Friend who's a girl is very upset

[CherryBreaker]

Okay, I went clubbing with a very good friend of mine whose a chick and I've known for over a year. She's hot but I know she's not good girlfriend material because she is very selfish, I repeat very selfish so instead of trying to hook up a date with her, I use my DJ skills to use her to get other girls which worked very well until a couple of weeks ago.

Usually, I get a girls number and head right back to talking to her except for this one night where this one girl I hooked up with earlier gave me an excuse to give her a ride home since she wanted to hang out with me the whole night. I said sure, who wouldn't right? Well, after I dropped off my gal friend, both me and this chick hit it off back at my place. I'm not interested in this girl but when the blood starts draining down there, you don't think straight anymore. Well you know what happened.

But back to the main issue, if you reverse this situation, it's happened with her where she would just leave me and go off with another dude while I drive home myself. It doesn't matter to me because we help each other hooking up so it's cool and plus we're friends.

Well, after that incident with me taking home a girl, my gal friend now no longer talks to me, hangs out with me, nothing! Nada!

She says we're just friends but gets all emotional and upset because I slept with another chick? Should I try to reason with her or just ignore her?

 

[Black_Italian]

Break into her house while she is sleeping in a ninja suit and walk up to her bed pull out your penis and slap her with it. It will set her straight.

Ninja out

 

[Big Eee Zee]

you certainly do like slapping things with your penis...

 

[NewMan]

Forget this chick.

Get yourself a good wingman.

 

[Aisujin]

Special Ninja penis strike!!!

:crackup:

 

[flexion_]

Does she like you? If not I'd just ignore it - most likely she was just a bit jealous you got some action and she didn't. If she is a friend of your she'll be in touch and apologize etc...

 

[DreamyChick]

I agree. I think she either likes you and/or is jealous that you are getting some attention. I should know I recently had a guy friend tell me he had amazing sex and it made me realize I was infatuated and jealous.

 

[Wyldfire]

She clearly has feelings for you and she's hurt that you were with someone else. She's just like the guy who secretly has feelings for his female friend and probably most of the guys who are posting here have been exactly where she is and has felt what she's feeling.

If you genuinely like this girl as a person I'll say this much...the best relationships you can have are ones that blossom out of friendship.

 

[DreamyChick]

Originally posted by Wyldfire

If you genuinely like this girl as a person I'll say this much...the best relationships you can have are ones that blossom out of friendship.

I wish more guys would realize that.

 

[Tboner]

"She says we're just friends but gets all emotional and upset because I slept with another chick? Should I try to reason with her or just ignore her?" - CherryBreaker

Don't ever try to reason with a woman about feelings. You need to ignore her until she appologizes and makes it up to you. Then, test her by gaming her and going for the lay. She is either:

1. sexually attracted to you in which case you'll lay her easily. Since you said she's not GF material, you could become FB's.

2. not sexually attracted to you, but is insanely jealous about other women spending time with you in which case you need to NEXT her immediately.

3. sexually attracted to other women and thinks you were being selfish by not inviting her to participate with you and that other chick. Don't think this is impossible because I've experienced it.


"the best relationships you can have are ones that blossom out of friendship." - Wyldfire

I once thought like this. If the guy is patient, doesn't try to bed her, listens to all her emotions, etc., the woman will categorize him as "just a friend". Since I've changed my AFC ways, I've made the best friendships and relationships out of one night stands. It's much easier to make a friend from a f**k buddy than to make a f**k buddy from a friend.

"I wish more guys would realize that." - DreamyChick

All the "nice guys" think like that and there's no shortage of those guys.

 

[Hound_of_Love]

Originally posted by DreamyChick
I wish more guys would realize that.

I think most of us realize that but how often does it happen? Almost never. What are the consequences of it all going wrong? Pretty f*cking terrible. As Wyldfire says, most people on here have probably been where she is - I know I was once upon a time and there are few situations that can tear you up like falling for a friend...which is why I find it best not to.

