"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

Following up on a nnumber close

Joined
Mar 12, 2009
Messages
10
Reaction score
0
For me going out meeting people is no problem. When I go out with buddies or lone wolf style chances are I will meet a chick and we will vibe that night. Following up after sex close or makeout close is easy because we already have that intimate connection. However, for me i struggle like a mofo following up on a plan number close. I normally meet this chicks at bars/clubs so im buzzed they are drunk/buzzed so when i talk to them afterwards its really weird and it fades away after a few days of texting.

What do you all do after you get a plain number close? i usually text two days later some c/f stuff but ive been noticing recently its not sticking. i think another part of my problem is that im really nonchalent and i dont offer to take these chicks out on a date because i really dont care that much.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

WhtRbt

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 19, 2009
Messages
220
Reaction score
6
I usually wait 5-9 days and then text or call. I usually start with some c&f text stuff and then ask her out.

Getting numbers is easy. I think many of them won't work out but as you get better you will get more dates.
 

Freeman

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Feb 26, 2005
Messages
316
Reaction score
2
douchebaggery4ever said:
For me going out meeting people is no problem. When I go out with buddies or lone wolf style chances are I will meet a chick and we will vibe that night. Following up after sex close or makeout close is easy because we already have that intimate connection. However, for me i struggle like a mofo following up on a plan number close. I normally meet this chicks at bars/clubs so im buzzed they are drunk/buzzed so when i talk to them afterwards its really weird and it fades away after a few days of texting.

What do you all do after you get a plain number close? i usually text two days later some c/f stuff but ive been noticing recently its not sticking. i think another part of my problem is that im really nonchalent and i dont offer to take these chicks out on a date because i really dont care that much.

if you really want to hookup with these chicks why are waiting for two days? Remember that when the two of you met you both were drunk-so between that and the fact she probably passed out her number to like ten different dudes-waiting for two days is not good-this is a situation where waiting actually hurts. so if you met her on friday call her up saturday afternoon around 3 or 4. if she likes you she wont trip and she'll like it.
 
Joined
Mar 12, 2009
Messages
10
Reaction score
0
WhtRbt said:
I usually wait 5-9 days and then text or call. I usually start with some c&f text stuff and then ask her out.

Getting numbers is easy. I think many of them won't work out but as you get better you will get more dates.

damm...you wait that long?...i always figured girls would forget who your are after a four or five days. but yea getting numbers is the easy part for me its rebuilding the connection you had in a intoxicated state at the bar.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

Read more...

Joined
Mar 12, 2009
Messages
10
Reaction score
0
Freeman said:
if you really want to hookup with these chicks why are waiting for two days? Remember that when the two of you met you both were drunk-so between that and the fact she probably passed out her number to like ten different dudes-waiting for two days is not good-this is a situation where waiting actually hurts. so if you met her on friday call her up saturday afternoon around 3 or 4. if she likes you she wont trip and she'll like it.
i normally hit them up the next day or day after...usually at the bar the chicks are digging me cause im not the sarging type of guy. i normally will work on one chick for the night and i build a rapport with that one girl for a long time. But usually the chick is pretty buzzed and i am too. i just struggle with getting the rapport that we had going that night. what ends up happening is a few texts back in forth for a few days and it just fades away.
 

WhtRbt

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 19, 2009
Messages
220
Reaction score
6
douchebaggery4ever said:
damm...you wait that long?...i always figured girls would forget who your are after a four or five days. but yea getting numbers is the easy part for me its rebuilding the connection you had in a intoxicated state at the bar.
If a girl is interested in you, she cannot forget you. She will wonder why you haven't called, and when and if you will ever call. While she wonders this, her interest in you will rise.

If a girl is not really interested, but just gives her number out to everyone she meets, then she will forget you, and you can thankfully get rid of her and move on to the next quickly.

If I feel that it will be difficult to 'rebuild the fun connection', then I will casually text the girl before I try to call her. Most girls I know spend 90% of their time texting. They text constantly. If I feel like the connection won't be there because I didn't have the time or foresight to build it when we met, then I text first. Since girls text so much, I think it makes you seem more normal and they will feel more comfortable with you when you ask them out. I often get the first date through a text.

I think it takes higher interest for a girl to answer the phone than to text. For me personally, when I get a phone call I feel annoyed, even before I know who it is. If I get a text however, I feel somewhat excited.
 

Igetit!

Moderator
Joined
Jul 13, 2008
Messages
2,880
Reaction score
920
Location
The United State of Texas
Uhh....well how about not getting drunk while you're getting the number. You ever think about that? My guess is that maybe you don't have as much rappaport/of a connection as you think. I mean,how much of a connection can two people have when they're drunk? I don't think that trying to get a date with a girl while the two of you are both "under the influence" is really the way to go,hence the problem you're having.
 
Joined
Mar 12, 2009
Messages
10
Reaction score
0
Igetit! said:
Uhh....well how about not getting drunk while you're getting the number. You ever think about that? My guess is that maybe you don't have as much rappaport/of a connection as you think. I mean,how much of a connection can two people have when they're drunk? I don't think that trying to get a date with a girl while the two of you are both "under the influence" is really the way to go,hence the problem you're having.
i dont get drunk when i go out but i do have two or three drinks. However it seems chick at bar/clubs are usually out getting drunk so i have no choice but to talk to them because they are under the influence.

also not to sound like a **** but alot of times these chicks approach me or give me strong signals to approach so i know that they are feeling me at the time..but i know half the reason is prob cause they are drinking and feeling good.
 
Joined
Mar 12, 2009
Messages
10
Reaction score
0
WhtRbt said:
If I feel that it will be difficult to 'rebuild the fun connection', then I will casually text the girl before I try to call her. Most girls I know spend 90% of their time texting. They text constantly. If I feel like the connection won't be there because I didn't have the time or foresight to build it when we met, then I text first. Since girls text so much, I think it makes you seem more normal and they will feel more comfortable with you when you ask them out. I often get the first date through a text.

I think it takes higher interest for a girl to answer the phone than to text. For me personally, when I get a phone call I feel annoyed, even before I know who it is. If I get a text however, I feel somewhat excited.

thx for the advice..i usually am the same way i hate talking on the phone unless i know them really well. how long do you usually text till you ask them out? also for that first text do you usually say "Hey this is so and so from such in such bar" or do you go straight from where you left off at?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Igetit!

Moderator
Joined
Jul 13, 2008
Messages
2,880
Reaction score
920
Location
The United State of Texas
douchebaggery4ever said:
i dont get drunk when i go out but i do have two or three drinks. However it seems chick at bar/clubs are usually out getting drunk so i have no choice but to talk to them because they are under the influence

also not to sound like a **** but alot of times these chicks approach me or give me strong signals to approach so i know that they are feeling me at the time..but i know half the reason is prob cause they are drinking and feeling good.
Ok. So if all these drunk girls are sending you these signals to approach them,and you have "no choice" but to talk to them,then how do you plan to solve this problem of the disappearing interest that keeps happening whenever you call them a day or two later? I'd like to hear this one myself.

Because to me,it's not the girls you're connecting with,it's the booze in the girls. Alcohol produces an altered state of mind. So basically,you"re "connecting" to these girls when they're not in their right frame of mind. The so called "connection" last as long as the girl is under the effects of the alcohol. Then the next day when you call her,you expect to pick up from where you left off the night before,but the girl you connected with the night before is gone. The alcohol has worn off and she's back to normal. Unless you plan to keep her drunk for the entire time you know/plan to date her,you'll keep running into the same problem.
 
Top