"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
For those that sarge solo
- Thread starter Ricky
- Start date
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Francisco d'Anconia
Master Don Juan
stevera004
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Aug 4, 2004
- Messages
- 267
- Reaction score
- 3
Ricky,
It's true, success breeds success. You may have had a tough year, but face it: no one (save you) really gives a sh!t.
As to your question, I would start with online dating. Go only for the super-fatties and the old (late 30's) divorcees with multiple kids. These are easy pickings and are there to build up your confidence.
Start small, but keep moving.
The line from Shawshank Redemption is playing in my head right now (sorry, I get sentimental when I'm buzzed
), "get busy living or get busy dying"). Ruminate on that for a bit.stevera004 out,
Marlimus
Senior Don Juan
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
iveyleeger
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 17, 2005
- Messages
- 334
- Reaction score
- 0
DoubleA
Senior Don Juan
Ricky,
I tell you what gets me going...
1. I'm SINGLE. That's it, I'm SINGLE. I don't have anyone in my life so I feel that I need to get out meet a lady or two or three.
2. I refuse to settle. I refuse to accept the way things are in my life. I was born to shake the frame of things and what better way than change the things I can change.
3. I refuse to let those women who have wronged me as a MAN, feel they have left standing here WAITING FOR THEM because I had foolish feelings for them. Fvck No. I know out there, there is somebody for me. Not some chick who wants back in, and has a kid. Or coming out some doomed marriage.
4. I am NOBODY's Second Option. I come first. Me. Chicks who treated me like sh1t there's always someone who can treat you better.
5. The vidogame collection has grown. It's making me feel like a
straight-up nerd.
6. I DESERVE BETTER.
7. I love SEX. I love WOMEN. Neither I'm currently getting.
8. I pity those who try and stop me. They need to mind their business..crab azzes. They're eating nice from the table of life. While it continues to serve me scraps. Fvck that. I tried to appreciate, but I deserve more.
9. The look on clowns's faces when their at the bar talking to their girl and she's glacing at me.
10. I do it because new experiences help me to put the past behind me. A new face and different name, eases past regret.
Only to have me do my part in providing the possibility of a brighter day and someone worthy of what I have to give.
Boys, remember. "You can sh1t in one hand. And place a wish in the other. Tell me, which one will happen first??"
My real name is Aaron. I refuse to lose.
josekortez
Don Juan
So long as they joke around with you and dont act neg.Then at least you have a fallback position.If any of them are keen you got yourself a wingman.
Try to remember names joke around and be a good guy with them.If they see you hitting the girls up.Chances are they will want you around so they pick up scraps.Give em the fatties.Do this everywhere you go and you will start to set yourself up.
Make sure they aint roughies though and are at least up to your dress standard as girls will judge you on the group as well.
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
Cesare Cardinali
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Sep 10, 2002
- Messages
- 911
- Reaction score
- 9
You need to think of this like playing a sport. You're not a single guy looking for company. You are a guy going out to play his favorite sport; which just so happens be be going out and creating great interactions with women. You are not going out to pick up a girlfriend and change your life, you are just having fun.
Think of it like being a lone pool player who keeps racking them up and trying new things. You've got to love the game.
Cesare Cardinali
Damm Ricky,
You sounded like me earlier this summer. Us older guys need to take especial care of ourselves (is anyone going to slam me on word usage lol). Our metabolism slows down, strength decreases, gains in the gym come more slowly and require greater recuperation time.
I tried going out two nights in a row (Friday/Saturday) just a couple of weeks back, and this is during a time when I'm working part time mind you, and I was pretty much exhausted. I'm still not sure if I've recovered!
The bottom line is, you MUST recuperate properly. Anything that requires physical or emotional exertion, I try to schedule every other day (night sarges, the gym in particular).
Also, if you have a choice between going solo or winging with a newb, I say go it alone. If you must go with someone specifically for the sake of sarging, split up immediately once you get inside the venue. Do not cling to them, or let them enter your sets. You can pick up some very bad habits from newb wings. You have been warned! Good luck, post a FR.