"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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FR: First week in Saigon

Leporello

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So I've been in Saigon for about a week now, and it's pretty intense. The heat, of course, and the traffic. I'm in a TEFL (Teacher of English as a Foreign Language) program with some other Westerners and most of my time is taken up by classes. I'm also living in a single room in a small guesthouse in what is known as the 'Expat's Ghetto', which is certainly an accurate name. When i get a job I'll find a real apartment.

Vietnamese girls are beautiful, but so far I've only ran into a very few who can speak English. This may be my own fault since I haven't really made an effort to find the better-educated circles yet. A few women have oohed and aahed at my white skin and blonde hair, but they managed to be either extremely tiny or just plain.

I went out last night with some American British people in my program but since I don't really like clubs it wasn't much fun. A couple of cute girls did wave at me and kind of beckon, but I could barely keep my eyes open since I had been awake since 6 am (there's a fvcking rooster living somewhere in the alley where I'm staying) and I'd just had a couple of beers. I later heard from a Vietnamese friend of mine that the club we were in (Apocalypse Now) was known as 'Poxy Lips' for its profusion of prostitutes, so maybe I dodged a bullet.

I'll be going out again tonight and report back.

PS: and if any 20something DJs in the area have advice I'd be glad to hear it.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Ken785

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DAmn man...i thought about doing that. Ive been to Saigon...im Vietnamese. Its so great! Maybe we can hang sometime if i ever go back there man... PM me.
 

Leporello

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Not much new to tell... more women demanding to feel my skin and stroke my hair. Alas! They couldn't speak English either. Where are the english-speakers all hiding?
 

seagull

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I love Ho Chi Minh City, I was there last month. I was amazed by the number of attractive women there. It is not something that I expected as before I went there I gave little thought to Vietnamese women. But as soon as I left the airport in a taxi, I saw gorgeous women riding around on scooters everywhere! And unlike the men there who seem to dress in rags, the women dress well, are slim (unlike in the Western world) and have that typical feminine Asian personalities (again lacking in the West). If you hang around District 1, you are more likely to find English speakers (although, unfortunately, you'll also find lots of tourists there too as that is the main tourist drag).
 

Leporello

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seagull said:
I love Ho Chi Minh City, I was there last month. I was amazed by the number of attractive women there. It is not something that I expected as before I went there I gave little thought to Vietnamese women. But as soon as I left the airport in a taxi, I saw gorgeous women riding around on scooters everywhere! And unlike the men there who seem to dress in rags, the women dress well, are slim (unlike in the Western world) and have that typical feminine Asian personalities (again lacking in the West). If you hang around District 1, you are more likely to find English speakers (although, unfortunately, you'll also find lots of tourists there too as that is the main tourist drag).
I'm living in District 1 as it is, but in the scuzzy part and not in the nicer area around Dong Khoi. The DJ plan for the moment is to get in touch with some friends/family of the Vietnamese people I met at uni and, once i start teaching, see who the other teachers know.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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