B
BeDJ
Guest
This thread needs to be archived. I'll add a theme song.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XWHOF_0-6Hg&t=2m6s
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XWHOF_0-6Hg&t=2m6s
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
FR: Finally landed myself a date after 2 months of straight flaking.
- Thread starter sageproduct
- Start date
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Purefilth
Master Don Juan
Naw man - try this one for size insteadBeginningDJ said:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lQlIhraqL7o
.
^^^^Haha nice.
In all seriousness I think it bears mentioning that this thread is an incredibly good example of exactly what not to do with women. A course could be given on this thread alone. "Do everything exactly opposite what the OP did," would be the only lesson most men would ever need.
The OP is either the greatest troll in internet history or is AFC to the core. To the absolute core. He probably will be all his life, or at least until some catastrophe blasts it all apart.
The girl clearly picked up on his try-hard personality at the very early stages of their relp. The stench of it wafts through all his texting and I'm sure through every moment of their in-person interactions. I can't even imagine how pathetic he comes off in real life. Their relationship will consist of him trying hard to please her at every moment and of her sitting back and letting him do so. In this way, it is indeed a "traditional" relationship.
This type of relationship is the foundation of marriage, where the man is the obedient servant and provider for the woman and her offspring. She rewards him with just enough affection that he will constantly continue to woo her throughout life. In the end he is basically used as a resource for human reproduction, whether it's his DNA or another man's.
I'm reminded of some insects which lay their eggs within other living insects. The larvae hatch, eat the insect host from the inside out while it's still alive and, when they're done, leave nothing but an empty husk.
Some men are, for whatever reason, naturally drawn to this sort of existence. They are termed "AFC" and then later in life "husband" and then even later in life "bitter divorcee with court-ordered child support payments." Their ex-wives become cougars who get pumped and dumped by dozens of guys before realizing that their diminished sexual market value precludes them from obtaining another provider chump. Their children will follow this cycle, ad infinitum.
The relp will last a short or long time and will leave him very devastated when it ends. Hopefully he won't do anything rash when it does.
Finally, one can only hope that this experience will get him back into the game and perhaps to a point where he will actually read the advice given to him next time.
In all seriousness I think it bears mentioning that this thread is an incredibly good example of exactly what not to do with women. A course could be given on this thread alone. "Do everything exactly opposite what the OP did," would be the only lesson most men would ever need.
The OP is either the greatest troll in internet history or is AFC to the core. To the absolute core. He probably will be all his life, or at least until some catastrophe blasts it all apart.
The girl clearly picked up on his try-hard personality at the very early stages of their relp. The stench of it wafts through all his texting and I'm sure through every moment of their in-person interactions. I can't even imagine how pathetic he comes off in real life. Their relationship will consist of him trying hard to please her at every moment and of her sitting back and letting him do so. In this way, it is indeed a "traditional" relationship.
This type of relationship is the foundation of marriage, where the man is the obedient servant and provider for the woman and her offspring. She rewards him with just enough affection that he will constantly continue to woo her throughout life. In the end he is basically used as a resource for human reproduction, whether it's his DNA or another man's.
I'm reminded of some insects which lay their eggs within other living insects. The larvae hatch, eat the insect host from the inside out while it's still alive and, when they're done, leave nothing but an empty husk.
Some men are, for whatever reason, naturally drawn to this sort of existence. They are termed "AFC" and then later in life "husband" and then even later in life "bitter divorcee with court-ordered child support payments." Their ex-wives become cougars who get pumped and dumped by dozens of guys before realizing that their diminished sexual market value precludes them from obtaining another provider chump. Their children will follow this cycle, ad infinitum.
The relp will last a short or long time and will leave him very devastated when it ends. Hopefully he won't do anything rash when it does.
Finally, one can only hope that this experience will get him back into the game and perhaps to a point where he will actually read the advice given to him next time.
theREALsageproduct
Banned
go ahead and ban me again, but...
I think the guys who were legitimately helping me here deserve an update.
Things are absolutely incredible and just rosy. We've known each other for 7 months now, in a relationship for the last 4. We've seen each other every single day for the last three months, the only two exceptions being when she was out of town with family.
Not a SINGLE fight.
Things are getting serious. She's going to delay her own life to move with me wherever I go for graduate work when I finish up school this next year. I decided that if she's doing that, it'll be best for her to move in with me this upcoming school year so that any serious problems that may arise will come up BEFORE she makes that sacrifice. She's basically been living with me the last two weeks and is bringing all her stuff in this coming week. We're splitting all the bills down the middle.
