g/f depressed, what do I do???

[Josh_rugged]

My girlfriend was acting strange for about 2 or so months, didn't know what was going on, started hanging with her friends a ton more, and not making any time for me. Last night, I got upset with her, told her shes different now.

She spilled her problem about not knowing her dad when she was younger, and still doesn't. Said shes very depressed and doesn't appreciate anything anymore. Possibably has to take medication or talk to a professional. We are so good together, and we both feel the same about each other.

So my question is, how can I help her feel better, what can I do that will give her life meaning and make her happy???

 

[Slickster]

If she is truly clinically depressed she needs more help than you can give.

I'm sure she's been happy before (you say she's changed over the past 2 months.) It may be a phase but it is up to her to find a reason to be happy.

Your gf's happiness isn't your responsibility.

 

[DeathDealer]

She might be depressed or not. I dunno. I do know one thing:

When a girl starts hanging out with her friends more than you, that is always a bad sign that she is getting ready to dump you.

 

[thefonz]

are you guys seriously attached? Are you honestly ready to deal with the problems you will encounter of trying to solve a girls depression? Are you willing to accept the fact that maybe after putting in enormous amounts of effort and putting the weight of her depression on to that when all is said and done nothing will be resolved? If you answered no to any of the questions i'd say ditch her.

I remember having a friend who had a herion problem and i put effort into trying to help him. He would come crying to me about how aweful his life was and how it hurt so bad to be on it. I'd talk to him ad-naseum about mind control and thought patterns and changing the enviroment and people around you to get your life on track. At one time i considered him a close friend and when i spoke to him he seemed to comprehend what i was saying saying "Ya, Ya dude your completly on the money, I know, I know". Come to find out a week later he would be coming to me talking about how he shot up with one of his old buddies and describing how great it felt (despite our endless talks about this as if they never occured). Later on people began approaching me saying he was talking mad **** about me saying how stupid i was and other little things i did annoyed him. He has been going in and out of rehab for over a year. The point is depressed people are too emotional for you to even risk getting attached to, you always end up making their problems your own, be ready to deal with that.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Dude, just tell her that you'll be there for her when she needs you and leave it at that. If she confides in you, just be empathic, do NOT try to solve her problem unless she asks for your advice. Yeah, you could probably become an emotional tampon but that's always a possibility in a LTR.

 

[Elevenbravo]

Cant cure depression with happy thoughts. Need medical help for that.

 

[NRM]

You people now are crazy.

How do you conclude that you both feel the SAME way about eachother? Does she treat you that great? Is she upset that she doesn't get to see you anymore?

You don't speak for her. Her actions speak for themselves.

As a boyfriend, she should be so happy to see you that her depression goes away. She can't help but to happy around you, because you're that great. Obviously she's great enough for you wanting to help her, but why is it that she isn't as depressed about not seeing you as you are seeing her?

I tell you this now. If you aren't in a happy relationship, give it up and move on. What's the point otherwise? Why not go find someone else to make you happy and she'll maybe find someone else that actually makes her happy and cures her depression with just his presense?

 

[gmm567]

**** her.

She needs to be ****ed.

Ejaculate contains a very powerful anti-depressant.

 

[Nightwing]

Originally posted by Josh_rugged
My girlfriend was acting strange for about 2 or so months, didn't know what was going on, started hanging with her friends a ton more, and not making any time for me. Last night, I got upset with her, told her shes different now.

She spilled her problem about not knowing her dad when she was younger, and still doesn't. Said shes very depressed and doesn't appreciate anything anymore. Possibably has to take medication or talk to a professional. We are so good together, and we both feel the same about each other.

So my question is, how can I help her feel better, what can I do that will give her life meaning and make her happy???

She didnt know her dad when she met you and wasnt giving you the funny treatment then, so why is she now is my question. There seems like there's more to it than that.

 

[myfriendblu]

nothing you can do. as posted above, her happiness is NOT your problem. Maybe you should be looking to move on. NEXT.

 

[thefonz]

sorry josh, guess the overwhelming opinion is lose the zero get with a hero

 

[Big Pappy]

Hate to say it, but she's not telling you everything.

1. You two are bf/gf.
2. Instead of telling you what's really bugging you, she's making this up. If this were her real problem, she wouldn't be hanging around her friends, either. She'd be talking with her mom or a sister.

I could very easily be wrong, but that's just what I think.

Don't throw around this "depression" verdict. Depression is best left diagnosed by a trained professional.

The best thing you can do is to tell her to not feel sorry for herself. No amount of depression is going to change anything. She controls how she feels. Not you, not daddy.

 

[myfriendblu]

Originally posted by Big Pappy


Don't throw around this "depression" verdict. Depression is best left diagnosed by a trained professional.

.

Pappy...i kinda disagree. Yea, he can't properly diagnose her as depressed. However, I can usually tell from the sound of a noise a car is making and come up with what is wrong with it. And Im not a certified mechanic. Depression is similar. If you have read up a bit on it and studied it, the warning signs, the "Car sounds" are there, and like a mechanic, you don't have to be certified to come up with good solid conclusions on your own.

 

[Scrumtulescence]

As a boyfriend, she should be so happy to see you that her depression goes away.

Thank you for your thoughts and feelings on clinical depression, doctor.

All sarcasm aside, you're full of crap and are speaking on an issue of which you know nothing about.

If she is truly depressed, which she may or may not be, Slickster is right and she needs more help than you can give her. Meds are given out like candy these days, although for some people they do help, but she should at least get some therapy if she's feeling really depressed and has 'daddy issues'.

If this were her real problem, she wouldn't be hanging around her friends, either. She'd be talking with her mom or a sister.

Not necessarily true.