"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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FR: Mixed results on date

TheBaconator

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As some of you know from my previous posts I set up a date with an old friend of my ex's, well now i'm here to tell and get advice on where to go from here. Overall the date was a lot of fun, but the only thing that messed it up in the end was this girls ex bf.

The origional plan was for us to go to the zoo, but we ended up taking the wrong train which we both thought was hilarious and then figured it was too late and just decided to walk the city. We went to the museum of sex which was interesting and other then that just pretty much walked and talked for the whole day. From about 12 to 6 we just had a great time walking and pretty much being lost with nothing to do. We talked about everything from school to sex to our exs and sh*t.

So she was supposed to go home and possibly meet up with her ex (whom she said she just started hookin up with again, i didn't know about this) but I convince her that she would have more fun just stayin out with me for some drinks. I hadn't made a move yet because she wasn't giving me strong signs yet and I was just enjoying the day.

So we go to a couple of bars and get tipsy, then end up going to some BS comedy show where we mock the corny ass comedians. Then she gets a call from her ex and finds out hes out at the club with a friend and two girls. She gets upset and I tell her shes such a hypocrite (in a good way though, she laughs at it cuz she knows i'm right) and then I pull her for a kiss. She says "no I can't your **** ex" but doesn't stop and then begins to kiss back. She is still upset about the ex, so much that she wants to go back to brooklyn to the place where he is to beat up the girl. I try to convice her that it's not the girl she should be mad at and that she shouldn't really be mad at all, but she doesn't listen. So this girl is drunk and I can't let her be travling on the trains and walking the streets alone so I agree to go back with her and then we will split a car home.

We go back to BK, but she doesn't end up seeing the ex, just has some convo with him while I was chilling and I assume it ended pretty bad because she was still upset, and now she was saying they were done for good. So we take a car home and hook up when she leaves, tells me she will call me tommorow, and that's the date. I know she had a great time all day up until the end, and so did I, so like I said it was mixed results.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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The Bat

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She still keeps her ex around AND tells you about it?

I hope you are not looking for anything serious from her. And my god, man, a 6 hour (possibly longer?) date? What is she your best friend or wife that you're willing to spend almost half of your day with her on the first date?

Honestly, I think you might become friend zoned if you keep going out on "dates" with her. Just lay this girl next time and don't expect anything serious from her.
 

TheBaconator

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I wasn't looking for anything serious, nor am I now, like I said I just figrued to go out and have a good time, which is what I did. And we were friends before so we had alot of older memories to talk about.

I don't care if she had the ex around, it didn't nor does it bother me. If she goes back with him I chalk it up as a learning experience, if not then who knows.
 

DavenJuan

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i know its easier said than done..

but there are plenty of women out there who isnt "dramatized" with their ex boyfriend.

the whole time you are telliing this story im just wanderin' how the ex would act if he found out YOU were hanging out with his ex gf? she wanted to beat his date up, how do you know he wouldnt feel the same way?

plus the biggest issue is the fact that she could care less that she was telling you about hooking up with some other guy when YOU guys were hanging out. she wanted to leave and go meet up with this other guy while he was on a date..

bad news brother.. trust me... STAY AWAY
 

TheBaconator

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DavenJuan said:
i know its easier said than done..

but there are plenty of women out there who isnt "dramatized" with their ex boyfriend.

the whole time you are telliing this story im just wanderin' how the ex would act if he found out YOU were hanging out with his ex gf? she wanted to beat his date up, how do you know he wouldnt feel the same way?

plus the biggest issue is the fact that she could care less that she was telling you about hooking up with some other guy when YOU guys were hanging out. she wanted to leave and go meet up with this other guy while he was on a date..

bad news brother.. trust me... STAY AWAY
I hear what you are saying, she didn't tell the ex bf about goin out with me so I don't gotta worry about that. And also, I talked to her about how i'm seeing other women, so I really didn't think it was that big of a deal. It's not like we were gonna be exclusive after a date, or anytime soon for that matter.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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