This is pretty much how our relationship works:
Me: Hey let's go do ___________
Her: Ok.
When we're together, we can't keep our hands off of each other. She's subconsciously scared of losing me so I constantly reassure her, telling her how I see us being just as affectionate with each other when we're 80 years old.
She's from a small town and naive about money matters, so I'm working on her credit for her. I've added her as an AU to all of my credit cards, so she has access to my entire 12k of credit. She pays them off every month of course and barely charges anything to them.
BACKBREAKER you were spot on in just about everything here
I think the guys who were legitimately helping me here deserve an update.
Things are absolutely incredible and just rosy. We've known each other for 7 months now, in a relationship for the last 4. We've seen each other every single day for the last three months, the only two exceptions being when she was out of town with family.
Not a SINGLE fight.
Things are getting serious. She's going to delay her own life to move with me wherever I go for graduate work when I finish up school this next year. I decided that if she's doing that, it'll be best for her to move in with me this upcoming school year so that any serious problems that may arise will come up BEFORE she makes that sacrifice. She's basically been living with me the last two weeks and is bringing all her stuff in this coming week. We're splitting all the bills down the middle.
This is pretty much how our relationship works:
Me: Hey let's go do ___________
Her: Ok.
When we're together, we can't keep our hands off of each other. She's subconsciously scared of losing me so I constantly reassure her, telling her how I see us being just as affectionate with each other when we're 80 years old.
She's from a small town and naive about money matters, so I'm working on her credit for her. I've added her as an AU to all of my credit cards, so she has access to my entire 12k of credit. She pays them off every month of course and barely charges anything to them.
BACKBREAKER you were spot on in just about everything here
I lived with my first GF from 20-24. If I were to tell my 20-year old self the sacrifices and result that left him emotionally and mentally crippled, he would not listen either. If you must give up the best years to party hard, here is what I learned for living together.
1) Declare your bathroom space and stick to it.
2) Use Excel to keep track of ALL rent and bills.
3) If she already has pets, make sure you can accept them as your own.
4) Cooking and cleaning should be the woman's responsibility, you are in charge of the automotive/yard/maintenance etc. Random cooking/cleaning here and there are okay, but the more often you do it, the less she will. It does not stop at 50/50 either. If you go down this road, the house will be dirty and it's your turn to clean it up.
5) You will find yourself very comfortable with her. You'll pack on a few pounds without knowing it. Even your ambition will take a hit because 'as long as we have each other, I don't care' mentality. Be cautious.
6) She will start watching more TV or Netflix after the initial honeymoon of living together phase. I personally despise someone sitting on their ass watching TV shows/movies. As much as you think, chicks have really nothing else better to do.
7) There will be an event with the EX boyfriend. Make sure your nuke that fvcker from her existence. There will be other events that brings jealousy, call her out on it. If this dude keeps hitting on her, tell her you don't like it.
8) Get her on the pill and remind her when she forgets.
Anyways, to the new members here. OP was a AFC who met his one-itis and bend over backwards to be with her. He has yet to bang her after 5 or so months. Hopefully, he lost his virginity now.
This is an excellent example of how men come to SoSuave to 'learn the ways' but most will revert back to being AFC's. It's the lifelong conditioning that is difficult to unlearn and overcome So once OP found some sort of intimacy he threw everything he learned on SS, as well as his logic out the door.
If a lovey dovey hold my hand titanic fantasy fingering you're after, then you need to check your own self worth. Most people, such as the OP, weren't conditioned to be alone. This site teaches you that...if you put effort into it. With the emotions he is putting into his writing, you can easily tell who has the FRAME in the relationship. For a guy that's been her for over 3 years with ~1,000 posts and that rep, he was a Keyboard Jockey. Some men simply can't kill the beta.
1) Declare your bathroom space and stick to it.
2) Use Excel to keep track of ALL rent and bills.
3) If she already has pets, make sure you can accept them as your own.
4) Cooking and cleaning should be the woman's responsibility, you are in charge of the automotive/yard/maintenance etc. Random cooking/cleaning here and there are okay, but the more often you do it, the less she will. It does not stop at 50/50 either. If you go down this road, the house will be dirty and it's your turn to clean it up.
5) You will find yourself very comfortable with her. You'll pack on a few pounds without knowing it. Even your ambition will take a hit because 'as long as we have each other, I don't care' mentality. Be cautious.
6) She will start watching more TV or Netflix after the initial honeymoon of living together phase. I personally despise someone sitting on their ass watching TV shows/movies. As much as you think, chicks have really nothing else better to do.
