"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Friend pisses me off with women

mahon83050

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I have a friend who is a year younger (about the same in the looks dept as me, maybe a little better), has alot more experience with girls and meets alot more girls than me.

So, why am I pissed?

How come everytime I talk to him, he has to mention the fact that he hooked up or met some chick? If I meet a chick, I usually keep it to myself....your friends don't want to hear about you hooking up...etc...it just leads to jealousy in my opinion.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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flexion_

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People that hook up with a lot of women don't talk about it. Most likely he is full of it. I'm not sure why it bothers you - unless you are jealous for some reason?
 

mahon83050

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flexion_ said:
People that hook up with a lot of women don't talk about it. Most likely he is full of it. I'm not sure why it bothers you - unless you are jealous for some reason?
Yea, I am jealous to some degree. He goes out and gets tanked, and most likely the girl is tanked.
 

realsmoothie

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flexion_ said:
People that hook up with a lot of women don't talk about it.
Agreed on this... and I'm learning it quickly. A year ago if I even sniffed a girl I'd tell everyone around. Now I've noticed that I actually feel like I'm doing myself a disservice by telling anyone about my late-night activities.

That kind of stuff sounds better when other people bring it up. I'll always get to work and the girls will be like "so what happened to YOU last night" with big smiles on their face. You just smirk and shrug.
 

mahon83050

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realsmoothie said:
Agreed on this... and I'm learning it quickly. A year ago if I even sniffed a girl I'd tell everyone around. Now I've noticed that I actually feel like I'm doing myself a disservice by telling anyone about my late-night activities.

That kind of stuff sounds better when other people bring it up. I'll always get to work and the girls will be like "so what happened to YOU last night" with big smiles on their face. You just smirk and shrug.
I don't think he makes it up...he is not that type of guy and I know he gets chicks. I just don't understand why he has to talk about it (he does not go into details at all) but he makes you know he got some a$$.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Hitman10000

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I recommend that you drop your envious attitude of him and watch/learn from him. It's better to learn from a pro right in front of your eyes than taking advice from the internet.
 

mahon83050

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Hitman10000 said:
I recommend that you drop your envious attitude of him and watch/learn from him. It's better to learn from a pro right in front of your eyes than taking advice from the internet.
He's no pro. Even though he says these women are cute/hot...I do not know what they look like and most of the time he is ****faced and so are the women.....ever hear of liquid confidence?
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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You're jealous and he's bragging. Both of you need to realize that both are an extreme and that there's a less pervasive way for both of you to get what you want.
 

mahon83050

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Francisco d'Anconia said:
You're jealous and he's bragging. Both of you need to realize that both are an extreme and that there's a less pervasive way for both of you to get what you want.
He doesn't really say it in a bragging manner, but why brag? Just like jealously, bragging is an insecurity.

It annoys me because he gets alot of women (so he says) and knows I don't get that much. When I score, I don't really feel the need to tell him.
 

Eccentric

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My friends brag about how much ass they get. Then I realize they just recycle each others ex girlfriends which I find pathetic. Sure I don't have a girl around my arm now, and I'm not jealous. I just let one go and feel free again. Where they are stuck on the merry go round. They keep spinning in circles with no direction, but because they change horses, it's a new "experience."
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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