"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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FR: First week in Saigon

Leporello

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So I've been in Saigon for about a week now, and it's pretty intense. The heat, of course, and the traffic. I'm in a TEFL (Teacher of English as a Foreign Language) program with some other Westerners and most of my time is taken up by classes. I'm also living in a single room in a small guesthouse in what is known as the 'Expat's Ghetto', which is certainly an accurate name. When i get a job I'll find a real apartment.

Vietnamese girls are beautiful, but so far I've only ran into a very few who can speak English. This may be my own fault since I haven't really made an effort to find the better-educated circles yet. A few women have oohed and aahed at my white skin and blonde hair, but they managed to be either extremely tiny or just plain.

I went out last night with some American British people in my program but since I don't really like clubs it wasn't much fun. A couple of cute girls did wave at me and kind of beckon, but I could barely keep my eyes open since I had been awake since 6 am (there's a fvcking rooster living somewhere in the alley where I'm staying) and I'd just had a couple of beers. I later heard from a Vietnamese friend of mine that the club we were in (Apocalypse Now) was known as 'Poxy Lips' for its profusion of prostitutes, so maybe I dodged a bullet.

I'll be going out again tonight and report back.

PS: and if any 20something DJs in the area have advice I'd be glad to hear it.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Ken785

Master Don Juan
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DAmn man...i thought about doing that. Ive been to Saigon...im Vietnamese. Its so great! Maybe we can hang sometime if i ever go back there man... PM me.
 

Leporello

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Not much new to tell... more women demanding to feel my skin and stroke my hair. Alas! They couldn't speak English either. Where are the english-speakers all hiding?
 

seagull

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I love Ho Chi Minh City, I was there last month. I was amazed by the number of attractive women there. It is not something that I expected as before I went there I gave little thought to Vietnamese women. But as soon as I left the airport in a taxi, I saw gorgeous women riding around on scooters everywhere! And unlike the men there who seem to dress in rags, the women dress well, are slim (unlike in the Western world) and have that typical feminine Asian personalities (again lacking in the West). If you hang around District 1, you are more likely to find English speakers (although, unfortunately, you'll also find lots of tourists there too as that is the main tourist drag).
 

Leporello

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seagull said:
I love Ho Chi Minh City, I was there last month. I was amazed by the number of attractive women there. It is not something that I expected as before I went there I gave little thought to Vietnamese women. But as soon as I left the airport in a taxi, I saw gorgeous women riding around on scooters everywhere! And unlike the men there who seem to dress in rags, the women dress well, are slim (unlike in the Western world) and have that typical feminine Asian personalities (again lacking in the West). If you hang around District 1, you are more likely to find English speakers (although, unfortunately, you'll also find lots of tourists there too as that is the main tourist drag).
I'm living in District 1 as it is, but in the scuzzy part and not in the nicer area around Dong Khoi. The DJ plan for the moment is to get in touch with some friends/family of the Vietnamese people I met at uni and, once i start teaching, see who the other teachers know.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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