7) There will be an event with the EX boyfriend. Make sure your nuke that fvcker from her existence. There will be other events that brings jealousy, call her out on it. If this dude keeps hitting on her, tell her you don't like it.
8) Get her on the pill and remind her when she forgets.
Anyways, to the new members here. OP was a AFC who met his one-itis and bend over backwards to be with her. He has yet to bang her after 5 or so months. Hopefully, he lost his virginity now.
This is an excellent example of how men come to SoSuave to 'learn the ways' but most will revert back to being AFC's. It's the lifelong conditioning that is difficult to unlearn and overcome So once OP found some sort of intimacy he threw everything he learned on SS, as well as his logic out the door.
If a lovey dovey hold my hand titanic fantasy fingering you're after, then you need to check your own self worth. Most people, such as the OP, weren't conditioned to be alone. This site teaches you that...if you put effort into it. With the emotions he is putting into his writing, you can easily tell who has the FRAME in the relationship. For a guy that's been her for over 3 years with ~1,000 posts and that rep, he was a Keyboard Jockey. Some men simply can't kill the beta.
Words can't even describe the fvcking retard you are.theREALsageproduct said:
“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
theREALsageproduct
Banned
Point by Point:Skyy. said:
1) We have one bathroom to share
2) I already do use Excel and send her a "statement" the 5th of each month
3) No pets
4) I'm on a liquid diet and subsequently don't need food
5) I've gotten in better shape since being with her. Lost 10 pounds
6) I don't have cable and she knows it
7) He's married, far away, and inconsequential
8) She's getting an IUD soon
hockeyfreak79
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jul 15, 2013
- Messages
- 1,038
- Reaction score
- 337
Holy sh*t this guy is for real! Wow just wow. Good luck kid!
theREALsageproduct
Banned
LOL the mods are monitoring my posts before they go through. They're THAT worried I'll post something insensible. C'mon what's the worst that could happen?! It's not like I can pretend to be a girl and have cybersex with someone in the forum
@Liquid diet lookup Soylent. I feel like a million bucks with all my nutritional needs completely met
@Liquid diet lookup Soylent. I feel like a million bucks with all my nutritional needs completely met
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Yes but, don't your teeth, taste buds, and aesophagus crave for that bite off a juicy, rich, thick sizzling steak right off the grill and the nip on some crunchy aromatic lemon sprinkled asparagus ?theREALsageproduct said:
Purefilth
Master Don Juan
? im unaware of any monitoring here -I'm not Uncle Obama:cheer:theREALsageproduct said:LOL the mods are monitoring my posts before they go through. They're THAT worried I'll post something insensible. C'mon what's the worst that could happen?! It's not like I can pretend to be a girl and have cybersex with someone in the forum
theREALsageproduct
Banned
Take the asparagus out of the picture and yeah I do, so I head to a steakhouse when I feel like it. But I have no need to cook anymore.ludis said:Yes but, don't your teeth, taste buds, and aesophagus crave for that bite off a juicy, rich, thick sizzling steak right off the grill and the nip on some crunchy aromatic lemon sprinkled asparagus ?
I dont generally use PUA terms, but damn OP, you have extreme one-itis right now. And some of the things youve said to this girl...rape jokes...calling yourself creepy....jeez. Granted shes your girlfriend now, but I still dont think its emotionally healthy for a guy to be that into a girl who doesnt seem to reciprocate in kind.
I dont see this lasting long OP. Despite all that you have said, she doesnt seem to be into you as much as youre into her. I wouldnt be surprised if she gets GIGS and bails on you for someone shes more into.
You are overly invested in this. And I couldnt believe how much you were reading into every little interaction you had with this girl. I mean your posts were essay length....and who needs to relay an entire text conversation to guys on a forum? Are you a court stenographer?
Basically my summarized point is that you need to ease up, and make sure this chicks interest level matches yours, or you will end up lonely very soon.
OP, to say all that mushy stuff so soon into a relationship seems pretty needy and over the top. Id understand if you BOTH were in love and it wasnt the beginning of the relationship...but Id personally be freaked out if a girl was saying all that "always be mine" stuff when we just started our relationship.
Too much pressure. And it would make me think shes clingy.
And damn, at 21 years of age, I wouldve had sex with the girl within the first month. I wish you the best OP...but it seems like your gf runs the show and that you have her on a pedestal.
I mean WTF....putting some girl youve only known 7 months as an authorized user of your credit cards? Im sorry, but the only women who get that privilege are wives, or girlfriends who youve dated at least a couple years, live together, and intend to marry. You know...women youve vetted a good amount of time. Youre really rushing things here OP, and I wouldnt be surprised if she sees you as a nice guy gravy train.
