In my past experience, when things went well with women, they were usually cosmic (actually they still often are). Things girls say don't matter because they conform 100%. It's almost like dealing with junkies. Work, school or whatever responsibilities become secondary. The problem is that I don't like this subservience very much. It's unattractive. Yet, when I get too much push back from women who are INDEPENDENT, it's hard to gauge if it's because they don't like me or if I'm just being too sensitive. It's like going from the super obvious to the opposite!
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Gauging interest in women who legitimately have a lot going on
- Thread starter Crow
- Start date
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Trail Mix-A-Lot
New Member
I don't post much. I love this forum and have been a member for some years now.
I have pretty strong convictions about the question in your post. I think with women it's pretty simple. People do what the want to do. I firmly believe this. If a woman is interested in you, busy or not, you will know it you will have no doubts.
Now I have a big ego, and it's burned me plenty of times in the past. I've held out to spend time with a "busy" woman. All the while telling myself, "Wow she must really have a lot going on..."
The truth was that she was mildly interested but I wasn't her No. 1 choice. I was the Plan B or the fallback guy.
Truth-be-told when a woman is truly interested you, you'll almost feel as if she's a touch "stalker-ish", really. Anything less shows that she is only somewhat interested.
I am casually dating a woman now who has *tons* of stuff going on in her life. Super demanding job, Scads of friends (both male and female), very active in community and local government. She is super interested in me. I'm shocked, and frankly feel somewhat smothered, by the amount of attention she bestows on me.
I'm a hard liner (possibly to a fault). If I get a Number, I'll ask a girl out one time. If she says she's busy or unavailable in any way-shape-or-form, I'm out. The end. Even if she offers up an alternative date.
-Trail-
I have pretty strong convictions about the question in your post. I think with women it's pretty simple. People do what the want to do. I firmly believe this. If a woman is interested in you, busy or not, you will know it you will have no doubts.
Now I have a big ego, and it's burned me plenty of times in the past. I've held out to spend time with a "busy" woman. All the while telling myself, "Wow she must really have a lot going on..."
The truth was that she was mildly interested but I wasn't her No. 1 choice. I was the Plan B or the fallback guy.
Truth-be-told when a woman is truly interested you, you'll almost feel as if she's a touch "stalker-ish", really. Anything less shows that she is only somewhat interested.
I am casually dating a woman now who has *tons* of stuff going on in her life. Super demanding job, Scads of friends (both male and female), very active in community and local government. She is super interested in me. I'm shocked, and frankly feel somewhat smothered, by the amount of attention she bestows on me.
I'm a hard liner (possibly to a fault). If I get a Number, I'll ask a girl out one time. If she says she's busy or unavailable in any way-shape-or-form, I'm out. The end. Even if she offers up an alternative date.
-Trail-
jophil28
Master Don Juan
Not sure about cutting her loose if she offers an alternative. By suggesting another place and another time, she is returning your invitation, and your interest.Trail Mix-A-Lot said:I'm a hard liner (possibly to a fault). If I get a Number, I'll ask a girl out one time. If she says she's busy or unavailable in any way-shape-or-form, I'm out. The end. Even if she offers up an alternative date.
-Trail-
DMSR76
Senior Don Juan
I agree with this as well. However, I will accept one 1st meeting/date counteroffer. No counteroffer... I'm out.Trail Mix-A-Lot said:I don't post much. I love this forum and have been a member for some years now.
I have pretty strong convictions about the question in your post. I think with women it's pretty simple. People do what the want to do. I firmly believe this. If a woman is interested in you, busy or not, you will know it you will have no doubts.
Now I have a big ego, and it's burned me plenty of times in the past. I've held out to spend time with a "busy" woman. All the while telling myself, "Wow she must really have a lot going on..."
The truth was that she was mildly interested but I wasn't her No. 1 choice. I was the Plan B or the fallback guy.
Truth-be-told when a woman is truly interested you, you'll almost feel as if she's a touch "stalker-ish", really. Anything less shows that she is only somewhat interested.
I am casually dating a woman now who has *tons* of stuff going on in her life. Super demanding job, Scads of friends (both male and female), very active in community and local government. She is super interested in me. I'm shocked, and frankly feel somewhat smothered, by the amount of attention she bestows on me.
I'm a hard liner (possibly to a fault). If I get a Number, I'll ask a girl out one time. If she says she's busy or unavailable in any way-shape-or-form, I'm out. The end. Even if she offers up an alternative date.
-Trail-
jophil28
Master Don Juan
Yes, true enough. ^Trail Mix-A-Lot said:Truth-be-told when a woman is truly interested you, you'll almost feel as if she's a touch "stalker-ish", really. Anything less shows that she is only somewhat interested.
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A woman with high IL will act in ways that leave no doubt. Problem is that most women take a little time (and DJ effort by you) to reach boiling temperature.
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.