actions speak louder than words, and her words are definately not matching her actions. I've decided that no matter what, even if she comes to me begging and promising to change, I'm going to get that ring back..

Here is what complicates things for me...this girl is smoking hot! I mean i'm talking about a 9.8 or 9.9.. And yeah, i know that shouldn't matter if she is treating me like ****, but she didn't used to be that way. She used to be sweet and for a long time we had a great relationship.. The other night I went out to a club without her (not to cheat, just looking to dance with some girls and take my mind off of her) and I looked around the club and I was like "damn, there is not a single girl in this place who is anywhere close as hot as my girl!"

So you guys that are saying just dump her now, yeah, i know that is probably the right thing to do, but you have to admit that dumping a 9.9 is 1,000 times harder than dumping a 6 or a 7! Either way I know it is time for me to stand up and be a man about things and lay down the law. Hopefully me taking my ring back will open up her eyes that she could lose me (if she does actually want to stay with me as she claims..)

 

[brucevangeorge]

00Kevin-

That sounds like good advice. I was very serious when I told her that I wanted the ring back, I wasn't just saying it to get her attention or to upset her.

I realize that it is my fault that the relationship has come to this. She has no respect for me anymore because in the past I spoiled the **** out of her and gave her basically whatever she wanted (hell, you already know I bought her a diamond ring! It isn't a cheap one either!) I have a feeling that she really DOES want to stay with me, but she takes me for granted so much and puts me on the bottom of my priority list because she knows that i will always be there. No more. I need to set her straight.

It just really bugs me that she only wants to come over when she is faced with the threat of losing her ring. I'd almost rather NOT see her at all then to see her only because she feels bad or threatend. I don't even know what to say to her..

Of course she genuinely wants to get back with you! She gets all her monetary needs fufilled by you and she has to show nothing in return.

She genuinely wants to get back with your money. You better believe it, she does and you can see it.. can't you?

 

[brucevangeorge]

well if your gonna do it right..she may not dump you.....
in your situation...there is 3 things you should do..


1.DONT BE TAKEN FOR GRANTED
2.GIVE HER SOME TERMS
3.BE A CHALLENGE

4. TAKE BACK YOUR STUFF AND MAKE HER WORK FOR IT THIS TIME.
5. GET RID OF HER BEFORE SHE GETS ANY WORSE.

 

[MotoXXX]

Hey buddy I was in this same situation. Never Never Never second guess your gut!!!! I will assure you if you take the ring back your relationship will never be the same, she will think that you are just using the "diamond ring" as a pawn in your relationship. I admit nexting an 8 or above is not easy, but it is not hard if you arent happy either. My ex was a 9+ easy but when sh!t goes bad it goes bad for a reason. I didnt see any chicks that I thought were hotter then my ex the first out to the club either, but after you make yourself the catch to the women, many many hotties are gonna be after you.
My advice is a compilation of everyone elses.....
1. let her come over
2. beat that pvssy up like it owes you money
3. get the ring back
4. forget everything you know about her and move on

 

[justsomeguy1984]

Hey buddy I was in this same situation. Never Never Never second guess your gut!!!! I will assure you if you take the ring back your relationship will never be the same, she will think that you are just using the "diamond ring" as a pawn in your relationship. I admit nexting an 8 or above is not easy, but it is not hard if you arent happy either. My ex was a 9+ easy but when sh!t goes bad it goes bad for a reason. I didnt see any chicks that I thought were hotter then my ex the first out to the club either, but after you make yourself the catch to the women, many many hotties are gonna be after you.
My advice is a compilation of everyone elses.....
1. let her come over
2. beat that pvssy up like it owes you money
3. get the ring back
4. forget everything you know about her and move on

I don't intend to use the ring as a pawn. Once I take it back I'm not going to mention anything about it again until I decide to give it back (if that ever happens..)