I dont see this lasting long OP. Despite all that you have said, she doesnt seem to be into you as much as youre into her. I wouldnt be surprised if she gets GIGS and bails on you for someone shes more into.
You are overly invested in this. And I couldnt believe how much you were reading into every little interaction you had with this girl. I mean your posts were essay length....and who needs to relay an entire text conversation to guys on a forum? Are you a court stenographer?
Basically my summarized point is that you need to ease up, and make sure this chicks interest level matches yours, or you will end up lonely very soon.
Agree with this.JohnChops said:
OP, to say all that mushy stuff so soon into a relationship seems pretty needy and over the top. Id understand if you BOTH were in love and it wasnt the beginning of the relationship...but Id personally be freaked out if a girl was saying all that "always be mine" stuff when we just started our relationship.
Too much pressure. And it would make me think shes clingy.
And damn, at 21 years of age, I wouldve had sex with the girl within the first month. I wish you the best OP...but it seems like your gf runs the show and that you have her on a pedestal.
The stupidest thing you can do is let someone who is naive and inexperienced with finances, have control over any of your finances. Jeezus christ dude. I agree with someone who said this earlier; either you are super nice guy to the core, or youre a huge troll. Dont say we didnt warn you if this girl ends up stepping on your heart and taking you to the cleaners one day.theREALsageproduct said:
I mean WTF....putting some girl youve only known 7 months as an authorized user of your credit cards? Im sorry, but the only women who get that privilege are wives, or girlfriends who youve dated at least a couple years, live together, and intend to marry. You know...women youve vetted a good amount of time. Youre really rushing things here OP, and I wouldnt be surprised if she sees you as a nice guy gravy train.
"She's from a small town and naive about money matters, so I'm working on her credit for her. I've added her as an AU to all of my credit cards, so she has access to my entire 12k of credit. She pays them off every month of course and barely charges anything to them."
This is equivalent to playing Russian Roulette. Why in the world would potentially allow your credit score to be destroyed on a whim. You could have a fight and out of spite she could ring up bills that you can't pay and then what?
You have no legasl ties to this woman and even if you did you still could have your credit ransacked and guess what? you'd be riding the bus for awfully long time and forget about home ownership. Is that worth it for some girl?
This is equivalent to playing Russian Roulette. Why in the world would potentially allow your credit score to be destroyed on a whim. You could have a fight and out of spite she could ring up bills that you can't pay and then what?
You have no legasl ties to this woman and even if you did you still could have your credit ransacked and guess what? you'd be riding the bus for awfully long time and forget about home ownership. Is that worth it for some girl?
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
hockeyfreak79
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jul 15, 2013
- Messages
- 1,038
- Reaction score
- 337
She's from a small town and naïve about money matters, so I'm working on her credit for her. I've added her as an AU to all of my credit cards, so she has access to my entire 12k of credit. She pays them off every month of course and barely charges anything to them.
DUDE YOU ARE CRAZY! This girl doesn't need access to your credit cards! WHY FOR--WOW are you out of your mind. My dumb ass friend did the same thing, now he's 8k in CC debt! I even warned my him long long before things started going downhill too. SMH
DUDE YOU ARE CRAZY! This girl doesn't need access to your credit cards! WHY FOR--WOW are you out of your mind. My dumb ass friend did the same thing, now he's 8k in CC debt! I even warned my him long long before things started going downhill too. SMH
theREALsageproduct
Banned
You guys don't understand how AUs work. She can't do sh1t to my credit score. In fact only *i* can mess up her score if I miss a payment, but nothing she does can affect me. I monitor my financial accounts every day and see every transaction. I could instantly cancel all her cards on my account if need be, and if she were to make an abnormally large purchase my ccs' fraud departments would wake up and decline it.
I know I don't need to though. She is as nice of a girl as they come. She knows what I'm worth and won't leave me. You guys are jaded
I know I don't need to though. She is as nice of a girl as they come. She knows what I'm worth and won't leave me. You guys are jaded
And the only thing stopping her from racking up debt under your account is the power of love?
I bet you volunteered to helped the damsel in distress.
I bet you volunteered to helped the damsel in distress.
You shame men who try to help you out while worshiping the only pvssy your pathetic manhood can attain.theREALsageproduct said:
theREALsageproduct
Banned
No, she wouldn't abuse a credit line if it belonged to someone she hated.Skyy. said:
I'm not shaming anyone. You insult me because what I have seems to good to be true. I trust her because she proved herself. She fits all ten/ten characteristics in the "what to look for in a wife" thread
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.