"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Gaining Muscle & Definition At The Age Of 40

soulforge

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Hi guys

just want your opinion on training in your 40's

off course as you get older, it becomes increasing harder to make gains..

my question is, if I keep training, will I still make gains and improved definition?

also I am finding it much harder to keep off the belly fat..

any tips for losing belly fat, without sacrificing muscle????
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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EyeBRollin

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Lift heavy. You MUST work up to doing heavy squats and deadlifts. Nothing engages the center of your body like those two exercises.

Get serious about cardio. Shed baby shed. Take up running, rowing, swimming, cycling, or even a sport like basketball. I recommend the bicycle always, as it has the least amount of stress on your joints (like swimming) but it's comfortable enough to do for extended periods of time. Even beginners can pick up a bike and ride 10 miles. Try doing local errands on a bike.

Diet diet diet. As you get older, carbs gotta go. Curtail your drinking. Save it for special occasions.
 

soulforge

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Lift heavy. You MUST work up to doing heavy squats and deadlifts. Nothing engages the center of your body like those two exercises.

Get serious about cardio. Shed baby shed. Take up running, rowing, swimming, cycling, or even a sport like basketball. I recommend the bicycle always, as it has the least amount of stress on your joints (like swimming) but it's comfortable enough to do for extended periods of time. Even beginners can pick up a bike and ride 10 miles. Try doing local errands on a bike.

Diet diet diet. As you get older, carbs gotta go. Curtail your drinking. Save it for special occasions.
I struggle with my lower back, have been prone to getting lower back strain..

so squatting worries me a little.. as I may pull my lower back, and have to take a break from training till I recover.

I do have a good belt to wear for support, so maybe that is an option..

what other option is there for hitting the mid body, or belly area..

I will defo be increasing the amount of cardio I do from here on, and cut down the carbs a little..

altho I feel I do need some carbs for energy before a gym session.. usually brown rice.

can cardio result in muscle loss??
 

EyeBRollin

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Ab exercises are basically useless.. they don't engage the abdominal sttabilizing muscles to get that deep core definition like squats and deadlifts will. Overhead press is a lot of core as well.

I would try to do them anyway, just start extremely light and work your way up slowly. Check out Stronglifts 5X5 and Starting Strength. They are guarenteed to work. Throw in some cardio and you're golden.
 

speed dawg

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I struggle with my lower back, have been prone to getting lower back strain..

so squatting worries me a little.. as I may pull my lower back, and have to take a break from training till I recover.

I do have a good belt to wear for support, so maybe that is an option..

what other option is there for hitting the mid body, or belly area..

I will defo be increasing the amount of cardio I do from here on, and cut down the carbs a little..

altho I feel I do need some carbs for energy before a gym session.. usually brown rice.

can cardio result in muscle loss??
Go light and work your way up. I've had lower back surgery too, and this has worked for me. I started with air, then the bar, then 25s, you get the picture. I still don't go heavy, but they are the best exercise bar none (no pun intended).
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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marmel75

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Hi guys

just want your opinion on training in your 40's

off course as you get older, it becomes increasing harder to make gains..

my question is, if I keep training, will I still make gains and improved definition?

also I am finding it much harder to keep off the belly fat..

any tips for losing belly fat, without sacrificing muscle????
Yes, get your T levels checked and talk to your doctor about the benefits of TRT if need be...and by need be, I mean anything under 500 is too low...

Gaining abdominal fat is pretty much a tell tale sign of lowered testosterone, which makes sense as T levels start declining in your 30s...
 

ubercat

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Be careful a lower back injury is no joke. It's what knocks a lot of guys in their forties out of Sports. I'm in my fifties and still play A grade tennis and train in martial arts so I know about injuries. I agree with speeddwg do the exercises but build up from almost nothing.

There's plenty of yoga on YouTube and you can torrent DVDs of it. There are yoga back strengthening routines. I would strongly suggest that as a good counterbalance to the weight training. If you go down the testosterone supplement path check out the science. Recent studies have suggested that low dosage can get you the benefits without the risks prime being prostate cancer.
 

soulforge

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From the perspective of an exceptionally fit, 46-year-old:

It's just as hard for me to do as it was in my twenties. Or thirties. Or ANY age. It's ALWAYS hard to do.

For me gains NEVER came easier at 26, nor do they come harder at 46.

Here's some solid advice about staying lean and mean:

Exercise more. Eat less. Forgo your love of food and drink for awhile.
I always believed eating more helps to make gains and size??

Why eat less??
 

soulforge

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This is my personal opinion (and I expect varying opinions on this):

If your objective is to lose belly fat, you MUST eat less and exercise more.

Less food and drink and more exercise=leaner body. It's that simple. The reason you have excess belly fat is because you're eating more and exercising less.

I eat at least 4 times a day.. and I am lifting weights usually 5 times a week..

What could be a causing factor to the belly fat, is not getting in enough cardio..

I have been doing cardio once a week.. i have not increased this to 3 times a week.

And started squatting and dead lifts, twice a week too
 

ubercat

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Latest research courtesy of Dr Mosley again. You have to eat in the 12 hour window since you get up. So if you get up at 6 you want to be having dinner by 6:30 Max. Guys burn more fat in the day if they exercise in the morning before they eat. Also dinner should be your smallest meal with very low carb say a salad and palm of your hand size protein.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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switch7

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I struggle with my lower back, have been prone to getting lower back strain..

so squatting worries me a little.. as I may pull my lower back, and have to take a break from training till I recover.

I do have a good belt to wear for support, so maybe that is an option..

what other option is there for hitting the mid body, or belly area..

I will defo be increasing the amount of cardio I do from here on, and cut down the carbs a little..

altho I feel I do need some carbs for energy before a gym session.. usually brown rice.

can cardio result in muscle loss??

Leg muscles seem to react more to higher reps, so the weight on the bar doesn't need to be insane. I usually go for between 20 and 30 reps. But obviously this weight will get heavier with time...
 
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I'm on the the high protein mid carbs mid low fat for my macros. In my mid 40s but do not have Greek god status. Time is an issue for me. I can only find time to work out 4 times a week due to traveling or time constraints. I'm thinking of going on the keto diet and incorporating thenx calisthenics that way I could workout more since there are little to no weights needed when I travel.

If your looking for Greek god status there are only two ways I have seen it and i'm anti way #2

#1 have the genetics for it and diet is 80% along with an ungodly workout ethic beast mode in the gym for years.

#2 have most of the genetics for it diet is 80% of it along with Mexican supplements (TRT, winstrial etc..) ungodly workout ethic beast mode in the gym for 4 months .
 
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