 

[jigga23]

Seriously leave her first,dude i was basically in the same situation with my ex a little bit ago except there was no ring invovled. we were together for almost 2 years and living together had a dog, joint things etc. she started to become disrespectful same thing hanging w/ her friends all the time on the weekeneds we never did anything fun anymore. she went home for vacation i guess her best friend told her to get rid of me or convinced her. she comes back after being gone for a month i fvck her and i could tell she cheated on me unless she brought a dildo with her. anyways she doesnt let me pick her up from the airport she even doesnt tell me shes staying an extra day. over the phone shes like im sorry about what im about to do or something stupid like that. she gets home we talk and i tell her im done with her and going to leave. then she starts saying i dont want that. the next day she does something again so i actually start packing my sh!t. she says what are you doing? i say im leaving you wanted this right. of course she says no. so i stay. a week goes by we go out to the bars we get drunk i say to her do you want to marry me and she says yes and you better propose in a cute way. 2 days later i get canned from my job (manager and i had major issues). i have a couple of interviews set up and everything. seems like she was there for support. the saturday after i get fired she starts acting really dumb like upset and wont talk about it it was obvioulsy about me. i try to talk it out she doesnt even want it and found it more important to meet her friends up. she left the house i packed up my sh!t and just left. we didnt even talk the next day i had to call her. she came to see me a couple of times we fvcked and sh!t for about 2 months. I come to later find out that shes now seeing some dude that 2 of her best friends were fighting over when i was living with her, one was her roomate and were both fvcking him. shes a piece of sh!t and a dirty selfish ho.

moral of the story is get rid of her first. she said she didnt want me to leave when i showed that i would. but she beat me to the punch. you gotta leave her first teach her a lesson for acting like this. grow some balls and just do it. dont be a pvssy like i was otherwise your screwed. if you leave her if she wants you shell call and just let her know you did it cause you didnt like the situation and how she was acting. tell her you cant be with someone who acts like that. dont turn it into something involving her friends cause then shell think your jealous and feel that your making her chose. just say shes disrespectful and taking you for granted. Dude ive been there you dont have to take my advice but i think it should guide you in the right direction. IF YOU WANT THIS TO WORK OUT OR HAVE A BETTER CHANCE LEAVE HER FIRST AND YOULL HAVE AN IDLE SITUATION, DECIDING IF YOU WANT HER BACK OR NOT.

 

[brucevangeorge]

I don't intend to use the ring as a pawn. Once I take it back I'm not going to mention anything about it again until I decide to give it back (if that ever happens..)

Give her a fake one in return. You know... the kind they have in the gumball machines?

I guarantee you wil feel alot better when you see her reaction when you giver her that piece of crap and kicking her out the door rather than giving her nothing in return.

 

[brucevangeorge]

jigga23 I like your post. It really speaks the truth, but the bottom line is that you are speaking to a wall.

How can you tell a pvssy like the above poster to grow a pair? It's not going to happen. He's just going to get dumped and he'll be kicking himself around for not doing it first to that ho.

Save it for someone who is willing to listen.


To the poster: I say great job! WOOOOO!!! You DA man!

Stay with that disrespectful supplicating ho. Let it be a lesson to you when she dumps your ass and you find out what she's been doing behind your back. You have been given the greatest advice here on this thread, but you're not going to do anything. Cause you're a pvssy.

HAHAHAHAHAHA!!



You're so screwed.

 

[Nausicaa]

Women hate ultimatums. I wouldn't even let her come over. Verball tell her you're breaking up, or just resist the urge to communicate with her for a while and give her more space than she wants. She might find she was wrong and come running back, otherwise, it's over and you were the one in control, not feeling like a tool.

 

[KontrollerX]

Please for your own good listen to jigga.

You will be incredibly sorry if you don't.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

I've yet to find women who were completely nice and then became sh1tty, it may not be strong but there's always a scent of sh1ttiness. Given that, why the hell did she do to deserve a diamond ring? Oh yeah, I seriously doubt that she'll give it back.