"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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FR: Need humane ways to lower interest

Darth

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Hi everyone. Darth reporting in.

So I went over to this Chinese girl's place. She cooked for me and we ended up making out for over an hour. During this, I said some pretty stupid things in the heat of the moment that, looking back, were a mistake.

For instance, she said I'm not the kind of guy that dates a lot of women. Are you? Am I wrong? So I looked at her and said, no. She also asked me if I had had other girls in the past. Tell me the truth, she said. I said, no, I've never kissed anyone before you. She hadn't either.

And, I told her I liked her and that sometimes it was lonely without someone to talk to.

Complete wuss-type stuff.

Now, to my credit, I did some things right. I didn't tell her I loved her. I also told her straight up I'm not marrying her, so she doesn't get the wrong impression. But then I said but as long as we're here in the same city, you know....

And trailed off.

Now, this is a sensitive girl. If I stopped seeing her, it would completely break her heart.

It's true, no girl has ever been THAT into me before. I found a blog on the Internet with my name in it. The site was down, but I clicked "cache" and read it. It was an imaginary letter to me and "love at 2nd sight" and "How did I meet you I need to pray and thank Lord."

But I left the wrong impression. I'm not THAT into her. I said certain things because I wasn't thinking straight at the time.

However, I would like to keep things open for other girls I know. So what, proceed as normal and just limit this Chinese girl to once every week or two? Technically I didn't commit to anything (except imply that I would see her for two years, which is pretty big).

Am I making too much out of this?

Maybe I should just be honest next time and say, look, I want you to know, there *are* other girls I'm seeing. But what's the most tactful way to say this.

I need some techniques to both limit time commitment on my part and make her so she isn't taking this so seriously. Before it's too late.

Thnks.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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underoath777

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Just turn into a COMPLETE AFC. Here's some stuff I recently did, to lose my girl!

This involves

1) Countless hours on the phone.
2) Texting ALL day
3) Writing her songs, and poems


and stuff that I didn't do, but is BEYOND AFC
1) send her a text...keep texting her until she responds
2) call all the time, leave mad messages


and here's some crazy stuff
1) Tell her you do drugs, she's too good for you.
2) Make yourself weird. "Apart from this meal you cooked me, my entire diet is fudge. Nothing but fudge."
3) Cry about things. "My mom just called and she said she won't be home till 8. I was expecting my fudge at 7:30. Why do bad things always happen to me???"

Have fun with it! This is like "How to lose a guy in 10 days" lmao
 

Crissco

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underoath777 said:
Just turn into a COMPLETE AFC. Here's some stuff I recently did, to lose my girl!

This involves

1) Countless hours on the phone.
2) Texting ALL day
3) Writing her songs, and poems


and stuff that I didn't do, but is BEYOND AFC
1) send her a text...keep texting her until she responds
2) call all the time, leave mad messages


and here's some crazy stuff
1) Tell her you do drugs, she's too good for you.
2) Make yourself weird. "Apart from this meal you cooked me, my entire diet is fudge. Nothing but fudge."
3) Cry about things. "My mom just called and she said she won't be home till 8. I was expecting my fudge at 7:30. Why do bad things always happen to me???"


Have fun with it! This is like "How to lose a guy in 10 days" lmao
LMAO
 

underoath777

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Dude I havent made out with a girl for an hour in like 5 years. Either we're moving forward or I'm going home lol.
 

Darth

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And now the calling starts.....
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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romanticpoet

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1) Complete AFC
2) Slowly start talking less and less/hanging out with her (ex like 3 times a week to 2 to 1 time to every other week etc)
3) This is somewhat *******ish, but if shes really religious then just pretend you're atheist and don't believe in the existence of god
 

katatonia

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Why do you care so much about her feelings? Do you really think a HB would give you a second thought if you turned AFC? Fvck no, she'd give you some bullsh1t about how it's not working out blah blah then she'd be sucking the c0ck of some badboy the next day (and probably let you know about it).
 

Darth

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So now my problem is even bigger. I made out with this other girl (Girl No. 2) last night in her apartment, and now she's changed her status to "in a relationship" last night (I'm not on Facebook, but she told me).

She thinks she's my girlfriend now.

Thing is, I'm not incredibly into her either, but both of these cases were just gut instinct- I mean, when she's just sitting on the couch, or just standing there in her bedroom (Girl No. 1- Chinese), what am I supposed to do?

The thing is, as I get better at this, I am attracting better and better looking girls. I have a date with another girl, Girl No. 3 (who is hotter than either of the other two), but I feel like I have to break off these pseudo-relationships first.

To Girl Number 1, I actually explained to her that I was dating other girls, and at first she was confused:

"I've told you that night that people won't tolerate someone who is dating with several people (including he/she is a gay or les^^), they will call him/her playboy/playgirl( Do you have this word?)"

but now she accepts it as a cultural difference and still wants to go out with me.

I'm beginning to see that kissing a girl on the lips apparently makes them think that you made a commitment. I didn't really realize that.

Any advice to help me out of this mess without hurting people's feelings?
 

Buddha_Mind

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LOL. This is a good thread. Man, I'd say you are doing things well. You've got two girls who want to be with you. I've been in the same shoes where you may enjoy them, but not want to be with either.

Just keep doing your own thing. Take out Girl3 and enjoy her. If she is someone you'd like to know further, then keep going man. Girl1 and Girl2 will pickup on things as your behavior changes.

Don't be mean to anyone, but don't speak of commitment and keep living your life!
 

sodbuster

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KISSING doesn't mean you are in a relationship,They are trying to suck you into THEIR worldview.Don't need to tell them you are dating other girls,let them figure it out by the limited amount of time you spend with them.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

Read more...

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