Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Yeah but the whole PUA stuff is played out. We've advanced. What can we learn from them at this point in the game? Pickup is extremely circumstantial and invidualistic.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
I am certainly all for those kind of posts too. But there are a lot new guys who routinely show up here that don't have the same level of experience or learning when it comes to women that we do from having been here for a number of years. Dissecting field reports is generally the best way to learn from their mistakes and others' mistakes. Pickup is certainly circumstantial but it is where it all begins.
I like field report posts and I comment on them when I see them.
Not my experience with bartendresses. They can be very frisky and that's why it's called "escalation." Everything is situational. However I think under the thigh was too far (and logistically weird, how does that work?). A very slight knee touch while talking would be safer IMO.
I see, true, point taken.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Agree with you there. Gotta let them do the heavy lifting if they want to play. There are some workarounds, like leaving her your number so there's no pressure on her. Usually I'm the one being pawed anyway.
Why does it baffle you? Combine horniness, loneliness and intoxication and it makes perfect sense.