"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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FR: Proximity Approach or Just Coincidence?

evesman

Don Juan
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Second night out in a row. Solo of course. Finally, I see pretty girls out. I'm too shy to approach them. What do you make of this:

I see two hot girls (one blonde one brunette) in two separate groups in this club I try out. I lose track of them, even though I try to follow them (at a safe distance). I stand in the middle of the dance floor, which is completely empty. Magically, the blonde hot chick and her three girlfriends walk up and begin dancing right next to me on my right. Then, the brunette hot chick and HER three girlfriends walk up and begin dancing directly on my left. I wonder if I should dance with them. After a song or two, both groups of girls disappear into the crowd, in opposite directions.

I drift off...

I walk back to the dance floor. It's empty again. The same two groups of girls approach again, in exactly the same positions as before. This seems like aw awfully big coincidence.

Do you think this is a coincidence, or is it a proximity approach? Were they trying to get my attention?
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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MikeYikes122

Master Don Juan
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In my experience, proximity is a great indicator of interest, but I think you have to have some experience before you can tell when it's just mere coincidence or if it really is females trying to invite you to approach. Truthfully, I would have had to been at the club with you to be able to tell if this group of ladies were using proximity to get try to you to approach.

My advice is to not even think or worry about it and approach regardless. Once you get some experience under your belt, you'll be able to pick up on signs like this much better. :up:

Just a quick tip though. If a girl keeps touching up against you, that's usually a sign that she wants you to approach. Say for example, you're at a club that is crowded but not too crowded, and the same girl keeps touching her shoulder next to yours for fairly long periods at a time. There's about a 85 percent change that she is into you and wants you to approach.
 

evesman

Don Juan
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Yeah, that's true, I guess I should've just manned up and gone for it, instead of mentally masturbating about it afterwards. :eek:

MikeYikes122 said:
In my experience, proximity is a great indicator of interest, but I think you have to have some experience before you can tell when it's just mere coincidence or if it really is females trying to invite you to approach. Truthfully, I would have had to been at the club with you to be able to tell if this group of ladies were using proximity to get try to you to approach.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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