"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Flirting in front of my friends

GaryNas

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Mar 8, 2004
Messages
203
Reaction score
0
Here's why I absolutely HATE my "friends" and this story reminds me of why I started going clubbing alone! A bunch of us, including my girlfriend, all went to a club Saturday night. Now, during the week I regularly go to another club (alone) and by doing that I've got to know a lot of new people, especially new females.

Anyway, at one point I see 2 women that I know from the club I normally go to... so I go over, say hi and start some chit chat. One of the friends (female) I came with, shot right over to me and asked who they were and if I knew them and she looked at me like I was fvcking both of them right there. Blah. THEN another one of my friends (male) got pissed because I was talking with other girls, who weren't my girlfriend. Finally my girlfriend starts asking me who they were and how I know them. I ade up some BS story, but holy **** this pissed me off. Later I saw another girl I recognized, but just said hi and left it at that...

I really can't stand being scrutinized by my "friends" and girlfriend. I'm my own person and can do what I want. So guys, help me out... how do I get out of this situation?

I broke up with this girl last summer, but then she started hanging around all of my friends. I asked her not to, but she kept doing it anyway. My friends are also my brothers friends so I can't get rid of them. I can't move out because I'm still in school (1 year left) and can't afford it. I have to sneak around EVERYONE. This whole situation stresses me out so much and I know I have to deal with it for 1 more year... :(
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

falloutboy

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 7, 2003
Messages
79
Reaction score
0
Location
NY
if they're your REAL friends, you should have no need to BS in their faces like you did. They should accept you as you are. As you say "I'm my own person."

If they're not, are they really worht all that effort and stress? I say drop em. If you hate them taht much let them know why. Just my 2 cents.
 

GaryNas

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Mar 8, 2004
Messages
203
Reaction score
0
Originally posted by falloutboy
if they're your REAL friends, you should have no need to BS in their faces like you did. They should accept you as you are. As you say "I'm my own person."

If they're not, are they really worht all that effort and stress? I say drop em. If you hate them taht much let them know why. Just my 2 cents.
I have to BS, because they report everything I do back to my girlfriend. I know they're all full of ****, but the problem is they're my brothers friend too, so its not like I could even get away from them. If I do anything *they* don't consider relationship friendly then I have to hear it from my girlfriend... AND even if I did break up with her she'd be around all the mofo time hanging out with my "friends". :(

I have no clue what to do.
 

MacDiddy

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 9, 2004
Messages
1,070
Reaction score
2
Location
Down South. Between the Y junction.
I would prepare for the moment your ex brings a new guy into that cirlce of friends. When that happens, depending on how strong your emotions are, you might find yourself squeezed out. The solution is to get yourself another girlfriend and squeeze her out first. She will be jealous, hurt and will think about you constantly and won't enjoy herself amongst your friends.
 

backbreaker

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 24, 2002
Messages
11,546
Reaction score
572
Location
monrovia, CA
dude, get some new ****ing friends, that's pathteic.

My best friend has been with his Girl for 3 years and she knows better than to expect me to "report" back to her anything. Hell I routinely call him up as a wingman, and he does a damn good job.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

JT47319

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 23, 2002
Messages
665
Reaction score
0
Location
Hermosa Beach, CA
Why the hell do you call her your girlfriend if she's your ex?
 

ScrewIt

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 11, 2004
Messages
1,769
Reaction score
2
dude i understand your actions, they were your bro's buddies and to you, they were more like hangout buddies, nothing more.

They had no right to be nosey and ask who who was.

Just get some of your own friends this time and let them in on what you do.
 

S0LID

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 17, 2004
Messages
944
Reaction score
1
Age
41
stick to clubing alone or find 1 outa the group u can trust.I don think I could go clubing on my own :eek: whats it like the 1st time?
 

AlwaysExcel

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 12, 2004
Messages
293
Reaction score
0
Location
Midwest USA
Treat like you would a woman. If they aren't REALLY your friends, then always be busy when they want to go out with you and be cordial but cool when you do see them. Basically next them like you would a girl in the same class as you or that you must see all the time. They'll get the point.
 

TesuqueRed

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 30, 2001
Messages
1,852
Reaction score
7
Location
SF, US
Originally posted by GaryNas
...I really can't stand being scrutinized by my "friends" and girlfriend. I'm my own person and can do what I want. So guys, help me out... how do I get out of this situation?
What "situation" are you in, exactly?

Did you get caught mounting one of these new girls?

No.

Anything close?

No.

Just talking. Right?

And they're threatened and know how to put the screws on you. They can't keep up and they're trying to keep you in line.

Looks like it's working, huh?

I broke up with this girl last summer, but then she started hanging around all of my friends. I asked her not to, ...
mistake
... but she kept doing it anyway. My friends are also my brothers friends so I can't get rid of them. I can't move out because I'm still in school (1 year left) and can't afford it. I have to sneak around EVERYONE.
And why is this? You're acting like you don't have b@lls when your so-called friends are afraid of just that.

This whole situation stresses me out so much and I know I have to deal with it for 1 more year... :(

Your friends are trying to put a mind-fvck on you, but you're too too willing to do it first. Either you grow to handle this or you take the best girl you can and just live with it and be good. You're about to break into the next level and they're trying to keep you in line. So you're apologizing and trying to have both.

So -- make a choice.
 

“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”

You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.

I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.

Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.

These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.

Read more...

Kineti[C]harm

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 16, 2003
Messages
1,520
Reaction score
2
Your girlfriend isn't really your girlfriend right?! It sounded like she was an ex and she is now a friend of you and your friends. So WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR PROBLEM?! Even if she WAS your current GF you are only TALKING TO THEM.
 
Top