If it happens it happens I guess but I try to avoid it.

What really annoys us is when girls try to be that little bit more than friends, for the attention, with no intention of being anything more.

 

[backbreaker]

Originally posted by Tboner
"She says we're just friends but gets all emotional and upset because I slept with another chick? Should I try to reason with her or just ignore her?" - CherryBreaker

Don't ever try to reason with a woman about feelings. You need to ignore her until she appologizes and makes it up to you. Then, test her by gaming her and going for the lay. She is either:

1. sexually attracted to you in which case you'll lay her easily. Since you said she's not GF material, you could become FB's.

2. not sexually attracted to you, but is insanely jealous about other women spending time with you in which case you need to NEXT her immediately.

3. sexually attracted to other women and thinks you were being selfish by not inviting her to participate with you and that other chick. Don't think this is impossible because I've experienced it.


"the best relationships you can have are ones that blossom out of friendship." - Wyldfire

I once thought like this. If the guy is patient, doesn't try to bed her, listens to all her emotions, etc., the woman will categorize him as "just a friend". Since I've changed my AFC ways, I've made the best friendships and relationships out of one night stands. It's much easier to make a friend from a f**k buddy than to make a f**k buddy from a friend.

"I wish more guys would realize that." - DreamyChick

All the "nice guys" think like that and there's no shortage of those guys.

chris rock said it best when he said "A man is automatically handicapped from winning an arguement because he has the need to make sense" and "A woman isn't going to let a thing like logic mess up her arguement"

In other words, don't waste your time. IF it's one thing I learned from my last EX it's DON'T TAKE THE BAIT!! let her live her soap opera and you do you.

If you really dont' want to be with her (which I think you do) then call her and ask her about it.

If you do want to bang her, keep doing what you are doing.

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

Originally posted by CherryBreaker
Okay, I went clubbing with a very good friend of mine whose a chick and I've known for over a year. She's hot but I know she's not good girlfriend material because she is very selfish, I repeat very selfish so instead of trying to hook up a date with her, I use my DJ skills to use her to get other girls which worked very well until a couple of weeks ago.

Usually, I get a girls number and head right back to talking to her except for this one night where this one girl I hooked up with earlier gave me an excuse to give her a ride home since she wanted to hang out with me the whole night. I said sure, who wouldn't right? Well, after I dropped off my gal friend, both me and this chick hit it off back at my place. I'm not interested in this girl but when the blood starts draining down there, you don't think straight anymore. Well you know what happened.

But back to the main issue, if you reverse this situation, it's happened with her where she would just leave me and go off with another dude while I drive home myself. It doesn't matter to me because we help each other hooking up so it's cool and plus we're friends.

Well, after that incident with me taking home a girl, my gal friend now no longer talks to me, hangs out with me, nothing! Nada!

She says we're just friends but gets all emotional and upset because I slept with another chick? Should I try to reason with her or just ignore her?

Repeat after me:

"Girls make LOUSY friends."
"Girls make LOUSY friends."
"Girls make LOUSY friends."
"Girls make LOUSY friends."

Always and forever. Even if you have "smooth" intentions with her such as using her to get other girls are not AFC over her, they STILL make lousy friends.

You said it yourself, she is selfish. This incident just proves how selfish she is. It's fine for her to screw as many guys like a wh0re, but you go home with one girl and she goes into a hissy fit.

Just forget about her and forget the idea of a "female friend". You want a wingman, get a wingMAN. I know guys who work together and hit it off all the time with women. Plus they're loyal and don't throw hissy fits.

Believe me I tried the similar road you're going down and I've come to the conclusion that girls just don't make good friends most of the time. If you want less stress and drama in your life, stop looking for a "female friend".

Bros for life.

 

[Hound_of_Love]

Re: Re: Friend who's a girl is very upset

If you want less stress and drama in your life, stop looking for a "female friend".

