"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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For the Pigeons

DeepBlue

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Feb 8, 2002
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3
Dear Vet Love,
I'm a decent looking male pigeon and I get a fair amount of action, but the other day I was with this stuck up female pigeon and whenever I went around behind her left side she would turn away to the right, and then when I went around on her right side she turned away to her left. I did this three times and she still kept doing it! I figured maybe it was low Interest Level, but then why doesn't she just fly away instead of standing there playing these games? What should I do next time this happens?

Sincerely,
Tired of the whole "courtship dance" thing.



Vet Love replies:

Dear Tired,
You didn't do anything wrong--you followed the rules exactly and did it three times just like I say in my book, but she still kept playing games. Well, thank her for revealing her true nature as a shrewd, manipulative game playing pigeon. Better you should find out now than after she lays four eggs and you're stuck feeding the nest! Remember guys, if she still turns away after three times, it's sayonara pigeon! Take heed all you roosters, rams, bulls, and stallions, if she wants to take you for a ride, you better be the one holding the reins!

Trust the Love Veterinarian to tell you the truth about the females of the species. You can count on me to separate the honest genetic rituals from gratuitous game playing! The Love Vet will never lead you astray!

Till next time,
Keep up the action,
Vet Love
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Ace of Flames

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 11, 2006
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1,500
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Location
Everywhere you want to be.... I'm like a Visa card
No sense of humor? Life isn't so serious, so don't go about it that way.

We could use a little laughter to break up all the whiny posts around here anyway.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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Joined
Jul 31, 2006
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Ace of Flames said:
No sense of humor? Life isn't so serious, so don't go about it that way.

We could use a little laughter to break up all the whiny posts around here anyway.
Well we dont need that kind of humor,maybe if he had a funny field report.
 
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