I have to disgree here. I agree that you shouldn't go looking for female friends just because they're female, but I have some totally cool female friends. There's no attraction there so we can just kick back together.

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

Originally posted by Wyldfire
If you genuinely like this girl as a person I'll say this much...the best relationships you can have are ones that blossom out of friendship.

That's a played out, untrue cliche. It just doesn't work like that in the real world. That cliche just got around because people watch too many sappy, unrealistic romantic movies/flicks.

The best relationships blossom out of the man making his romantic intentions clear and then building a relationship on trust. Very, very seldom does the man hiding his romantic intentions and just being a "nice friend" ever result in a functional relationship.

Hell, that's one of the main reasons this forum exists in the first place....because too many men have your unfounded and misguided belief that relationsips blossom out of friendships.

Again, it almost invariable doesn't work in the real world.

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

Re: Re: Re: Friend who's a girl is very upset

Originally posted by Hound_of_Love
I agree that you shouldn't go looking for female friends just because they're female,

Well that's pretty much the point of my post. It is clear he's actively LOOKING for someone as a friend in his clubbing outings and I'm telling him not to look for a friend because she's female.

 

[Hound_of_Love]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Friend who's a girl is very upset

Originally posted by TillTheEndOfTime
Well that's pretty much the point of my post. It is clear he's actively LOOKING for someone as a friend in his clubbing outings and I'm telling him not to look for a friend because she's female.

Apologies. I took the emphasis from: "Girls make LOUSY friends."

 

[Q-Pid]

Can Platonic love ever exist between a man and a woman? John Donne (who's name is, interestingly, almost the opposite of Don Juan) did not think so.

 

[Wyldfire]

Originally posted by Tboner
"She says we're just friends but gets all emotional and upset because I slept with another chick? Should I try to reason with her or just ignore her?" - CherryBreaker

Don't ever try to reason with a woman about feelings. You need to ignore her until she appologizes and makes it up to you. Then, test her by gaming her and going for the lay. She is either:

1. sexually attracted to you in which case you'll lay her easily. Since you said she's not GF material, you could become FB's.

2. not sexually attracted to you, but is insanely jealous about other women spending time with you in which case you need to NEXT her immediately.

3. sexually attracted to other women and thinks you were being selfish by not inviting her to participate with you and that other chick. Don't think this is impossible because I've experienced it.


"the best relationships you can have are ones that blossom out of friendship." - Wyldfire

I once thought like this. If the guy is patient, doesn't try to bed her, listens to all her emotions, etc., the woman will categorize him as "just a friend". Since I've changed my AFC ways, I've made the best friendships and relationships out of one night stands. It's much easier to make a friend from a f**k buddy than to make a f**k buddy from a friend.

"I wish more guys would realize that." - DreamyChick

All the "nice guys" think like that and there's no shortage of those guys.

You can't build a REAL friendship with someone who is only PRETENDING to be your friend because he wants more.

I've loved HARD twice in my life...and both of those men were genuine friends.

 

[Wyldfire]

Originally posted by TillTheEndOfTime
That's a played out, untrue cliche. It just doesn't work like that in the real world. That cliche just got around because people watch too many sappy, unrealistic romantic movies/flicks.

The best relationships blossom out of the man making his romantic intentions clear and then building a relationship on trust. Very, very seldom does the man hiding his romantic intentions and just being a "nice friend" ever result in a functional relationship.

Hell, that's one of the main reasons this forum exists in the first place....because too many men have your unfounded and misguided belief that relationsips blossom out of friendships.

Again, it almost invariable doesn't work in the real world.

It most certainly DOES work that way in the real world...as long as both friends are attracted to each other. In this case it is OBVIOUS that the girl likes him. He has already said he's attracted to her, too. As long as the attraction is mutual then friendships that blossom into more are far, far superior to any other kind of romantic involvement.